Author: Merula
Pairings: 1x2
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Yaoi, drabble, Duo POV
Disclaimer: Gundam Wing is not mine.
This one happened later in the same night of the previous drabble.
For sharona1x2, ON Heero/Duo.
One Night Halloween Drabble 3
The sheets are silk. I twitch uncomfortably, not wanting to wake Heero up. He's been so good to me today, I don't want him to know how uncomfortable I am.
Why did he invite me to move in with him? Is he worried about the Org? I know they aren't pleased that not only had he survived, but that he and I are...well, whatever we are. Chang's expression was one of sheer shock when he realized, and I wonder how the Org missed it. Then again most of the missions had required us to pose as a couple... maybe they hadn't realized that we weren't acting? I'm not stupid- I know they had been watching us.
I am not going to kill Heero. No matter what his reasons, he has been good to me. Better than anyone ever has been before. I don't care if he is using me...
That's a lie. I do care. I care a lot.
I don't want Heero to be using me. I want him to care for me... Sometimes I think he really does- other times I'm not so sure. Today, for a bit, I was sure. I could tell he didn't like my apartment, he seemed so happy when I said I'd move in- and all the trouble he went to today over making sure I had one space I felt comfortable in... unlike this silk covered bed of his.
For a moment I contemplate going to curl up on the floor of the loft. I'll be away from this silk that makes my skin itch with memories I wish I didn't have.
But then I won't be with Heero.
I close my eyes and focus on the feeling of Heero's skin under my cheek, trying to ignore the silk, not letting those memories get a hold of me. I'm in a different place now. No one is going to do anything like that to me again.
I'll kill anyone that tries.
It works- until I fall asleep.
I don't have any defenses against the memories here. Not in my mind. Not at night.
You aren't focusing boy! You aren't good enough yet. You need more training. More discipline.
Why don't we play a game?
I wake up with a scream on my lips. Someone grabs me and I lash out. No one is going to force me to do that again! I won't!
A moment later I realize that I'm not in the training center. I'm in Heero's bed.
And Heero's not in it with me.
I scramble to the edge and find him in a heap on the floor, holding the back of his head.
I hurt him.
"Heero!" I reach out for him, but... I don't dare touch him. How badly is he hurt?
"Duo," he squints up at me. "Are you okay? I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have tried to wake you up."
He's apologizing to me? It shouldn't surprise me. That's what Heero does. He always takes the blame, always tries to make me feel better.
Maybe he really does love me as much as he says he does.
"I'm sorry," I say as he reaches for my hand. "I had a nightmare. The sheets- I should've known. It's all my fault. I'm so sorry..."
He lets me pull him back on the bed. Then he pulls me close. "What about the sheets?" He asks, and I tell him. I always tell him things when he asks. He deserves the truth.
His arms are tight around me when I finish. "I'm so sorry, love, so sorry. I didn't know."
"How could you? It's not your fault."
He kisses my forehead and pulls us both out of bed. Then he rips the sheets off the bed and dumps them in the corner. "We'll get some cotton ones in the morning," he says and I can't help but kiss him. He's so good to me.
I'm never letting him go.
OWARI
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