Heero's POV
The Wedding Planner Part 35
Priorities
I was lifting weights in the hotel gym when Wufei walked in. "Take a break, Yuy! I brought supper."
I sat up, grabbing for a towel. "What is it this time?"
"Local cuisine. There was a takeout joint a few blocks away."
"Better than hotel food," I shrugged, peering over his shoulder at the brown paper bag with little white cartons inside. "Smells good."
He gave a wolfish grin as we headed for our room. "It is good. The little old lady at the restaurant was eager to give me samples. She insisted I was too thin and needed mothering."
I snorted at the idea of Wufei needing or wanting mothering in any form whatsoever. "Did you deck her?"
His back stiffened at that. "Yuy! We're taught to respect our elders."
"Lucky for her," I replied, trying to steal one of the containers. "If she was young and flirtatious you'd have called her a stupid woman and bought supper somewhere else."
"Of course," he replied promptly, turning sideways so I couldn't reach the food.
We finally made it back to our room and Wufei set the bag down on the bureau. "Go shower, Yuy. I'm not eating with the smell of your sweat hanging in the air."
I gave him a token glare and obeyed, knowing I'd enjoy my supper a lot more being clean and in clothes that weren't damp with sweat.
A little while later I was stretched out on my bed with a paper plate full of an array of food. The television was on some cable channel, where we could actually listen to a news program in English...but it was turned down low enough to be mere background noise.
"So--have you thought about your--problem?" Wufei asked delicately, giving me a sidelong glance as he ate.
"Yes. When I get back home, I'm going to talk to Duo."
"About?"
"Us." I scowled at my plate. "I mean--the possibility of-- Whether he's-- If I even have a chance to--" I rolled onto my back. "Fuck! Why d'you bring this up when I'm trying to eat, 'Fei?"
"It seemed like as good a time as any," he shrugged, fixing a dark, searching gaze on me. "So you're really going to admit how you feel? To him?"
"I'm going to try," I sighed.
"Are you going to call off the engagement?"
"Maybe--after."
I caught a flicker of something in Wufei's face that worried me.
"What?" I demanded.
"Just--is it fair to--string them both along?"
"I'm not stringing anyone along!" I snapped, sitting up so sharply I spilled fried rice across the comforter.
"Well, if you bring Duo into the equation before Relena's out of it, someone's going to be playing the fool...eventually."
"So you think I should break it off with Relena and then go ask Duo out? Is that it?" I asked.
He shrugged, suddenly very absorbed by his container of food.
"And what if he's not interested? What then? I will have broken Relena's heart over a pipe dream."
A suddenly knowing, tranquil look settled on Wufei's stern features. "So, you haven't really finished sorting out your priorities yet. Have you?"
"I--I guess not." Sometimes I hated Wufei's ability to be objective. He was right. If I got involved with Duo while still involved with Relena, it wasn't fair to either of them. But, shit. What about me?
~*~
I don't know how I managed to make it through the week without calling Duo; I wanted to hear his voice so badly I was dialing his number while the plane was still on the runway. All I got was a cheeky answering machine that invited me to "leave a message, and try to be a bit original if you want a ghost of a chance at a callback."
"Duo--it's Heero. I'm--well--when do you want to get dinner? Give me a call, and we'll set it up. And if that's not 'original' enough, tough shit." I knew he'd like that last bit.
Wufei just shook his head.
"What?" I snapped, feeling the tension between my shoulder blades. "Weren't you the one who said I should find out about my--inclinations?"
"Yes--I just wonder if you're taking the right approach. That's all."
"Do you have a better one to suggest?" When he shook his head, I nodded in satisfaction. "Then shut up about it."
When the taxi dropped me at my penthouse, I made a beeline for the phone, hoping there'd be a call back from Duo. What I got instead was a parade of messages from Relena. She went from irritated to accusing to apologetic. But it was her last message that got to me the most.
