Oh, the melodrama, oh the angst, oh the overdone Marvel references... this is the end of my Cliché fic and oh, does it wallow in my fic clichés. I've done the suicide, the leaving for our lover's own good, the cliffhangers, the mission gone wrong, the evil docs... and this one does end with the one I do the most- the somewhat happy ending.
Here We Go Again Part 6
"I'm right here." Heero stood on the edge of the dry sand. I hadn't heard the boom of displaced air, which meant that he'd somehow been hiding in plain sight.
We stared at each other for a moment.
He looked- tired. I wanted to go to him, grab hold of him, so he couldn't vanish on me again, but I was suddenly fearful. It had been a year after all...
"Come out of the water, please?"
I did as he asked, walking across the wet sand to reach him, searching for something to say.
I was angry- I wanted to yell at him for toying with me like this.
I was upset- why had he been gone so long?
I was happy- he was alive.
I was worried- what had he been doing all this time?
"I'm sorry," he said softly. "I didn't know what else to do- how to stop you..."
"You just had to say stop." Pointless to go into the reasons. I'm sure he knew them already.
"I didn't want you to see me," he looked shamefaced. "The water was the only thing I hadn't thought of... I thought you'd get discouraged and go home."
My chest hurt when he said that, and the question tumbled out before I could stop it. "Why didn't you want to see me?"
I wanted to take it back the moment I said it. What if he said that he had made a mistake all those months ago? What if he'd found someone else?
"Because... I'm not safe yet." Heero looked at his feet. "I left because I had to- you were scared of me, I didn't know what I was capable of... I didn't want to hurt you..."
"Heero!" I protested. He looked up and smiled briefly.
"I know- you would've stayed anyway. Scared or not."
"I wasn't scared, it was just that moment..." I tried.
"You were." He insisted. "I couldn't do it, I couldn't stay, knowing that you were scared, knowing that I might hurt you, knowing that I was frightening you." He sighed. "I couldn't do that to you. So I went to G."
Just as Quatre had suspected. "So that's why he didn't meet me."
"Yes. He told me that he couldn't reverse the process, only J could- if it could be reversed at all. He offered to let me use his facility to practice in, helped me get my abilities under control."
"What about J?"
"G wanted him freed. That was his price." Heero sighed. "I didn't know you were looking for me until two months ago- I saw you on L1..."
"Why didn't you..."
"I couldn't! Duo, I'm better than I was, but I still don't have complete control. My power escapes me at times. I pick up thoughts, or break things... G's been injured several times- and I nearly killed J... it wouldn't be safe for you!"
He ran his fingers through his hair. "I thought you were still here- the only thing I could keep an eye on was the apartment records. I knew you had set up the traps around the Preventers network and your own accounts so I watched the lease.
"It wasn't until I saw you- you were in a coffee house downtown- I saw you through a window... I wanted to go in, I was going to go in, until..." He stopped for a moment, shaking his head. "I lost control- and read your thoughts. I knew what you were planning to come back here and do after you looked through the colonies again... I had to stop you..."
"Then why not just come and talk to me? Why all this?" I gestured towards the ocean and my discarded weapons.
"I was afraid..." he said, so softly I nearly didn't hear him. "I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to leave you again..."
I opened my mouth to tell him that I had no plans to let him out of my sight ever again, but he wasn't finished.
"And I'm afraid that my control will never be good enough... that I'll never be able to come back, and so I want you to move on- find someone else, be happy..."
"Idiot," I told him, reaching out and pulling him into a hug. He resisted for a moment, but I didn't let go. He sighed and relaxed against me.
"Duo, I'm not safe."
"I don't care."
"I could hurt you."
"More than you already have? I doubt it." He flinched. Okay, so that was a low blow, but I didn't care. He was not going to waltz back out of my life.
He pushed himself out of my arms and shook his head. "Duo, I'm... I'm not human anymore. I'm a freak..."
"And you think I'd love you less? It's not your fault..."
