Boot Camp Part 18
Confessions and Understanding
Saturday morning started out tense, as Duo was studiously avoiding Trowa, and the auburn-haired boy was characteristically silent and withdrawn. Heero didn't push Trowa to hurry up and apologize, but gave him time to formulate his approach.
It was at the now-weekly ballgame that Trowa finally worked up to it.
Duo and Quatre were between at-bats, and Heero was pitching a near-perfect game when the boy from the circus walked over to his teammates.
"Hey, Quatre...can I talk to Duo alone?" he asked quietly, eyes obscured by his bangs.
Quatre smiled up at him, able to sense his sincerity right away. "Sure, Trowa. I'll go hang out with Jason's team for a while." Duo had introduced the blonde to his friends from the other team, so Quatre felt comfortable watching the game with them while giving his two teammates time alone.
Duo didn't look up as Trowa sat next to him. His knees were drawn up to his chin, and he had his arms looped around them.
Trowa took a deep breath. "I may as well just come out and say it. I'm sorry, Duo. I said things yesterday that you know I didn't mean."
"How am I supposed to know that?" Duo grumped, still irked by the accusations. "I hardly know you at all, Barton."
"Likewise," the other boy pointed out.
Duo raised a somber gaze to his teammate. "I'm not the silent type, Trowa. I tend to let my personality run wild. You know what kind of person I am."
"Yeah, I do."
"And you know damned well I'd never murder anyone."
Trowa nodded.
"But you--I know almost nothing at all about you," Duo pointed out. "You don't share."
The auburn-haired boy sighed. "Well, maybe it's time I did." He settled back, putting his arms out behind him, and his feet stretched out to the front. Maybe if Duo knew why Nanashi was so important, he'd understand Trowa's attachment. "The reason I'm here, at this camp, is because I attacked a cop. I put him in the hospital."
Duo eyed him curiously, sensing there was more to it than that simple statement.
Trowa sighed. This was more talking than he'd done in ages...probably since his walk with Quatre the previous weekend. "Don't you want to know why?"
Duo shrugged, giving him a cheeky little smirk. "He was a cop...that seems reason enough...but do tell."
Trowa relaxed a bit, realizing Duo was close to accepting his apology. "One of the lions got loose. I'd gone after him...he was a toothless old thing...half-blind. One of the new hires left the door ajar while rinsing out his food dishes." He took a deep breath, his face shadowed by his hair, but the pain in his green eyes was obvious. "Triton had gotten just far enough away that someone called the police. I got there first, and was just about to put the leash on him when this dumbass cop..."
"Oh, shit," Duo said quickly, realizing how the story ended before Trowa even said it.
"He told me to get out of the way, and as I was telling him to stop, he went ahead and shot a harmless old animal," Trowa said bitterly. "Emptied a whole clip into him."
"Aw, Jesus, Tro'. That sucks," Duo said sadly, reaching out and putting a hand on the other boy's shoulder without even thinking about it.
"Yeah, well...I just went berserk," Trowa shrugged. "I attacked the cop, and everyone who tried to get me off him." He looked up with tortured eyes. "I told him the lion was no threat...that I had him under control. But the stupid coward just went and did it anyway."
"That's why you were angry about the dog with the sores on his neck here at camp," Duo guessed, shaking his head, and dropping his hand from Trowa's shoulder. "You really are crazy about animals, aren't you?"
"I don't like to see a helpless creature mistreated or abused," Trowa explained. "They don't deserve that. They should be able to trust their caretakers, shouldn't they?"
Duo gave him a reassuring smile. "Yeah, they should. I like Nanashi, too, Tro'. He's a really nice dog."
"Can you understand why I don't want to piss off the warden and lose my kennel privileges?"
"Sure I can," Duo asserted. "But you need to understand why I can't play nice with K."
"I do." Trowa frowned, looking down the hill to see Heero watching the two of them from the ball field. "Maybe it'd be better if you don't come to the kennels..."
"That doesn't seem fair," Duo pointed out.
"I know, but it'd keep you and K. apart."
"Look, Tro', K. already tried to get Quatre to spy on me for him...tell him if I did something that he could use to send me to prison. How do you know he won't do the same with you?"