It rambled on a bit about our bickering, and about how she realized she'd been pretty one-sided about the wedding plans. And then she said that Duo had told her it was probably pre-wedding jitters that were causing the tension between us. He'd said he saw it all the time, and not to worry...that he was sure I cared deeply about her. "It--it was very sweet of him," she said quietly, in a tone that was more vulnerable than usual. "You were right that I was horrid for caring where he was from. He's as terrific as you said. He was so calming and reassuring and supportive. And if he could see that you really love me, then it must really be obvious. He told me I need to look a little harder--and I will. Really. Just, please, call me when you get back, and we'll talk, like you said. Okay?"
Fuck. Just when I'd made up my mind to break the news to Duo that maybe I wasn't as straight as I'd always thought, Relena had to show that spark of maturity and grace that I loved about her. In spite of our up and down relationship, she really was a smart woman. Most of the time she had her act together. I sometimes thought it was all the parties and social functions that brought out the worst in her. The term "party girl" came to mind. She enjoyed public places, crowds, and being the center of attention, while I preferred quiet, intimate dinners, walks in the woods and time to ourselves. Being a decorative accessory to her public persona was a task I frankly despised...but I tolerated it as part of the package deal...a deal that looked less appealing the closer I got to making it permanent.
~*~
It might sound awful, but I didn't call Relena back that night...or even the next day. I just wasn't ready to have a long drawn-out talk with her. There'd be plenty of time for that the following week. I felt like I needed to talk to Duo first, before I had second thoughts.
So I spent my Saturday at the office tying up loose ends, and then went home and tried once again to call Duo.
This time he picked up. And apparently he checked his caller i.d., too. "Hey, Heero! You back in town?"
"Yeah," I said, frustrated by the breathless sound to my voice. "I left you a message yesterday."
"Sorry. I haven't had a chance to check my machine. Did your trip go okay?"
"It did." I really didn't want to waste time talking about my stupid business trip. I wanted to see Duo face to face...to talk to him in person. "Where are you?" I asked, realizing there was an awful lot of background noise and...music?
"You'd never believe me," he sighed. It sounded like he was walking, and then the noise behind him faded just a bit. "Quatre and I got shanghaied to the bachelor party for his sister's fiancé," Duo lamented.
I couldn't help it. I laughed. "Are--are you at a strip club?"
Another heavy sigh. "Yes."
"Male or female?"
"Don't be stupid, Yuy. The guy's marrying Quatre's sister."
"Oh, yeah." I laughed again, this time having more trouble stopping.
"It's not funny."
"Sure it is," I insisted. "The thought of you looking at some hot chick taking her clothes off is downright hilarious." On the heels of that thought came a twinge of jealousy at the way I knew those "hot chicks" would be flirting with my Duo. Oh fuck--when did he become mine?
"You've got a sick sense of humor," Duo muttered sullenly. "Not that I can't appreciate beauty and all, even in the female form. It's just--I'd rather it was y--er, a good-looking guy up there taking it all off, y'know?"
Was that slip of the tongue intentional? And did it mean what I thought it might mean? I'm not a stupid man, despite my recent spate of screw-ups. "Should I rush right over?" I dared to tease.
There was a sharp intake of breath, as if Duo realized I'd caught what he almost said there. "Uh--it'd be kind of hard for you to do that," he managed, recovering quickly. "We're in New York."
"New York? What the hell are you doing clear across the country?" I demanded. "Who goes to New York for a bachelor party?"
"Well, Quat's sister and her fiancé live here," Duo explained. "And my little blonde buddy flew us and his hot bartender out here for the party."
"Shit." That meant there was no way Duo and I would be having dinner tonight.
He apparently misinterpreted my curse. "Yeah, being flown a couple thousand miles just to watch a few well-endowed chicks take off their clothes is seriously messed up," he said wryly. "At least for me."
"I--guess that means dinner's off."
"I'm sorry," he said with what sounded like genuine regret. "How 'bout if I make it up to you when I get back?"
God, yes! We could start with some heavy petting and go from there.
"I'd like that," I said, congratulating myself on not groaning at the thoughts that were finding their way into my totally depraved brain.
He gave a throaty chuckle that made me want to reach through the phone and--well, you get the idea.
