Author: Sunhawk
Pairings: 1+2
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Humor, dialogue fic
Disclaimer: I do not own GW.
We're going to make lemonade. You know... "When life hands you lemons..."? *sigh*
Yeah. Poor Duo. I do feel sorry for him, but if you have to suffer, it makes it easier to think of it as 'fic research'. =__=;
Don't ask me how my week has been...
Stoned Part 1
Chang? Chang, what the hell happened? I heard the mission got scrubbed because of an injury...
Uh... kind of.
Where's Duo? What happened? You never got off the landing pad, how could anybody have gotten hurt?
Calm down, Yuy. Duo is in with Sally...
Duo is the one who got hurt? How? And why the hell are you grinning about it?
He's not exactly 'hurt', per say. It's more of a... condition.
Will you tell me what the hell is going on already?
The mission was scrubbed because a man cannot pilot while doubled over begging to be put out of his misery.
Ok, this is not fucking funny anymore... what's wrong with Duo? Don't make me go through you to...
A kidney stone!
.... What?
Sally is pretty sure Duo has a kidney stone.
And you find this... funny?
I find it hysterical.
You would, Chang.
Sally! What's going on! Is Duo all right?
He'll be fine. I don't think anybody has died from a kidney stone in the last decade or two.
But... doubled over?
Oh, I'm told it's worse than childbirth.
So Maxwell is about to give birth to a bouncing baby... stone?
Shut up, Chang. He's really in that much pain?
Let's put it this way... try to imagine taking a golf ball, covered with spikes, and passing it through a garden hose.
... Spikes?
It's more of a crystal than a stone.
Can you do something for him?
He's down getting a cat scan right now, but I'm sure that's what's going on. Once we see how big the stone is, I'll know if we just need to fill him full of liquids until he passes it, or we have to go in after it.
... Go in?
It's called Ureteroscopic stone removal. We go in through the urethra and bladder and use a tiny laser...
Can we stop talking about this now?
What's the matter, Chang? Not so amusing anymore?
It stopped being amusing right around the golf ball remark...
TBC...
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