Trowa shrugged. "I'd say 'no' anyway. So what difference does it make?"
Duo took a deep, frustrated breath, and then an idea came to him. "The difference is, whether you believe it or not, a word from you could get me shipped off to L2. Even if you were lying, K. would act on it." He gave the other boy a frank look. "I don't like anyone having that power over me." That was for damn sure, since he didn't even like Heero's having that kind of leverage. "If I'm supposed to be okay with you hanging out with Kushrenada, you have to give me something in return."
Trowa eyed him questioningly.
"Tell me how the drugs got into your foot locker."
The green eyes widened. "How did you--?" Then Trowa scowled. "Nosey as ever, eh, Maxwell?"
"Don't lecture me, Tro'. Heero's done enough of that. I was wrong and I know it," Duo admitted. "Just give me a straight answer, and then we'll be even."
"You broke into my stuff and I'm supposed to trust you?" Trowa asked warily.
"You're hanging around with my worst enemy," Duo shrugged in response.
Touché.
"I got 'em from one of the other kids," Trowa admitted. "They're for my shoulder. I hurt it awhile ago in a fall, and all the exercise here made it start acting up again."
"They're just pain killers?" Duo asked, a trace of skepticism in his voice.
"Yeah...illegal ones." Trowa looked him squarely in the eyes. "So if you went to Kushrenada, I'm sure you could get me shipped off to L3 in a heartbeat."
"Right...like I'd run squealing to him," Duo drawled snidely. "Your secret's safe with me, Tro'."
"Is that what you needed? Something you could use against me?" Trowa asked coolly.
"No...I needed you to trust me enough to be honest with me," Duo replied. "Yesterday you accused me of murder."
"And I admitted I was wrong."
"I just needed to know you really believe that," Duo asserted quietly.
"I do." A few minutes of silence passed, and then Trowa glanced questioningly at Duo. "Are we okay now?"
The boy from L2 nodded. "Yeah, Tro', we are." He glanced at the other boy out of the corner of his eyes. "Wanna shake hands or something?" he smirked.
Trowa sighed. "If you feel it's necessary."
"A hug would be nicer, but I suppose I'll have to settle," teased the braided boy, holding out a hand.
They shook hands gravely, and went back to watching the game.
Quatre, having watched the pair from his position further down the hill, smiled. When Duo glanced his way, he waved the blonde over to join them.
"All better?" Quatre asked as he settled onto the grass between Trowa and Duo.
"Yeah...we're fine," Duo said, leaning on Quatre's shoulder and looking over his head at Trowa. "Right, Tro'?"
The green eyes went from Duo to Quatre, and narrowed just a fraction. "Sure, Maxwell."
Grinning at the reaction, Duo turned back to the game, lying on his stomach in the grass and squinting against the bright sunshine. He had a perfect view of Heero on the pitcher's mound, and when the team leader reached up to wipe sweat from his brow, and the edge of his shirt rode up to reveal the well-toned stomach, Duo groaned letting his head fall forward onto his crossed arms. It just wasn't fair for Heero to be so damned good-looking.
Quatre heard the sound, and looked over at Duo with a tiny smile. "Enjoying the show, are you?" he said quietly.
"Torture," Duo mumbled into the grass. "Sheer torture."
Heero had kept an eye on his teammates, in between pitches, relieved that they appeared to have settled their differences. Now if he could only get Duo listen to reason and clear up their misunderstanding, he might be able to get his team working as a unit, instead of so many disparate personalities. He noticed that Duo seemed to be asleep, his head down on his forearms, and a faint smile touched the team leader's lips; trust Duo to be able to sleep through a close ballgame.
~*~
The game ended just in time for showers before supper. When they arrived at the mess hall, the four boys of Team Wing were joined at a table by Team Clip, Jason's group. Duo made introductions, although he and Quatre already knew everyone, and the two teams quickly developed an easy camaraderie.
"You pitched a hell of a game, Heero," Jason commented from his seat opposite the chocolate-haired boy.
Heero glanced up with a noncommittal grunt. "Ben had no trouble hitting my pitches."
