Operation: Lost Boys Part 8
The next day, Trowa was lounging in the library reading when Catherine found him. She cleared her throat so she wouldn't startle him.
Trowa glanced up. "Cathy." He could see that she had something on her mind, so he placed a bookmark in the book and closed it. He stood up while placing the book on a table. A twinge of concern made itself known in his heart at the expression on his adopted sister's face. Concern and... fear. "What is it?"
"I need to talk to you about something." She gazed at him. "Trowa... do you know anything of your real family?"
Trowa frowned and shook his head. "No. I don't even know what my name is. Before I took on the name of Trowa Barton, I was known as No Name. Why do you ask?" He didn't like to think of his past, all those bad memories. Why did she have to bring it up?
Catherine almost winced. 'They had to call him No Name?' She searched his face again before taking a breath. She knew better than to mince words with Trowa. He was too wise for that. "Trowa... I have a feeling that you might really be my baby brother, Triton. Sally wants to do a DNA test to be sure."
"Oh." He turned away from her before she could see the hurt in his eyes. He had thought she loved him. Maybe he had been mistaken. "I see."
Catherine swore under her breath. "Look at me!" She grabbed his arm and spun him around, pausing at the pain she saw in his eyes. Without a second thought, she pulled him into a hug, holding him tight whether he liked it or not. "LISTEN to me. Whether I call you Trowa, Triton or No Name... you are my brother, and I love you."
"Then why...?"
Catherine smiled up at him. "It's because you deserve to know who you are! Haven't you ever wanted a name to call your own?" She traced his face. "I really do think you are Triton... but I want to be sure of that. Because if you are really my brother, then I will finally know some peace myself and that's one less scream I'll hear in my nightmares." She sighed in frustration. Why did everything have to be so difficult with him? "Duo found his family. Why can't the same thing happen for you?"
Trowa nodded. "All right... I'll go talk to Sally." His heart felt like lead as he walked out of the room. 'I'm not good enough for her. She wants her REAL brother. Why should a stupid test make any difference to her?' He found Sally spooning some chicken soup into a bowl for Duo. "Sally?"
Sally looked up and blinked. She'd never seen Trowa's expression look so downcast. "Can I help you with something?"
"What do you need for the DNA test that Catherine mentioned?"
Sally frowned in thought. "Well... normally I'd do a blood test, but I don't have the equipment here for that. It CAN be done with some of your hair..." She paused as Trowa reached up and plucked at least a dozen hairs out and held them out to her without so much as a sound. She opted not to comment as she found a clean zip-loc bag and put the strands in. When she looked up again, Trowa was gone.
Trowa didn't even bother to look back as he climbed the stairs to his room. He passed Quatre, who was running down the stairs like a hyper five year old, and sighed sadly. 'Why would anyone want me? I'm nobody! I'm nothing! I don't even have a name to call my own! When the war is over... what good will I be?'
Quatre frowned and looked back. Trowa hadn't even bothered to greet him as he passed. He had been heading to the library to meet him, but it seemed that the plans had suddenly changed. His space heart was telling him something was wrong with his tall love. He climbed the stairs again, wincing as he heard coughing when he passed Duo's door, but feeling relief that his friend was still amongst the living.
"I'm DYING, Heero!" Duo whined, his voice almost childish.
Heero's voice sounded vaguely amused. "You are NOT dying. You have a cold, nothing more. You've never been sick before, so you're miserable. Plus the medicine makes you groggy." There was a pause, then Heero's voice had an affectionate undertone when he spoke. "After what happened... you're lucky it wasn't worse."
"Oh!" Duo's tired voice answered. "Ummm... will you... ummm... hold me while I fall asleep? I know it's silly 'cause I just have a cold, but it'd make me feel better. Please?"
Quatre smiled a little at the silence that was followed by the happy sigh which said Heero had granted Duo's request. Then his attention was returnedto the door to the room he shared with Trowa. He knocked twice.
"Go away!"
Quatre bit his lip, torn between complying and comforting. He took a deep breath. Trowa was hurting, so Quatre chose to comfort. "It's me, Trowa! It's Quatre!" He shifted his weight from one foot to the other nervously. "May I come in?" He knew it was his room too, but he would respect Trowa's wishes if Trowa wanted to be alone. He was about to turn away when he heard a resigned sound.
"Come on in, Quatre."
Quatre opened the door, and made sure to lock it when he closed it again. He didn't want anyone to disturb them. Something was obviously bothering Trowa. "What's wrong, Trowa?" He paused when Trowa stiffened. "Trowa?"
