[Fear's a dangerous thing
It can turn your heart black you can trust
It'll take your God filled soul
Fill it with devils and dust]
--- Lyrics from 'Devils and Dust' by Brice Springsteen'
A Silver Lining Part 24
The sex was great.
If there could be anything that Angie could say about her relationship, it was that. Smiling to herself, she pulled the sheets up over her naked body. With a contented hum, she closed her eyes and lied back in her queen-sized bed. The sound of the water running in the shower reminded her that she had not dreamed up the unexpected visit from her... friend with benefits.
There would be time in the future to build the relationship into something more... eventually. There was not any rush. Until then, Angie was more than happy with the occasional meetings and fucks.
Lost in her own blissful thoughts, her eyes opened when the running water in the adjoining bathroom was turned off. As her lover stepped into the bedroom with nothing but a white towel wrapped around his trim waist, Angie sat up. With her black, shoulder-length hair falling around her oval face, she smiled, "Any chance of seeing you again before the weekend, Kent?"
The crew-cut brunette raised an eyebrow and smirked, "You know that I never plan these things. My schedule is too unpredictable to say for certain." With a wink, Kent stated, "But you'll be the first to know the next time I'm in town again."
Satisfied with that, Angie removed the covers and rose form the bed, slowly moving to where her silk negligee had been tossed away the moment they entered her bedroom. Slipping it over her thin body, she replied, "I'll take what I can get."
Kent chuckled deeply behind her, removing the towel from his waist and twisting. Cracking the towel with a sharp snap on her ass, he laughed when she yelped with a startles gasp. "You certainly will," he grinned mischievously when she turned to him with a mock glare.
Angie just rolled her eyes, unable to hide her smile, as she went to slip into her black pants. Without needing the aid of a mirror, she pulled her dark hair into a tidy ponytail with practiced ease. Looking over her shoulder, she slipped into her blouse and asked, "Do you need a ride back to the shuttle port?"
"No. I have a few things I need to take care of before I need to head back," the young man replied, pulling on a black pair of briefs.
With a nod, Angie walked towards the bathroom and announced, "I need to freshen up before I head into work, then." Grinning over her shoulder, the young woman told her lover, "Don't go disappearing on me before I can give you a proper send-off." At that, she closed the bathroom door behind her.
Quickly buttoning his brown pants, Kent turned to the closed bathroom door and waited for the sink water to start as he called, "I wouldn't dream of it." When the faucet was turned on, he slipped his way over to the wooden dresser. Opening the third drawer, he removed the identification card that he knew was always hidden there.
Smirking to himself, he removed a small scanner from his pocket that was no thicker than a couple sheets of paper. With a lock of his lips, the young man scanned the card to store it into the small device's memory.
They certainly were clever, he had to admit. His little visits were only a couple of weeks apart and yet every time the card was different to heighten security. Too bad he was one step ahead of them in their efforts.
Kent heard the sink water turn off and quickly replaced the card into the drawer, covering it as he had been. He just finished closing the dresser and picked up his white blouse when Angie stepped back into the room. The young woman was still smiling when she walked up to him, placing a rough kiss on his lips before pulling back.
Sauntering over to her dresser, Angie recovered the card that she hid there and secured it in her wallet. From there, she went to her closet and took out one of her Preventer blouses. With a hum of content, she slipped her arms in the sleeves and buttoned the front of the shirt up. Looking up to the clock, she sighed, "I better get going if I hope to beat traffic."
Two strong arms wrapped around the dark-haired woman's slender waist. Chuckling deeply, Angie turned and returned the kiss that suddenly fell upon her. When they broke for air, she said, "Make yourself at home here as long as you need before you have to leave."
Giving her lover a wink, she pulled out of his embrace and waved, "Until we meet again." And with that adieu, she stepped from the room, her steps much lighter than they had been the day before her unexpected surprise.