"It was my fault." Heero closed his eyes. "I knew J was in that factory, I knew what he was experimenting on. I made Une send me in because I wanted to be the one to take him out... and I failed. I let him do this to me, I wasn't strong enough to stop him. He was the one who set the tranqs. He wanted the Preventers to come in. It was all a trap to get to me, and after he caught me, he was hoping to catch all of the other pilots. The tranqs went off too early..."
That fucking bastard. "It's still not your fault."
"I have to stay with them now. G's been very helpful, but he can't watch J all the time. Only I can do that."
"Why don't you just kill him?"
"Because someday he might figure out how to cure me." Heero brushed his fingers over my cheek again. "I'm sorry Duo. I want to be with you... I want- I want things to be like they were for that half-hour on our couch... but they can't."
"Only because you can't accept that they could be!" I snapped. "I could help you too! I wouldn't mind keeping an eye on that fucking psycho if it meant I could be with you. I don't care that your control isn't perfect, I don't care that you could hurt me- I know you don't want to, and that's enough for me."
He kissed me.
"It's not enough for me. I'm sorry..." he murmured against my mouth, and before I could grab onto him, he stepped out of my arms and vanished with a boom of displaced air.
For a moment, I considered turning around and just throwing myself into the ocean.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. It was not going to end like this.
So, Heero worried about hurting me. He thought he was a freak. He considered himself responsible for Dr J. All those things stood in my way.
Easy enough to deal with. Heero had slipped up and given me a clue.
I retrieved my boots and headed back towards the bus station. I had a shuttle to catch.
~*~
I waited in the coffee house, like I had every day for the past three. Two more tries after this, and I'd have to consider something else. I had left a message at the old drop off spot here on L1. I just had to hope that it worked.
My patience was rewarded, when a familiar looking figure entered the coffee house and looked my way with a grin.
"Duo, my dear boy," G smiled as he sat down across from me. "I've been waiting to hear from you."
"You know I talked with Heero?"
"Oh yes," G nodded. "He told me all about it when he got back. I do hope you don't think I'm the one that discouraged him from bringing you home, so to speak."
"No, his own guilt did that."
G shrugged. "To be fair, he has lost control very badly several times- usually while talking to J. It can be very scary, and I do see his concern."
"And yet here you are anyway."
"You left me such an interesting note, Duo, how could I refuse?" He grinned. "I would've come sooner, but I had to wait for Heero to leave again."
"Where was he going?"
"To check up on you, actually. Hope you didn't leave too much of a trail behind you."
I shook my head. "I never do. He's checking up on me?"
"Yes. Ever since he saw you in this coffee shop he's gone to check up on you several times." G shook his head. "You drove that poor man insane. I have no idea how- I never thought you were that good looking."
"Feeling's mutual, doc." I frowned. "I never saw him..."
"You wouldn't. We managed to teach him how to 'project' an image around himself. He can look like anyone he wants, as long as he concentrates. He's talked to you several times like that."
What? He... wait... the man on the bus! I sighed and wondered how many other times Heero had talked to me. Then a thought occurred to me and I gave the doc a suspicious glance. He rolled his eyes at me.
"Like I'd tell you about it if I was him."
"Maybe, maybe not."
He snorted. "What did you want to see me about? I assume it has something to do with Heero?"
"I want to be able to stay with him, doc, and not have him be scared or worried."
G's expression changed. He looked almost sad. "Duo, I'd love to be able to help you, believe me. But I don't think that's possible. The only thing that would work would be a cure, and though I know J holds it over Heero's head, I don't think his condition is reversible. It changed his DNA."
"Doc," I leaned over the table. "You said you were doing research too, right? Nearly the same kind of stuff as J was?"
"I wasn't experimenting like he was, but sort of, yes," he nodded.
"Wouldn't you like a test subject?"
His eyes widened. I had managed to surprise him.
"Oh... I see." He said after a moment. "Well, that would solve Heero's issues. But... I wasn't working on exactly the same kinds of things J was. What I've been researching would be a hell of a lot more painful... and I don't know enough about what J did to repeat that experiment."
"Would it be survivable?"
"For you? I think so."
"Then I'll do it."
"You really care for him that much?" G shook his head. "Never mind, of course you do. Love makes people stupid, and this is the most idiotic thing I've ever heard of."