The boy named Ben grinned smugly. "Yeah, my old man played professional ball, Heero. I practically cut my teeth on a baseball."
"It shows," Heero replied. He glanced aside at Duo, and caught the indigo-eyed boy pushing his food listlessly around on his plate. "Something wrong with your meal, Maxwell?"
Duo looked up quickly. "No...nothing." He looked over and noticed Jason watching the exchange, and a faint flush crept up his cheeks as he dropped his gaze back to his plate.
"You can't live on protein bars and milkbones," Heero said quietly, a faint teasing note in his voice.
This time when Duo looked up, he blundered right into deep Prussian-blue eyes. "I--I know," he stammered, wondering why he suddenly seemed out of breath.
"You need to take better care of yourself," added the team leader, never shifting his intense stare.
Duo knew his blush must be obvious now, and tore his glance away. He tried for a snide tone. "I grew up on the streets, Yuy. Been taking care of myself for years."
Whatever Heero might have said in reply was interrupted as a passerby slammed into the back of his chair.
"Oops," came a sarcastic mutter.
Heero turned in his seat to meet a pair of steel-grey eyes. "Is there a problem, Norton?" he asked in a tone that most sensible people would have been smart enough to fear.
The leader of Team Faction, Kyle Norton, was apparently not 'most sensible people.' "No problem, Yuy, except I think you threw a lot of illegal pitches today."
"Every pitch I threw was within regulations," Heero said stiffly. "So what's this really about?"
Kyle gave an elaborate shrug. "Why does it have to be about something? Maybe I just don't like you." His cold grey eyes shifted to Duo. "And I definitely don't like your little fag teammate."
Duo's eyes lit with anger, and he pushed back his chair.
"Careful!" Quatre warned, putting a hand on Duo's shoulder just in time, as Warden Kushrenada entered the dining hall.
The braided boy had been about to stand up and launch himself at the bully, but the quick gesture by his teammate saved him from what would surely have been a costly mistake.
Kyle sneered in satisfaction. "What? Nothing to say, Maxwell? That'd be a first."
Heero stood up slowly, his smooth motion resembling nothing so much as the supple movement of a big cat. "Norton, you have a big mouth. And so far nothing worth hearing has come out of it. I suggest you move along, before things get--unpleasant."
"Yeah, Norton," Jason spoke up, adding his voice and that of his team to Heero's. "Go make trouble somewhere else."
Kyle looked at Jason with a knowing leer. "Sure, Carroll...I already know how you feel about queers."
The warden had made his way across the room, and was within earshot by this time, turning a studied, curious gaze in their direction. "Is there a problem here?" he inquired, tawny eyes narrowed at Heero and Kyle.
"No, sir," Quatre spoke up quickly, knowing diplomacy wasn't Heero's strong suit. "They were just discussing today's baseball game. It was a close one...pretty tense."
Kyle gave the warden a shrug, looking completely at ease with the authoritarian figure. "Just trading a few taunts, sir. You know how it is." He smiled genially at the tall man.
"I certainly do," Kushrenada replied. His glance traveled the table, sliding past Duo with barely a flicker of acknowledgement. "Keep it civil, boys." He watched Kyle walk back towards his own table, and then continued on his way, pausing by Trowa. "The dog handlers told me you've quite a way with the pups," he commented. "I hope you'll continue spending time at the kennels when you can."
"Absolutely," Trowa said firmly, darting a quick, almost apologetic glance at Duo.
"Good boy," purred the warden, before moving on and continuing his rounds through the mess hall.
Duo made a strangled sound. "Good boy? He talked like you were a dog, Tro'."
The auburn-haired boy shrugged slightly. "Just an expression, Maxwell." His green eyes met the indigo ones, and Duo sighed and nodded. He understood where Trowa was coming from.
"What the hell was Kyle's problem?" Duo asked suddenly, turning to Heero.
The Japanese boy shrugged.
"Kyle's an ass," Jason commented.
"Obviously," Duo growled. "But I hardly know him...what's with the attitude?"
"I struck him out three times," Heero replied, sitting back down to his meal.
Duo looked at his team leader. "Is he that sore of a loser?"
"Apparently."
