Author: Sunhawk
Pairings: implied 1+2 & 5+S
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Dialogue fic, attempted humor
Disclaimer: I do not own GW.
Bomb Squad Part 1
'Maxwell, what the hell are you doing?'
'Playing Minesweeper, Fei... why?'
'Minesweeper. You're supposed to be getting ready to go out into the field with your team to disarm a bomb that could take out a city block and you're playing... Minesweeper.'
'Hey, I'm ready to go any time they are. The truck isn't here yet; Tank's supposed to call when they cross 6th street... plenty of time to get down to the lobby.'
'But... dear God...'
'Fei, have you talked to anybody in medical about these headaches you keep getting? That's just not right, man.'
'Maxwell, there is something fundamentally wrong with playing Minesweeper at a time like this.'
'It warms me up. Gets my brain perking.'
'But... you're just randomly clicking!'
'Yeah! And look at my stats! I'm working with an 85% 'win' rate and I'm just running sweep patterns!'
'How the fuck is this supposed to 'warm you up'?!'
'Language, man, language. I got my chops busted just last week for dropping the F-word on the job. Though I seriously think there ought to be certain situations where it's allowed; like any time there's a live grenade involved, you know? You really ought to get a pass when somebody lobs one of those babies at you.'
'Or any time dealing with you.'
'What was that? Here...watch this, I'm gonna win this one in four more moves just by hitting the four corners first and...ooops.'
'Oh my God... Maxwell, you can't just... you're our top demolitions expert; please do not ever use the word 'ooops'. And tell me that this is not how you do your damn job!'
'Hey! It's a perfectly valid theory; you can't argue with 85%... there's some sort of greater power at work here! Boom-boom thinks we should test it in the field. We've got a whole hypothesis worked out based on... hang on, that's my phone. Nitro here. Great; meet you out front in five.'
'These nick-names are so damn unprofessional...'
'What was that Fei? Never mind; gotta go. Hey! You wanna go see that new special effects movie with me and Heero tonight? There's supposed to be some killer flash-bang scenes. Just the thing to unwind after a hard day at work.'
'Die Hardest; the Eternal Bomb?! Are you fucking insane? No... don't even answer! Just get going! God... how Heero puts up with you...'
'He finds me amusing, man. We're a match made in Heaven! Think about that movie... might help those headaches of yours.'
'Maxwell!'
'And I can tell you more about my Minesweeper theory...'
'Just go, you fucking idiot!!'
'Langauge, Fei. See ya!'
'...'
'Hey, is Nitro still here, or did I miss him?'
'Nitro?! God, Yuy! Not you too!'
'What?'
'Those childish nicknames are just... just... childish!'
'I thought they were kind of neat. Duo says if I get called out to assist again, I can have one too, but we can't decide between 'C4' or... Wufei? Are you all right?'
'I... have a headache.'
'You look kind of tense. You know, Duo and I are going out to the movies tonight; maybe you should come along and unwind a little bit? The movie looks really good... they blow up one of everything; Duo says the special effects budget was bigger than... Wufei? When did you develop that twitch?'
'Somewhere between 'Tank' and the Minesweeper theory...'
'What?'
'Nothing. I'll see you later.'
'Where are you going?'
'Medical!'
OWARI
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