Fire in the Hole Part 3
Trowa climbed the gantry to the cockpit of Wing Zero where Heero was working.
"What is it?" Heero muttered, not looking up.
"I want to talk," Trowa returned firmly.
"...."
"It's necessary."
Heero snorted, but put down the ratchet and sat in the pilot's seat.
"What are you doing to Duo?"
Heero blinked. "I'm not doing anything to him," he said curtly.
Trowa looked at him. "I phrased that incorrectly. Why have you severed all emotional contact with Duo?"
Heero stared at him, his cobalt eyes glittering dangerously.
Trowa ignored his anger. "For nearly a month, while Duo was recovering, you hardly left his side. As soon as he was well, though, you turned your back on him completely."
"I have not," Heero said roughly.
"You don't lie very well, Heero. Every time Duo tries to talk to you or otherwise engage your attention, you turn your back on him. You push him away, you ignore him, you call him names; a few days ago you hit him." He paused, noting Heero's gathering fury. "He cares for you, Heero. He cares a lot. Duo's not like you or I, he's not afraid to show his emotions. This is killing him, Heero. It's breaking his heart. You haven't slept in the same bed with him in weeks. Duo loves you; he needs you. He can't survive without affection, without love, without feelings." Trowa's loquacity was absolutely unprecedented.
"Trowa," said Heero tightly, "This is none of your business."
"You're my partner. Duo is my partner. Whatever affects my partners affects me. Unlike you, I am sleeping with my love, and he's afraid of Duo's misery. Last night, because Quatre was so distraught, I went looking for Duo. I found him in the garden at two in the morning, sitting in the mulberry tree. Heero, he was crying." He lifted his hands helplessly. "His heart is breaking..."
"That is not my fault."
"He loves you. He cares so deeply for you --"
"That caring almost got him murdered!" Heero snarled. "He opened the door without checking because he thought it was me! He lost his concentration because of me!"
Trowa stared at him. "Heero..."
"He doesn't need me, Trowa," he snapped. "Love is a liability. I can't afford that distraction and neither can he!" He picked up a screwdriver. "He'll get over it."
~*~
"He said what?!" echoed Quatre in disbelief. "What does he think Duo is? A robot who can be switched off at will?"
Trowa could only shrug. He knew from the start the effort was wasted, but Quatre had asked, and whatever his adored Arab boy wanted, Trowa would give him.
"He feels that Duo would not have been shot if his guard hadn't been down." He held up his hand to forestall another outburst. "He believes that Duo was so distracted by their personal relationship that he failed to be properly cautious. He may be right."
"Trowa!" The angry flush on Quatre's cheeks deepened. Trowa couldn't imagine how he would feel if Quatre suddenly turned his back on him. Suicidal, most likely, he thought as he stroked the smaller boy's cheek.
"No, it's possible that Duo did act with less caution than normal, but I don't believe it was indicative of any sort of mental distraction." Quatre still frowned, but his eyes were no longer angry. "I think it was a matter of timing, and I think that's the way it was planned."
"You believe Duo was the intended target?" Trowa nodded. Quatre eyed him carefully. "And you have a good idea who it was." It wasn't a question.
Trowa nodded again. Duo had no memory of the moments just before the shooting. There had been no arrests; according to the police, not even a good suspect. Which was why they were now at one of Quatre's estates on Earth, instead of an anonymous safehouse.
"It wasn't by chance that it happened just after Heero left. And it wasn't chance that Heero was set up to be the prime suspect." He paused as Quatre caught his breath. Trowa nodded. "Who has reason to cause trouble to both of them?"
"Oh... dear... Oh, Trowa..." Quatre whispered as he made the connections. "No. She wouldn't! Would she?" he asked hesitantly.
Trowa shrugged. "Who else is sneaky, sly and duplicitous enough to do something this convoluted? Duo's place in Heero's heart infuriates Relena. Heero's effect on Relena infuriates Dorothy. Kill Duo, implicate Heero, problems solved. At the least, Heero could be imprisoned, keeping him apart from Relena, or more likely, one of us would become his executioner, with the same result. In either case, Duo would be gone and Relena would readily believe that Heero had turned on him, because it's what she wants to believe. He would become a martyr in her eyes and she could continue to worship from afar, all with the steadfast emotional support of her dear friend, Dorothy Catalonia. Who wins, Quatre?"
"Dorothy," he whispered in horror, hands to his face.
"Not to mention the elimination of two Gundam pilots. OZ wouldn't mind that at all."
"Oh... Oh, my god..." Trowa hugged him close and Quatre clung to him. "Why haven't you told Heero? Or Duo?"
"Because neither of them are in any mood to listen to reason. And there isn't any real evidence against her, only my speculation." He nuzzled his love's golden hair and kissed his cheek lightly. "Dorothy Catalonia's machinations are the least of their problems right now. I don't think any of us can fix this. They have to work it out themselves."