"But why drag me into it?" Duo demanded. He spared a concerned look at Jason. "There was no cause for him to take a cheap shot at you, either."
"Hell, Duo...more than one person saw me kiss you," Jason replied with a shrug. "People talk."
Duo blushed at the mention of the kiss, glancing at Heero, who was methodically finishing his interrupted meal.
Jason gave a teasing smile. "Maybe you should have slapped my face."
The braided boy glared at him. "It's a little late for that, Jase."
"Besides," Quatre piped up from beside him. "It's none of Kyle's business anyway."
Jason's glance flickered between Duo and Quatre, with a hint of a question, and Duo smirked and shook his head. "Quat and me? Best friends, Jase. Honest."
Trowa looked sharply at him, frowning slightly. Duo kept insisting he never lied. And right at that moment, the boy from L3 hoped it was true.
Meanwhile, Jason had turned his attention back to Heero. "So, team leader to team leader, what do you think of your chances to win this thing?"
Heero looked up from his plate. "Excellent," he said simply.
"Whoa...can you say 'overconfidence'?" Duo blurted out.
The team leader turned to him. "You know our team strengths and weaknesses almost as well as I do, Maxwell. Do you honestly expect us to lose?"
"Well...no. But I wouldn't say it the way you did."
"How then?"
Duo looked helplessly at Jason. "I'd just have said we had as good a chance as any team."
Jason's knowing gaze flickered from Duo to Heero, and he laughed quietly. "Yeah, you guys are gonna kick ass." He stood up, picking up his empty plate and holding out a hand for Heero's. "Here...let me get that for you."
Duo gave him a sharp look, a faint frown creasing his forehead. Oh, hands off the Yuy, Jase! That had better not be flirting going on there.
Heero handed over his plate and favored the other team leader with a polite nod of his head. "Thank you, Jason."
And he's using his first name, too, damn it!
Duo heard a chuckle to his other side, and turned to see Quatre trying to muffle the sound under his hand. "What?" he demanded.
The blonde shook his head. "Not a thing," he assured his friend. He stood up and began gathering the rest of the plates, frowning at the amount of food Duo had left behind.
Duo sighed explosively. "Yeah, I know, Quat. Stop worrying about me."
The others had headed for the door, while Duo and Quatre walked over to put the plates on the designated table.
"When are you going to settle this?" Quatre asked.
"Soon. Promise. I can't take much more," Duo admitted.
"Trowa and I both have visitors tomorrow morning," Quatre said pointedly. "Maybe that would be a good time for you to talk to Heero."
Duo blanched at that. "T-tomorrow?" he stammered uneasily.
"Tomorrow."
Now he knew he'd never get any sleep that night.
~*~
As Quatre and Trowa were getting ready to go to the visitor center the next morning, Heero settled in at the laptop, and Duo fidgeted.
"Maxwell, would you stop pacing and read a book or something?" Heero growled without looking up.
"I don't want to," Duo said petulantly, continuing to move restlessly around the small barracks.
When Quatre went to the door, Duo was at his side in a flash. "I'll walk over with you and Trowa, 'kay?"
"Well, we're heading for the kennel first," Quatre replied. "We have nearly an hour before visitors are allowed."
"Fine, it'll give me a chance to see Nanashi," Duo said with a genuine smile. He glanced at Trowa. "I won't hang around long, Tro', and if K. is there, I'll just head straight back here."
"Be careful," Heero said firmly, this time sparing them a glance. "You don't want to meet up with Kyle or Austin on the way back."
"For Christ's sake, Yuy--!"
"Maxwell, you heard him yesterday. Kyle's got issues. And he's got three teammates."
"We'll walk Duo back before we head for the visitor center," Quatre promised. "We won't let him go alone."
"Argh! This is just plain annoying," Duo grumbled, but he saw there was no arguing about it.
The three boys stepped out into the sunshine, and headed for the kennels. Trowa's long stride took him slightly ahead of the other two, and Quatre edged closer to Duo. "You're gonna talk to Heero, right?"
"Something like that," Duo sighed. What he was going to do involved a little more than talking, but it would settle his debt once and for all...he hoped.
Quatre eyed him warily.
