Silence Part 7
I wake to voices. For the first few minutes, I can't place them. Then I recognize the pattern of Trowa's laconic speech. The other is sharp, almost belligerent. Not Quatre.
Ah, Wufei. Pilot, martial arts master, hacker, scholar, but definitely not a diplomat.
Chang Wufei does not mince words. He and I have gone toe to toe on various occasions over the years and come to a mutual understanding of each other's point of view. He's been a good friend and a great help to Duo since the incident.
Now he and Trowa are arguing. About me! I realize suddenly.
"I want it to stop!" Wufei snarls. "This is hard enough on him without this constant nagging!"
"It's inevitable," says Trowa mildly. "Sooner or later, he has to accept it. No one is nagging; just pointing out the obvious. He's fooling himself if he thinks this is going to change. It's been over two years."
"And it may go on another two years, or ten, or twenty!" Wufei snaps. "It's still Duo's choice. If he believes that hope still exists, then it does! Goddammit, I want everyone to leave him alone!" He is closer to me now. I listen in fascination. "That includes you and Quatre! Stop trying to undermine his confidence!"
"...."
"And stop matchmaking! He's still a married man!"
I am stunned. Matchmaking?! Trowa and Quatre are trying to turn my Duo away from me? How can they do that to me? To us?
I have to do something. I have to make this miserable prison of a body respond somehow.
"Duo needs help, Wufei. He needs to let go."
"Trowa," says Wufei softly, his voice shaking. "Get out of here, now. Before I lose my temper."
Trowa starts to say something. I feel Wufei's hand on mine.
"Get the fuck out!"
I hear footsteps, the door and then silence. A long period of silence. Wufei squeezes my hand.
He gives a long sigh. "Sorry, Heero," he whispers. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be fighting in your room." He leans closer, searching my face. Wufei is one of the few visitors (aside from Duo and Solo) who will look directly into my open eyes.
"Heero," he says quietly. "Trouble is coming. Duo is under fire for being here at night and for holding to his belief that you will recover. I'll stand at his side; you know that. My sword is his, on your behalf." His soft words frighten me. Even more so after hearing him throw Trowa out of the room.
What the hell is going on, Wufei? I need to know! Is my darling in danger or am I?
Maybe he hears me. He brushes a lock of hair away from my eyes.
"The doctors want a conservator appointed. They want Duo declared unfit. I'm following their legal machinations," he says darkly. "And Sally is working to fight them on the medical side, but it doesn't look good right now. Duo's behavior is described as erratic and he's been hallucinating. He claims to see you at home; that you speak to him. He does need to get back into counseling, but I know damn well he isn't crazy! Heero, I promise you, I swear to you, I will not let anyone take Duo away from you."
I can barely take it in; my mind reels with anxiety, fear, anger and confusion. The door opens and I catch Duo's scent. Wufei turns from me, giving my hand a final squeeze.
"Wufei," wails Duo. "What's going on here? Why are they turning on us?" he cries. His face is streaked and blotchy from crying. His violet eyes are dark with betrayal.
Wufei goes to him, wrapping his arms around Duo's shoulders and stroking his hair for reassurance. "They just don't understand," he murmurs. "We'll fight them, Duo. You're not alone."
I've seen Duo at his worst and at his best. I've seen him happy, sad, bored, angry, murderous and so enmeshed in passion he was out of his mind. I have never seen him so starkly terrified. His fear has darkened his beautiful eyes and pulled down the corners of his smile. He looks, I realize with a stab of fury, years older and more fragile than I ever thought possible. The weight of these past years is slowly crushing his once-indomitable spirit.
I cannot bear this! Something has to change! This is killing him!
He lays his head on Wufei's shoulder, clinging to him, sobbing, and Wufei enfolds him tenderly in his arms and gently strokes his shining auburn hair. "I don't... Oh, God, Wufei; I don't know what to do!"
I have a clear view of Wufei's' face. His stern jet eyes soften as he holds Duo in his protecting embrace. I recognize that look. I've seen it often enough on my own face. Wufei is in love with my Duo.
For a moment, I forget everything else. Remarkable! Wufei has always treated the concept of love, romantic love between two people, as something of a character failing. Honor, integrity, duty and responsibility have always seemed more important to him.
I am a jealous man. I gave Duo hell in the beginning, always watching, always measuring his responses to others, often accusing him of infidelities. It took him threatening to punch my lights out and a week's disappearance to make me see (with both my eyes and my heart) that he was true to me, heart, soul and (mostly) body, and if I continued to doubt, I would lose him. But now, oddly, I have no feelings of jealousy. Wufei may be in love with my auburn-braided angel, but it is clear from his words and his actions that he will remain an honorable man.
::Chang Wufei,:: I think, wishing I could tell him. ::If I can't return to him, if this impossible silence takes my life, then you must claim him and give him the happiness he deserves.::
"They aren't going to take him from you," he promises Duo. "I will make them understand. We will fight them, Duo!" he swears grimly. He lifts Duo's chin to look into his reddened eyes. "You are Shinigami; you never lose."