"My name isn't Trowa! I don't have a name! I am NOTHING!" He nearly shouted as he punched his mattress.
Quatre was hurt, not because of Trowa's tone, but at the words he had used. Didn't he think any better of himself? "Do you really believe that? Do you really believe that you're nothing?" He walked over to the bed. "Do you think I would fall in love with nothing?" He reached out to touch the man he loved, and froze when Trowa flinched. He drew his hand back and cradled it as if the rejection had hurt him physically. "Maybe I should leave." He stood up and walked to the door. He froze when he reached the doorknob. His space heart screamed at him to stay. He turned his head around to find that Trowa was staring at him intently. 'I can't leave Trowa now, not when he needs me so badly,' he thought to himself. He pulled his hand away from the doorknob and, once again, walked over to Trowa. Not to be denied by the flinch a second time, he pulled his beloved into an embrace.
Trowa felt his eyes go wide in amazement as Quatre walked back. The burning in his throat wouldn't be denied as the gentle blonde pulled Trowa into his arms. 'Quatre is staying? But why would he care for something so worthless as me?' The embrace was like a balm that made the ache in his heart lessen and vanish, and it washed itself out of him in the form of tears. "Quatre...?"
Quatre closed his eyes and laid his head on Trowa's shoulder as the older boy sobbed. "You AREN'T nothing! You are EVERYTHING! You have no idea how lonely I was before you showed up! Sure I have two dozens sisters... and then there's the Maguanac Core, but there was no one who I wanted to spend my life with until you came along! I had nothing in common with anyone! No one to really talk to..." Quatre sighed as Trowa pulled him close. "I don't care what you're called! You are still you! You're the only one who played music with me... you put your life on the line for me... you saved me from myself." Quatre pulled back to gaze into Trowa's eyes. "You are the oasis in my desert! Without you, I am empty." He smiled lovingly as he caressed Trowa's cheek. "So it really doesn't matter what you're called. As long as you want me, you can consider me your home as I consider you mine!"
Trowa shook his head in amazement. "I don't know what wonderful thing I did to deserve you!"
Quatre's smile transformed into a slight smirk. "You came out of Heavy arms with your hands up."
Trowa sighed and pulled Quatre closer to him. "I love you!" He kissed Quatre gently, loving how Quatre always responded to him.
"And I will always love you. Don't ever leave me." Quatre snuggled into Trowa's arms... content just to be close to him. "Now... tell me what brought this on. I don't like seeing you in pain!"
*****
Outside the door, Catherine paused. She was about to knock on Trowa's door, but thought better of it when she heard pieces of the conversation inside. She suddenly understood what Trowa had been so upset about. He'd trusted her, and she had just betrayed that. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. Then she turned to Duo's room and opened the door.
What she saw nearly made her drop the bowl of soup she was carrying. 'KAWAII!' She placed the bowl next to the bed and smiled at the two boys who were sound asleep. Heero was leaning against the headboard, and he was practically cradling Duo. His head rested against Duo's and he had an almost... contented look on his face. 'So... Sally was right. I wish I had a camera!'
Being careful not to wake them, Catherine pulled a blanket up to cover Duo's shoulders. When Heero's eyes snapped open, she smiled. "So he doesn't get any worse." She nodded to the bowl of soup. "If it cools before he wakes up, there's a whole pot full downstairs in the kitchen." She had tried not to wake Duo by keeping her voice low, but he stirred anyway.
Duo looked around absently. His mind registered things in two word sentences. 'Catherine's here. Heero's warm. So comfy. Want sleep.' He closed his eyes briefly, then the scent of the soup reached his nostrils. He opened his eyes again and looked around again. This time, his fuzzy mind registered the soup bowl.
Catherine stood up. "Bring the bowl down when Duo's finished, Heero. Duo... eat it all."
Heero helped Duo sit up. "Are you hungry?"
Duo nodded. "Yeah... sleepy, too. No one ever warned me that cold medicine will knock you out faster than an OZ tranquilizer."
Heero's lips twitched into a near smile as Duo rubbed his eye to get the sleep out. He'd never admit it, but he had liked holding Duo. "You can go back to sleep after you eat." He disentangled himself and got out of bed. "Are your hands steady enough to hold the bowl? You were trembling earlier."
"'Snot the steadiness." Duo frowned. "My hands jus' don' wanna work right."