"Relax, Q-man. It'll be fine," Duo assured him, wishing he felt as confident as he sounded.
They were halfway to the kennels when they saw Kushrenada out in the exercise yard, and Duo muttered a curse. "Yeah, I'll head back now...see you two later."
Trowa gave him a grateful look. "Thanks, Duo," he said frankly.
"Any time."
Duo turned around and headed back to the barracks. When he got there, he paused with his hand on the doorknob, taking a deep breath. Well, it's now or never...
~*~
Duo walked into the barracks, firmly closing the door behind him, and thumbing the lock.
Heero looked up from his laptop, frowning at the serious look on the braided boy's face. He raised an eyebrow as Duo stalked purposefully across the room, sitting on the edge of the desk after nudging the computer aside with a hip.
"Got a death wish, Maxwell?" he quipped, straight-faced.
"Let's just say I hate living with something hanging over my head," Duo replied steadily. His indigo eyes met the deep blue ones. "I can't take the suspense any more, Yuy. I can't eat...can't sleep..."
"What do you expect me to do about it?" came the puzzled response.
Duo leaned closer, so his face was mere inches from Heero's. "Get it over with, already!" he demanded. "Whatever you expect--whatever you want--just take it already!" He reached a hand to his shirt, starting to unbutton the collar.
"What are you doing?" Heero demanded, pushing his chair back and standing up.
"Whatever you want!" Duo bit out in exasperation, throwing his arms out to the sides. "For fuck's sake, Yuy! Just tell me an' let me get it over with!"
Heero's mouth opened, but he couldn't find words to say.
Duo stood up, moving closer, eyes questioning. "Seriously, Yuy...you wanna fuck me? Or would you rather have a blow job? Name your price. I said 'anything.' I just didn't think you'd wait 'til Hell froze over to collect." He was still working on the shirt, and when the last button was undone, Heero could see a smooth, tanned chest that led down to slender, flat abs. His throat went dry, and he had to swallow hard before he could talk.
"Duo--no!" he snapped, forcing his gaze back up to the braided boy's face. He could feel the heat of Duo's breath on his lips--and he could see the cold anger in the deep eyes.
"Damn it, Yuy! You can't just keep me hanging. Either take what you want now, or tell the warden I broke the rules and get me hauled off to prison. I don't care anymore!" Duo's voice cracked on the last sentence, and Heero felt a pang of sympathy.
"I don't want to fuck you, Duo--" Not like this, anyway...
"Fine then--" Duo reached for Heero's belt, but the other boy caught his hands, holding them tightly.
"I don't want that, either!" Liar.
Duo eyed him in confusion. "Well what then, Yuy? You've gotta tell me what you expect from me!"
"For starters, you could try being a little less pissed off at me," Heero retorted, releasing Duo's hands, and scowling. "I wasn't the one breaking into people's stuff!"
"Yeah, I know--you're fucking perfect!" Duo spat out in frustration. "Unlike me. I, on the other hand, get caught where I shouldn't be. Frequently." He rubbed a hand across his face, temper cooling slightly. "Look--I just can't function like this--not knowing when you're going to tell me to pay up. Would you please just do whatever it is you want to do? Hit me if you want. Screw me...I just...don't care." His voice trailed off wearily...defeated.
"You don't understand, Duo," Heero said tautly. "I'd never--" He shook his head in frustration, torn between being angry that Duo thought he'd coerce someone into sex, and wanting to reassure his troubled teammate that he respected him too much to ever take advantage of him like that.
"It's okay, Yuy," Duo assured him, taking a step closer, arms slightly open as if making an offer. "Honestly...better you than the first gang to corner me in an L2 prison."
Blue eyes flashed fire, and at the same time Heero marveled at how oblivious Duo was to the fact that he was courting danger. "Gee...how fucking flattering, Maxwell," he sneered, covering his discomfort with sarcasm. He caught hold of Duo's arms just above the elbow, holding him away. "Forgive me if I don't jump into your arms for such a stirring declaration of affection from you!"
Duo blinked in confusion, and then his eyes narrowed. "Well what do you expect?" he snapped back. "You coerce me into a deal like that and you want me to like it?" He jerked free, taking a step back.