"Then you'll do it?"
"Of course! If-" he held up a finger, "you do a little job for me first. You know... one of my special ones..."
"Already done." I whipped the packet out of my pocket and put it on the table. "All brand new," I added and hid my shiver.
G opened a corner of the package and grinned at the contents. "Wonderful! Perfect!"
"Just don't tell me when you're watching them, okay?"
"Don't be a prude Duo. There's nothing wrong with a little porn."
"There is when I have to think about you watching it."
~*~
G was right. It hurt worse than anything I could imagine. His research was different than J's, a bit more practical if you asked me, but then it always had been.
Luckily, Heero was out of the way, looking for me, for the couple of weeks it took for G to do his thing. There was no way I could've hidden from him in that complex. G said he had a range of about a half-mile.
I never saw J. G kept him locked up somewhere in the building, and he decided that it would be a good idea to keep me away from him for the moment.
I wasn't too worried. I'd find him eventually and we'd have another little talk.
The afternoon that Heero returned, I was resting in the small bunkroom that G had given to me. Hell if I knew where he had gotten the money to build or buy the medical complex he was doing all of this stuff in. As a Preventer, I should've been concerned, I guess, but since I was benefiting from it that would've been hypocritical.
Heero exploded into my room. Literally. The boom as the air was shifted rattled the windows. Guess his control was faltering a bit.
"What are you doing here?" He demanded. "You were supposed to be home! The others are worried! Une's put out a missing persons report!"
"I'm here because this is where you are." I told him, not moving from my position on the bunk.
"Duo!" He sat down beside me on the bed. "I told you- I'm not safe!"
I grabbed his shoulders and flipped him, pressing him against the bunk with my body weight.
"So?"
"I might hurt you!"
"I doubt it." I smiled. "G just spent quite a bit of time making sure that I'm hard to hurt."
Heero's eyes widened.
"Duo! No... you didn't..."
"Yes, I did." I put my forehead against his. "It was the only way I could think of to make you feel better about being with me."
I saw the guilt well up in his expression. "Duo-"
"No. This was my choice. You showed me what you could do and told me that I could find someone else. I wanted to be with you. I've only ever wanted to be with you. If this is what I had to do to be with you, then it was well worth it."
I kissed him then, hoping he'd realize it was futile to argue with me anymore.
"Stubborn jerk." He said when I let him.
"You just now figured that out?" I kissed him again.
"No, I knew it before. I should've realized..." I smacked his head lightly.
"Stop that. My choice, remember?"
He lifted his head up and kissed me. "I can't believe you did this..."
"Why not? You said yourself that I'm a stubborn jerk. You didn't think I'd let you go once you let me get a hold of you?"
His mouth curved in a faint smile. "I guess I should've known better." The guilt was still there in the back of his eyes, but I had taken out all of his arguments, soothed his fears. I relaxed. He wasn't going to try and drive me away anymore.
"Yes, you should've," I agreed and let him pull me down into another kiss.
"So," he asked a bit later. "Are you like me now?"
I shook my head and kissed his shoulder. "Nope. G had his own experiment he wanted to run." I lifted my hand in the air and let my claws slip out of the back of my hand, the gundanium glinting in the light. It stung, but the cuts healed fast enough. "Leftover from the gundanium that's encasing my skeleton now. Impressive, don't you think?"
Heero inhaled sharply. "Do I want to know how he did that?"
"No."
He glared at me. "What else?"
"I heal fast- he had to do that first." I let the claws slide back into my hand. "I wanted wings to go with the claws, but he wasn't sure how to do that yet. He said later."
"Never is more like it," Heero muttered.
"So," I smiled for him. "G and I have been talking, and he thinks we need to set up a little business, do good works, that kind of thing."
Heero lifted an eyebrow. "Good works?"
"Of course." I replied. "He and I both agree that with great power comes great responsibility. We can't just sit back and do nothing."
Heero nodded. "Agreed. But- where do we start?"
I slid my arms around him. "We'll figure it out tomorrow." I kissed him thoroughly. "We have some catching up to do tonight."
OWARI
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