Heero sat beside Duo and shrugged. "It's the cold medicine. Here..." He almost smiled as Duo pouted. "I know. Nothing worse than being fed as if you were a baby." Then he smirked. "At least I'm not saying it's a choo choo train!"
Duo's eyes widened and all fuzziness fled his brain for a moment. "Hold it! Did YOU just make a joke?" He beamed at Heero. "You DID! Omigod! I have GOT to write the date down!" He stopped teasing as Heero's expression returned to the normal stoic one. "Oi... Heero? Look... don't do that with me! If you wanna be the ice man around everyone else, that's fine. But I've spent more time with you than Relena has. If this is the first time you've made a joke, then I'm glad I was here to hear it." He smiled at Heero's uncertain expression. "Hey... being human is not a crime, despite whatever Dr. J told ya."
Heero nodded and started feeding Duo. After all... he wasn't about to take Duo's sense of humor for granted after almost losing him the previous afternoon. By the third spoonful, his shoulders were shaking.
Duo blinked as Heero put the bowl down before hiding his face in his hand. "Hey... what's wrong?" He was surprised at the mirth in Heero's eyes. "What? What's so funny?"
"It's just... I wondered how Wufei would react to someone trying to feed him like a three year old! INJUSTICE!" Then he started laughing.
Duo thought about it for a moment, and he started laughing too. His laughter was cut short when he started coughing, but he was still grinning as Heero rubbed his back. Although the rest of the meal was spent in silence, Duo locked away the one moment in his memory. For a brief moment in time, Duo caught a glimpse of the Heero that might have been if there had been no war.
Heero helped get Duo comfortable and made sure he was covered as he dozed off. Heero frowned at the warmth in his heart. His feelings were still a puzzle, but he was slowly managing to piece it together. He picked up the bowl and headed downstairs. When he returned to Duo's room, he smiled at Duo's expression. He looked so much younger when his face wasn't doing those comical expressions. Without thinking, he climbed into the bed next to his friend.
Duo stirred. "Huh? Heero? Wassup?"
"I thought you'd want me to hold you while you slept."
Duo blinked and studied Heero. He saw what he was looking for in Heero's eyes. A small crack had been made in the armor surrounding his heart. If Duo pushed him away now, the crack would be repaired and reinforced. He smiled gently. "You could catch my cold."
Heero shook his head. "I don't care. I didn't care earlier." He pulled Duo into his arms and closed his eyes. The little boy buried within him found an opening before being buried again "Let me stay... please?"
Duo blinked. Heero had sounded like a child afraid of the dark. He rested his head against Heero's chest. 'If taking care of me is what it takes for him to be human again... how can I deny him?' He relaxed and smiled as he closed his eyes. 'Why would I WANT to deny him.'
*****
Harmony bit her lip as she studied the board. She looked across at Wufei, who was watching her. 'I COULD sacrifice my Queen... but no! He could take my King with his pawn once it's Queened.' After a moment more, she sighed and knocked her king over. "It would have been checkmate in three moves."
Wufei reached over and caressed her face. He paused in the middle of the action and pulled back. "You're worried about Duo, so you were distracted."
Harmony chuckled. "So it's Duo now, is it? What happened to calling him Maxwell?"
Wufei grinned a little. "Someone informed me that he and the other pilots would be more comfortable if I called them by their first names. Who am I to argue with the infallible logic?"
At the sound of the doorbell, Harmony looked up and smiled. She stood up and ran to the door. When she threw it open, she found herself in a firm embrace. "MAMA! You're here sooner than I expected! I thought it was going to be another four days!" She suddenly pulled away.
Minuet Lonestar put the bag with wrapped packages down and gazed at her daughter. "Something in your eyes says you have a surprise for me. Will I like it?"
Harmony nodded furiously. "You'll LOVE it!" She started pulling her mother up the stairs. "DUO? DUO... SHE'S HERE!!!"
*****
Upstairs, Heero stiffened slowly. He knew who 'she' was. He and Duo had awakened a short while before, and Heero had decided to play cards with Duo to keep the sick pilot from getting antsy.
Duo looked up from the card game he and Heero were playing. 'She's... HERE?' He glanced at Heero, suddenly nervous. "What if she doesn't like me? I mean... she's been looking for a little kid all this time!"
Heero quirked a quick grin. "Someone who doesn't like you has yet to be born." He had just enough time to clear the cards off the bed. He grinned as Duo started fiddling with his braid in nervousness and decided to stay in the room if he thought Duo needed the morale support. He stood just as the door opened and let his smile vanish.