"I'd like it too," he said ambiguously. "Quatre's got plans for tomorrow, so it'll be late when we get back out there. And I should catch up on calls Monday. You want to try for Tuesday?"
"Sure."
"Meanwhile--um--I know it's really none of my business, 'Ro. But Relena was pretty bummed while you were gone. Maybe you should do something nice for her."
I gritted my teeth, biting back a scathing reminder that it was indeed none of his business. This was Duo. I couldn't snap at him for offering such well-meaning advice. "Such as?" I asked carefully.
There was a pause, and the background noise faded a bit more, as if he were walking outside. "Whenever Solo and I had a rough spot--whoever wanted to smooth things over planned a day for the other one."
"You and Solo fought?"
"Not often. But when we did, it got pretty heated," he admitted. "There were usually punches thrown."
"No shit?"
"No shit. Hell, we grew up together. Sometimes we were more like feuding brothers than lovers." He drew a deep breath and I could just picture that sad, far-off look he got when he talked about his dead fiancés. "Anyhow, the point is--the best way to get back to where you were before is to spend a day alone together, just doing what the two of you like doing together. And the one who plans it should cater to what their partner enjoys."
I smiled wryly. "Sounds like you had some experience at this."
"With the two guys I picked out--it was unavoidable. I never liked passive men. That's why Quat and I were never right for each other. He's too sweet." Duo sounded rather wistful--as if maybe he wished Quatre had been his type.
"So, you don't like 'sweet' men, hm?"
"Not as lovers," Duo said flatly. "Quat's the best friend I ever had, though. I wouldn't change him for the world." He cleared his throat. "Now to get back to your problem...I think you should play hooky from work and take Relena out for a day. Take her away from all her bullshit obligations, and have some fun. Ya gotta get the spark back in the relationship, buddy."
I gave a pitiful chuckle. "I'm not sure we ever had what you could call a 'spark,' Duo. My relationship with Relena has always been a bit more--formal than that." But you? You're like a whole roomful of sparklers, damn it!
"Just--humor me," Duo said with an almost pained tone to his voice. "I did what you wanted; I resisted Milliardo's charms. And now it's your turn. Trust me on this. I know planning a wedding puts a lot of pressure on a couple, and you and Relena have had more issues than most. I just want to do what I can to help. I--want you to be happy." There was an odd quality to his voice. I could have sworn he was forcing himself to keep talking. "You said you wanted me to be happy, remember? I just want the same for you. I want to see you with the person who'll bring you the most joy out of life."
And what if I find out that's you? "I appreciate that," I said quietly, knowing I'd follow his advice if only to prove I valued his insight. "My boss isn't expecting me back in the office until Tuesday anyway--so I can take Relena out Monday."
"Good. You can tell me how it turned out when we get together Tuesday night."
"Yeah, sure." I sighed, already wondering what I could possibly plan that would entice Relena away from her diplomatic obligations.
Duo must have been clairvoyant, because he seemed to pick up my train of thought with uncanny accuracy. "It doesn't have to be anything outrageous, 'Ro. She'll do it just for your company--not because of what you plan."
"Speaking from experience?"
"Shit, yeah." He gave a soft, truly happy laugh. "Most of the time Solo and I ended up-- Uh, never mind. The main thing was the time spent together."
"You miss him a lot."
"I miss what I had--both with him and with Alex."
"Love?" Shit, that sounded trite.
"Way more than that," he sighed. "I miss the way they made me feel...whole."
I swallowed hard to ease the tightness in my throat. Why the fuck was I thousands of miles away when it sounded like he needed a hug so badly? "Duo--you don't have to--"
"It's okay, 'Ro. Honest. I don't mind talking to you about them. You were the one who reminded me what I'm looking for--what I won't get from a player like Milliardo." There was a momentary pause, and when he spoke again, it sounded like Duo was smirking a bit. "You haven't got any brothers, have you?"
Was that a compliment, or a come-on? It was hard to tell, when I could only assume Duo thought I was straight. But for once I got the nerve to push for an answer. "Is that what you're looking for? Someone like me?" Pleaseohpleaseohplease!
"Yeah--but gay," he said with a chuckle.