"But they love each other..."
"And maybe Heero will admit to that eventually."
~*~
Heero sat at the breakfast table a few days later drinking coffee and paging through a tech manual. He looked up briefly when Duo entered the room to pour himself a cup of coffee and sit down on the opposite side of the table.
"Good morning," said Heero stiffly, and returned to his book.
Duo apparently took that as an invitation for conversation. He launched into his usual morning chatter, as if nothing had happened between them. Heero was almost forced to acknowledge the never-ending flow and his irritation grew with each passing minute, until finally he slammed his fist on the table, startling Duo into silence.
"What the hell do you want from me?!" he snarled angrily, and Duo flinched. "What does it take to get through to you?!"
For a long moment, the braided boy just looked at him, his face blank. Then he said slowly, in an attempt at humor, "Funny, I was about to ask you the same thing." His tentative smile vanished as Heero continued to glare at him. "So this is it," he whispered, looking away. "I always thought... hoped that one day you'd love me, the way I love you. I guess that was pretty stupid..." He looked up at the boy he loved. Still loved in spite of the continuing rejection.
Nothing escaped from the black holes of Heero's eyes. Emotions went in and never came out again. Except for those fleeting moments of mindless ecstasy in Duo's arms. Apparently, it wasn't enough.
Duo stood up, nodding, trying to be casual. "Okay. I get it. It doesn't take a Mobile Doll to fall on me before I get the point. I'm sorry if I've upset you. I'll do my best to stay out of your way," he said softly. He picked up his coffee mug and walked out of the room.
::Walk away, walk away. Don't look back, don't cry. Don't make me sell us both out.::
Heero exhaled a sigh of irritation when Duo was gone. He would be safer now. He was resilient, with a buoyant, friendly personality; he would find someone else to lavish his affection on.
::And what about you?:: came the sardonic question in his mind. ::Do you go back to contemplating suicide whenever your human fallibility pokes through? Or are you going to pull yourself together and get off the proto-martyr thing?:: He shook his head, ignoring that voice as he usually did. His work was more important.
~*~
Duo found Wufei in the gym working out with several of the Maguanac troops. He sat down and waited until they had finished.
"Wufei," he called as they headed for the showers. The Shenlong pilot turned reluctantly.
An encounter with Duo Maxwell usually left him irritated, exasperated and often murderous, so he approached any off-duty contact with wariness.
"What do you want?" he asked automatically. What was the joke going to be this time? Had he painted Nataku with pink and purple spots again? Or maybe he was angling to get out of his assigned chores. Whatever it was, Wufei would not be surprised.
"Hi, Wufei," he said politely, and the other boy was immediately suspicious. "I need a favor," he began slowly.
"It's not my turn to cook."
"That's not the favor. I wanted to ask... I need... You're the only..." he stumbled over his words, feeling like a bigger idiot than usual.
"Well, spit it out, then," Wufei demanded impatiently.
"Wufei, can I room with you?"
The question took him by surprise. Duo and Heero always shared a room, even before they became lovers. It was the way it was, just as Trowa and Quatre always shared a room. The dissimilar personalities seemed to mesh quite well. Wufei liked having a room alone. He didn't have to tread carefully around someone else's habits and feelings. He had his privacy. He came and went as he pleased with no questions asked. Sharing a room was not on his list, especially with Duo the joker.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
Duo didn't meet his gaze. "I... ah... I can't stay with Heero anymore."
"Why the hell not?"
"Um... He doesn't want me..." he replied faintly.
Wufei's irritation vanished. "He doesn't want you?" he echoed. That was ridiculous; Heero was bewitched by the braided pilot; had been since the beginning. They all knew it. The idea of Heero not wanting Duo was patently absurd. Now he knew what was happening; he was in a dream. He'd dozed off and this was just a wild dream. "What did you do?"
Duo fidgeted with his braid, not looking at Wufei. "I don't know," he said unhappily. "When I was shot, he was so concerned... I really thought he... he..." He shrugged and shook his head, banishing that memory. "He just doesn't want me around anymore... He didn't actually tell me to move out, but I don't think I can... It'd be hard to stay..."
Wufei stared at him, debating. Duo was loud, boisterous and undisciplined, except in the cockpit of Deathscythe. Everything was a joke to him and no one was safe when he was in that mood. Right now, though, Duo looked anything but his usual confident and smart-mouthed self. He looked... lost.
"No teasing," Wufei said sharply, and Duo looked up. "No practical jokes, no leaving the room trashed, no snoring, no chatter and no eating in bed. And you don't lay a hand on my Gundam again."
"Agreed," Duo returned with relief.
"And no hair in the drain."
"Yes, sir," he said meekly. "Thank you."
"You're welcome. Just stay out of my way."
TBC...
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