Minuet was smiling at Harmony's sudden reversion to an excited little girl who had spotted a butterfly. She was confused until she saw the boy in bed... fiddling with his hair. 'Can it be?' She brought her hand to her mouth to hold the cry in. The serious boy beside the bed passed her.
"Don't hurt him."
Minuet met the gaze of the young man. There was protectiveness in those deep blue orbs. "As if I would hurt a child of mine!" She watched as he left the room stiffly.
Harmony sobered... feeling like she should leave the room as well. "I'd better help Wufei put the chess set away." She kissed Duo on the cheek and whispered in his ear. "Remember... don't worry about being a son... just be yourself. That will be more than enough." With that, she walked out of the room.
With everyone else gone, Duo shyly looked up at Harmony's mother... at HIS mother. Without warning, he was caught in a fierce embrace. He blinked at the feeling. He'd only felt this loved once before... in the arms of a nun who had blessed him with her last breath.
Minuet started sobbing. "My poor baby! I'm so sorry!" She closed her eyes in contentment as the boy slowly returned the hug.
As if hugging his mother had been a trigger, Duo started sobbing too. He couldn't count how many times he had wanted his mother. He was slowly aware of her rocking with him.
"Shhh... shhh! It's all right now, sweetie! Mama's here!" She rubbed his back and kissed the top of his head. She looked behind her and smiled at the silent boy who stood in the doorway. She could see a bit of longing in his eyes. She extended one arm in acceptance and invitation.
Heero had heard Duo crying, and had returned to see what had caused the tears. He was torn between accepting the offer or leaving. He'd never known what it was like to have a mother. Even Odin Lowe had been more of an employer than a father. He slowly approached... aware that Duo was watching him, too.
Minuet smiled kindly at the boy as he came near, and it didn't escape her notice that he was hesitating. She had a feeling he was about to run, when her son's soft voice spoke up.
Duo smiled a little. He could see signs of the armor slowly falling apart. He knew Heero expected to be shoved away like an unwanted outcast. "It's okay, Heero."
Heero took the final step and let Duo's mother embrace him with the one arm. It wasn't a familiar feeling, and it made the soldier in him more than a little uncomfortable. The child, however... struggled to the surface.
Minuet chuckled softly at how stiff the silent boy, Heero, was. "As skittish as a badly treated puppy." She frowned when he went even more stiff and hugged him even closer. 'Poor thing! I have a feeling he WAS badly treated.' She gently rubbed his arm. 'Has he ever known what it is to be loved by someone?' She blinked as her son released her.
"Heero needs a hug more than I do." Duo offered his mother a small grin as he settled back down. He had seen Heero stiffen, and he knew that the armor was about to fall away.
Minuet chuckled. "You're just like your father was!" With that, she wrapped her other arm around Heero, noticing that he was trembling. "It's all right. I won't hurt you." She gently pulled him onto her lap and rocked with him... trying to coax the little boy out of the tin soldier in her arms, murmuring soft words to soothe his skittishness away.
Heero cursed inwardly. 'She's already hurting me! Dr. J would have a fit if he knew all his training was being put to the test and was failing miserably!' He fought for control, but... being held by Duo's mother... feeling her acceptance. Before the soldier knew what he was doing, the little boy long since buried resurfaced and took over. 'I want MY mama!' A long forgotten memory flashed before his eyes... sky blue eyes and hair the color of the sunset. A high, keening wail filled his ears... and it wouldn't be until much later when he discovered it had come from him.
Minuet wondered what had caused the dramatic change. One moment she was holding a stiff, silent soldier. The next... she was consoling a wailing child who clung to her and babbled incoherently through his tears. She looked up as the door was opened, and smiled at the three boys who stood there, staring.
Quatre brought his hand to his mouth. "By Allah! Tell me my mind isn't playing tricks on me!"
Trowa gaped at the scene. "Who would have believed it?"
Wufei's eyes were wide. "Heero's... CRYING!"
Minuet smiled at the group. "Hello. Don't worry about him. I think he's been holding this in for far too long." She was cradling the boy in her arms... he was whimpering like the wounded child he had been before all this started. "You poor boy. Life must have been very hard on you for you to become so cold. It's all right now... we'll make sure you're never cold again."
Heero's only answer was to curl closer to the source of warmth. He was unaware that Minuet was now picking him up to carry him into his room. Only one question surged in his mind. 'Why has no one else ever done this?'
TBC...
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