"I never fucking coerced you into anything, you dumbass!"
"No? I didn't see a lot of choices out there, Yuy. And like I said, anything was preferable to prison."
"I was never going to tell the warden a goddamned thing!" Heero snapped. "You reached that conclusion all on your own!"
Duo gaped at him. "But you said--"
"No, I didn't!" Heero cut him off. "Think about it, baka! You made that stupid offer...then you asked if I thought you had a chance in prison. I said you were smart enough to survive. Then you assumed that meant I was going to tell the warden. And I said I wouldn't tell."
"But you...you touched my hair...my face..." Duo stammered, frowning in confusion. "It seemed like you were...well...letting me know the price for your silence."
"I was trying to...comfort you," Heero blurted awkwardly. "You looked so hopeless."
"I was," Duo admitted. He shook his head. "But, if that wasn't what you meant, why'd you..?" He stopped in frustration, rubbing his face with a hand. "Damn it, Yuy. I can never read your face. I don't know when you're screwing with me or serious. I said I'd do anything...then you said 'anything' with that very suggestive tone..." He glared at the other boy. "What was that for?"
"I was screwing with you," Heero admitted. "You were so damned embarrassed at being caught calling me a 'blue-eyed hunk' that I was having a little fun at your expense. I guess...maybe I was flirting a little, too...until I realized you were dead serious about it. When I knew you were genuinely scared, I felt...well...bad. I was trying to reassure you that I wouldn't do anything to send you to a place that terrified you." He shrugged. "I guess I did it poorly."
Duo closed his eyes, groaning. "Shit. Why is it that everything I do around you backfires on me, Yuy? I can't win."
"Maybe if you stop looking at it like a game, you won't think in terms of winning or losing," Heero pointed out.
Duo nodded, still unable to look at his teammate. "So...can I safely assume you're not going to rat me out to the warden?"
"Yes, you can," Heero asserted. "And...well...there's no charge for my silence."
"Yeah." Duo managed a weak laugh. "Um...about that. Sorry if I embarrassed you. I should've known you'd never want to..." He stopped, awkward again, and surprised at the pang of disappointment. On some level, he knew he'd wanted Heero to want him--that way. And it was a serious blow to his ego to find he'd been wrong. Wow, conceited much, Maxwell? Thought you were irresistible? Welcome to reality.
"Hey Maxwell," Heero said, interrupting his mental ramblings. "Never say never." He walked away before Duo finished connecting the dots, and disappeared into the bathroom.
By the time the braided boy realized what Heero had actually meant...or at least what he'd said...he was looking at a closed door.
"Well...damn." Duo was more confused than ever. Was that supposed to mean Heero was interested? Or was he just screwing around again? Duo nearly groaned aloud in frustration. And then he remembered Heero saying he had been flirting with him, which sure made it seem like the Japanese boy might feel something for him after all. Rubbing his temples with his knuckles, Duo decided to just give up thinking for a few hours. It seemed to do nothing but get him into trouble.
And as embarrassed as he was at having just thrown himself at the team leader, he decided to make a discrete exit before Heero came back. Hastily buttoning his shirt, he slipped out the door and headed for the kennel at a jog.
He found Quatre waiting halfway between the barracks and the commissary, sitting on the shady bench.
"Thought you were at the kennel..."
"I didn't want to see Kushrenada any more than you did," Quatre admitted. "I decided to come wait for you here. It's a pretty safe place." He gestured to other groups of boys, mostly heading to the visitor center or commissary."So, did you settle your problems with Heero?" he asked, standing and stretching.
"Uh, yeah," Duo said wearily, running a hand back through his bangs.
"And--?"
"And--I made an ass of myself as usual," Duo sighed, falling into step alongside his friend. "It was all a misunderstanding."
"Good...and now it's been cleared up?"
"Yeah."
Quatre glanced at his friend out of the corner of his eyes. "How, exactly, did you clear it up?"
Duo frowned at him. "Why do you ask?"
"Well, your buttons are a little off there," Quatre noted, smirking.
"Shit." Duo hastily began fixing his shirt, making sure the buttons were properly aligned this time. "Don't ask!" he snarled at Quatre's questioning look.