Duo manages a weak smile. "Yeah. Yeah, Death never loses." Wufei releases him, brushing a wild strand of silken hair back from his face.
"That's better. Now, you spend some time with Heero," he orders. "And don't even think about the other crap."
When Wufei has gone, Duo stretches out beside me on the bed. He hugs me close, nuzzling my ear. "He's really a good guy, isn't he?" he murmurs.
Yes, he is; truly a good man.
~*~
In the waiting area, Wufei sprawled in a chair, arms folded, chin on his chest, attempting to order furious thoughts. Duo was almost at the end of his rope. Trying to run his business, be a good parent, deal with Heero's condition and still find a few precious moments for himself was obviously taking its toll on the beautiful young man. Strands of silver had appeared in his thick hair and tiny lines were forming around his eyes and mouth. His raucous laugh was a rare thing these days. Even his smile seemed forced and bleak. And now, this last blow, delivered by two of his best friends, had shaken him to his very soul.
Wufei scowled. What the fuck was wrong with those two?! Quatre had always been so compassionate, so tuned-in to everyone's emotions. Didn't he see that it was ravaging Duo's soul to see the man he loved lying there like a corpse? Couldn't he see Duo's need for comfort, for strength from his friends? Didn't he see that the only release possible for Duo was Heero's full recovery or his death? And not just because the doctors were tired of dealing with him, or because Quatre had a friend who had a friend...
::Matchmaking, my Chinese ass!::
Couldn't he put himself in this position? Would he feel the same if it were Trowa still and silent and unresponsive?
And there was certainly nothing wrong with Duo's midnight visits to Heero's room. He was paying the extortionate fees for this place; he by god had a right to visit whenever he liked. And if he chose to express his love a bit more fully on those visits, Wufei was positive that Heero didn't mind at all.
The nursing center didn't know about that aspect of Duo's alleged misbehavior, and if Wufei had anything to say about it, they never would. No one was supposed to know, but Wufei had made a promise to Heero a long time ago, to watch over Duo if anything ever happened, and he took that promise seriously.
Duo and Heero had been there for him on a number of occasions; he'd be damned if he'd let his friends' lives be destroyed without a fight.
::Damn those two simpletons!::
~*~
Duo's exhaustion manifested itself in a good case of the shakes. Wufei insisted on taking him home and making dinner. Duo fell asleep on the sofa, purring raggedly, with Sweetums standing guard above him.
Rather than wake him when dinner was ready, Wufei tucked a plate into the oven and set the table for himself and Solo.
They talked about Solo's school, his martial arts training, his after school activities and his parents. Wufei did more listening than talking. The boy might have Heero's handsome looks, but he certainly had Duo's volubility. His impishly sparkling eyes and perpetual smile were Duo's as well.
After dinner Solo kissed his father carefully goodnight, collected his pet and went to his room to play, the unblinking reptile draped over his shoulder, watching Duo as if still on guard. Wufei woke Duo to try and get some food into him.
The redhead dragged himself awake and sat up, sighing. He rubbed his eyes and gave Wufei a tired smile when he brought a tray.
"Thanks, Wufei. You didn't have to do this."
"I know that. And you know quite well that if I didn't want to, I wouldn't."
"I know. I just couldn't keep my eyes open another minute." He picked at the food for a while, barely tasting it, before finally sitting back and hugging himself. "I can't... I'm sorry, Wufei. You went to all this trouble... I feel like crap. I feel like... dirt..."
Wufei sat beside him, trying to keep the concern out of his voice. "I know, baby. You need to try, though; you're losing too much weight."
"I know..." He closed his eyes and tears oozed through his smoky lashes. "I'm so bloody tired. All the time now... God, I'm losing my mind over this. I can hardly think at all... I'm ready to take Heero and Solo and run. I don't know how else to deal with this anymore. I won't let him go, Wufei. I won't."
Wufei laid his arm around his friend's shoulders. "You don't have to. I'm here for you, and I won't let anyone get in your way."
Duo reached his arms around Wufei's neck and kissed his cheek. "You're a terrific guy, Wufei," he sighed.
"I know," Wufei smiled, holding him gently. ::My god! I can feel his ribs!:: "Now, finish your rice at least. You can use the carbs."
~*~
"Duo, I don't feel comfortable leaving you alone tonight." Wufei stood in the doorway, arms folded over his chest.
"I'll be okay. C'mon, Wufei; I know you've got better things to do than babysit me." Duo didn't look at him.
"Hunh! Be that as it may, I am not leaving you alone tonight."
"You're as stubborn as Heero!"
"And you're not?"
"Well..."
Wufei took Duo's arm, helping him to his feet. "You'd never make it up the stairs alone."
Duo thought about arguing, but gave it up. It was nice to have someone caring for him, even if it wasn't the person he wanted most.
TBC...
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