Secrets and Lies Part 6
Heero's son, Sasame was, as to be expected, not quite human. It had been nothing short of a miracle that he had survived and recovered after the birth. But Heero had known it had been for him. He had been drifting off leaving the tortured confines of his body when he had heard that cry. In that instant he had known he would do anything to stay. He was the only one left to protect their child. His body had responded to his need to survive.
When he had to return to the world, outside the safety of the lab and donned the perfect soldier mask again, Sasame was put into suspended animation. He had tried to use a foster family at first, but Sasame had refused to accept anyone else's care. So, as often as he could, Heero spent anytime possible at the base instead of the safe houses, it made it easier to ignore Duo. It was hard to lie in bed at night, longing for your love's touch when you were too busy trying to put a fussy baby to sleep. The lab was where he returned after the war ended and began to heal his lonely heart. But Siberia was nowhere to raise a child, so he had begun searching for a new home when the Mariemeia revolution had happened. He had no choice but to leave his son and fight again. He refused to let his son grow up in the strife of war.
He had thought not having Duo was painful, but it was nothing compared to finding out he had moved in with that Hilde chick. Quatre had felt his pain and tried to reassure him that the two were just roommates. Being pitied didn't help. After when Quatre had approached him to say the four G-boys had decided to move in together on one of his estates, Heero had refused. He had realized then the only way for him to heal would be to let go of everything in his past. He had returned to his son happier then ever, and began to search for their future. He found a nice small two-bedroom in Nerima that was perfect to begin in. He had begun to smile again. Until that day.
*****
Sasame was laughing as he looked up at his father, his sparkling cobalt eyes were a deeper shade of violet then Duo's, their edges were lined with the thinnest ring of navy. His skin was as perfect porcelain fine as Heero's, and he was small statured for his age too, like his Japanese parent. He also had his same high cheekbones and rosebud lips. But his sweet outgoing personality was all Duo's, just like the long braid his father kept his chestnut hair in. He knew all about his other daddy. There was a picture of the two boys together on his bedside table. It was taken before he was born. Duo had his arm thrown over Heero's shoulders and a huge grin plastered on his face. It was the same grin Sasame saw in the mirror every morning. Heero was scowling at the camera. It always made Sasame laugh. He had never seen Heero scowl in real life so he was convinced it was all a joke.
The week before they were to move into their new house, it happened. Sasame had told Heero he wanted to meet his other daddy once. Heero had tried everything even arranging their meeting without Duo finding out who Sasame was. He knew that it was wrong to keep the two apart, he was just so scared. He knew once Duo found out the truth, he would take Sasame away from him. No matter how he tried, what kind of parent was a twenty-year-old ex-soldier with no job or legal source of income? Just because Duo was living with the other guys didn't mean he had broken it off with Hilde. He could offer Sasame a 'traditional' family with two parents and maybe even future siblings. Heero couldn't. Well sure he could always marry some unsuspecting girl, but still, after all these years and all that pain, he couldn't tolerate the thought of anyone but Duo touching him ever.
But Sasame was adamant and just as stubborn as Heero. He stopped eating in protest and Heero had given in. After packing their merger belongings, Heero got two tickets to where he knew the pilots were currently residing. He checked into a hotel for the night and tried to get a good night sleep. He ended up crying instead. This might just be his last night with his precious son. Leaving Sasame with the Hotel Daycare he took a cab to an address he had memorized a long time ago.
*****
He had saved the world twice. He had self-destructed without flinching countless times. But nothing frightened him half as much as what he had to do today. It scared him enough to run, but the memory of the look in his beloved Sasame's cobalt eyes was enough to make him stay. He was starting his life anew, but he owed it to his son to try this. He owed it to Duo to try this. Then he would be able to disappear and raise his son in the peace that he had fought so hard for.
It's just how did you explain to your best friend a deception this deep? Sometimes lies were easier to live with. It was likely that Duo wouldn't even believe him.
Lifting his hand he knocked on the door. He just didn't know how he would explain to someone who didn't even remember kissing him they had a child together.
TBC...
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