"Wouldn't dream of it."
~*~
When they got to the kennel, Kushrenada was gone and Trowa was playing in the yard with Nanashi and Rusty.
"Hey, how's it going?" Quatre called, stopping at the fence.
"Same as always," shrugged the former acrobat. "Nanashi is quite hopeless when it comes to attack training." He smiled fondly at the big dog, who loped around him in circles, chasing his littermate's tail. "He's just not aggressive."
"That's fine by me," Duo asserted, recalling their brush with the guard dogs outside the perimeter fence. "The nicer the dog, the better."
"Why don't you two come in and help?" Trowa suggested.
Duo grimaced a little. "Last time I messed around in the exercise yard, I ended up on poop detail."
"As a matter of fact," Trowa replied. "There's a rake and scoop over there. I have to pick up after these two."
"I'll help," Quatre volunteered, slipping inside and joining the other boy with the dogs.
Duo sighed, leaning against the fence. "I'll watch," he said firmly.
"What are we watching?" came an amused voice.
The braided boy turned around sharply, blushing as Heero walked up. "I'm watching Tro' and Quat pick up after dogs. I already did my share last time." He wasn't quite able to meet the steady blue eyes.
Heero leaned on the fence next to him, watching the two boys tossing a ball back and forth, while the dogs chased after it in midair. "I don't want you to be embarrassed about our...misunderstanding...Duo."
"Too late for that," muttered the other boy, studiously watching the dogs.
"It's not that I don't...that I'm not..." Heero stopped, realizing that anything he said would be too much of an admission of his feelings. "I can see why you jumped to the conclusion you did," he finally blurted.
"Yeah...I have an ego that won't quit," Duo said bitterly. "Just, let it go, Yuy. Water under the bridge."
"Do you think I respect you less because you made a wrong assumption?"
Duo snorted at that. "Less? What's less than zero, Yuy?" He glanced up fleetingly. "You didn't respect me from the start...how could you respect me less?"
"You are so wrong," Heero sighed. "I've respected you ever since that second run through the obstacle course."
"Well, I guess there was no reason for it before then," Duo conceded. "I made a total fool of myself the first time we met...got mad at you the second and third...and then totally fucked up the obstacle course the next day."
Heero smiled wryly. "And I was an anal prick about it."
"Yeah, you were," Duo said quietly, recalling how much the team leader's scorn had stung. "But maybe you had reason to be. I guess you have a lot riding on this whole 'camp' thing."
"So do you, Maxwell." Heero glanced searchingly at him. "Don't you want to make something of your life?"
Duo gave a bitter laugh. "For fuck's sake, Yuy. I'm an L2 street rat. All the boot camp in the world won't change that."
"The Academy would," Heero insisted.
"You mean the four years of regimentation and routine? How well d'you think I'd handle that, hmm?"
"As well as you're handling boot camp...probably better. It's not as restricted as you seem to think. At the Academy, you'd be free to come and go, outside of class time. You don't have to stay on the base all the time. You'd have more freedom than you realize."
"Not as much as I'd have on my own."
"More," Heero insisted. "Think about it. How free were you when you were living and scrounging on the streets? Was that really what you call freedom? Is that really how you want the rest of your life to be?"
Duo pondered that for a few minutes, frowning. "It's all I know," he said in a near-whisper.
"Is it all you ever want to know?"
Duo looked up sharply, scowling. "Damn it, Heero! Why d'you ask those kinds of questions?"
"What kind?"
"The kind that make me...doubt..." Duo shook his head, looking away. "The kind that make me want more than I'm allowed to have."
"You mean like a future?" Heero pressed, sensing victory.
"Yeah, like that," came the weak answer.
"Someone has needed to ask you those questions for a long time," Heero shrugged. "You've needed to ask them yourself." Weary from doing more talking in one conversation than he'd done for days at a time sometimes, Heero turned and walked away, leaving Duo to his thoughts.
"Hey, Heero--!" called the braided boy.
He glanced over his shoulder questioningly, having regained his stoicism.
"Thanks...for giving me something to think about."
"Hn," Heero replied with a rare smile, continuing back towards the barracks.
TBC...
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