Ah. Clearly it was just a compliment. His tone implied he wouldn't bother hitting on a heterosexual man.
"I'm an only child."
He gave an exaggerated sigh. "Just my luck."
I wanted to tell him right then that maybe his luck had changed...that if he'd give me half a chance, I'd try to be everything to him that Solo and Alex had been. But I'd already resolved not to have that conversation on the phone...and definitely not with thousands of miles between us. And besides, how was I supposed to compete with not one, but two ghosts? Worse yet, they were ghosts Duo was still very much in love with. Truth be told, I wasn't sure I could ever be to Duo what they had been.
"'Ro? You still there?" he asked uneasily. "Look--I didn't mean to-- I wasn't coming on to you. Just offering a compliment there. If it bothered you--"
"No!" I said hastily. "That's not it at all, Duo. I wasn't--I didn't think you were--" I fumbled to ease his discomfort. "It was a nice compliment. I was just thinking about how hard it must be for you to find someone even close to being as special as Solo or Alex."
"Oh. Yeah. I guess it's sort of a one-in-a-million chance. But then, you promised to help, didn't you?" The familiar teasing note was back in his voice, and I felt a wave of relief.
"I did. And I will."
"Thanks, 'Ro. You're a good friend."
Right. A friend who has wet dreams about you.
"Will you call me as soon as you get back?" I asked, mentally calculating the hours until he'd return.
"I dunno. It might be pretty late Sunday night."
"Monday morning then."
"You're gonna be playing hooky with your sweetheart, Yuy," he chided.
I nearly slapped my forehead in frustration. "Then leave me a message, okay? I don't even know what I'll be able to plan for Monday. Whatever it is, we'll probably get a late start--Relena likes to sleep in."
He sighed deeply. "You should start your special day with breakfast in bed, y'know. Do I have to think of everything?"
"Apparently," I said dryly. "After all, you're the romantic."
We only talked a few minutes after that, as Duo ran through some more instructions for my "special" day with Relena. Then I heard Quatre's voice chiding Duo for sneaking away from the festivities, and he rather apologetically (and dare I say reluctantly?) said he had to go.
I spent a full five minutes holding the cell phone in my hands as if it were some sort of tangible link to Duo. And then I managed to pull myself together and start making some calls to set up reservations for Monday. I wasn't going to have Duo accusing me of shirking my responsibilities.
I knew Relena loved fine dining; so I made reservations at her favorite restaurant for an early supper. Then I built the rest of the day around that event. I took Duo's suggestion for breakfast in bed, knowing Walter would gladly let me slip in with flowers and food. Then Relena and I could go for a drive up the coast, stopping at a few art and antique shops along the way. I knew she loved jewelry, so I thought I could take her to browse where I'd gotten her engagement ring, and let her pick out an accessory or two. Knowing Relena, it would take hours for her to find the perfect piece of jewelry. By that time, we'd probably be ready for our early supper, and I was lucky enough to be able to purchase tickets on line for La Bohème at a theatre near the restaurant. I wasn't as big an opera fan as Relena, but I could put up with it this once, in order to cap off the day.
All in all, I thought I did pretty well on fairly short notice. I mean, it was already Saturday evening, and I'd managed to put together a day that should both please Relena and reassure her that I cared.
I did care. Really. It wasn't as if being attracted to Duo suddenly shut off my feelings for Relena. I'd just begun to think of them as more platonic than romantic. That's what made the thought of backing out of the engagement so daunting. I honestly didn't want to hurt Relena.
But I also didn't want to ignore the heart-pounding intensity of my feelings for Duo. I needed to know if there was more to love than the steady, structured relationship I had with Relena. The word "passion" came to mind when I thought of Duo, and I thought I knew what had drawn his fiancés to him. He was alight with his emotions--impossible to ignore. And the drowning, euphoric sensation I got around him was too compelling to resist. I needed to know what it meant, and where it could lead, and if he felt it as much as I did.
And I somehow had to bottle all that up and forget about it while I took Relena on an all-day excursion to mend our frazzled relationship.
Well, shit, damn, and--you guessed it--motherfuck!
TBC...
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