At the sound of the apartment's front door closing, Kent removed the scanner from his pocket. "Thank you for your hospitality, Agent Sleet," he chuckled deeply to himself, the sound rumbling from deep in his chest.
* * * * * *
Heero looked over across the office from where he sat at his desk. It had been one year and two months since he returned back to the Earth following the failed mission that ended up leaving him captured along with his partner-his best friend.
A new thin layer of dust was beginning to line Duo's desk and his belongings. It just made his disappearance all the more real.
Lowering the file that he had been glancing through, Heero rose from his desk and removed a handful dust rags from one of his drawers. Walking over to his partner's desk, he went through his routine of cleaning it. Starting by removing the frames of various sizes, shapes and metals, Heero set everything aside to clear the desktop.
Taking one of the yellow rags, the Japanese pilot began wiping the wooden surface clean. Just as he was about to move to the belongings that he had set aside, the sound of footsteps from the hallway approached the office doorway. When he looked up, he found Wufei leaning against the entrance with his arms folded. The expression on his face was unreadable.
"You heading out for the night?" Heero assumed before returning to his task. Something about this ritual seemed to act as therapy for him, his concentration centered around his work of carefully wiping every trace of dust from his friend's desk.
After a moment of silence, Wufei took a deep breath and pushed off of the doorframe to enter the room. Instead of answering the question, he commented, "I don't know why you see the need to clean his desk like this."
The fact that the Chinese pilot did not refer to Duo by his name - or last name for that matter-somehow struck Heero into realizing that something was wrong. "Duo will appreciate coming back to work at a clean desk."
Wufei looked to the floor before turning his gaze back to his friend and asked quietly, "And what if he doesn't come back?"
His hands stilling in their wiping, Heero looked up through his dark bangs to meet the eyes watching him. So that was why Wufei was not using Duo's name. It was easier to write someone off if they didn't have a name, a connection. Never before had anyone dared suggest that their search for the braided pilot may be futile. This was turf that had not been treaded on before.
Straightening himself, Heero never tore away from the dark eyes that stayed on him. It was his turn to take a deep breath before replying honestly, "That possibility has not entered my mind yet."
The Chinese pilot sighed deeply, running a hand over his dark hair as he turned away. With his back to the other Preventer, he found it easier to say what it was that he needed. "I wish that I thought the same, Yuy," he began. "Six months, I can see a chance in finding him. Hell, ten months, there's a slim possibility. But a year..." The back of his head shook from side to side.
Slowly, Wufei turned back to focus on his friend. "I'm pulling out," he said at last in a firm voice. There was no need to elaborate on what he was referring to.
For a moment, Heero remained still as he watched the other pilot. His expression never changed from its neutral state as he calmly nodded, "I see." He moved to pick up one of Duo's penholder dusted it. "Are any of the others considering the same?" he questioned, never looking up from the item in his hands.
Swallowing hard, Wufei nodded, "A few. Lady Une knows how grim the situation looks. Trowa is becoming doubtful. Quatre and Relena are still holding some hope, but that is beginning to wear."
Finally, his dark eyes narrowing, the Chinese Preventer voice rose and took a desperate tone as he shouted, "There is no shame in giving up now! We did everything we could!" Somehow, the words seemed to be as much of a reassurance for Heero as they were for Wufei in the decision that he had made. Quitting was something that never came easily or him.
Heero replaced the cleaned penholder onto Duo's deck and took up one of the frames. As he continued to dust his partner's belongings, he considered his friend's words. When he spoke, the resolve in his voice remained, "Then if I must, I'll just keep looking on my own." He was not about to allow any doubt to creep in. He was not about to allow the hope that he was holding onto to fall apart.
It was obvious that Wufei had not been expecting that response as his eyes widened, his mouth falling a bit slack. He quickly recovered to sputter in frustration before he was able to yell, "What are you trying to find?
Slamming the frame in his hand onto the desk, Heero fixed him with a heated glare and shouted, "I want answers, Wufei! Even if they're not the answers that I want!"
His voice rung through the air, soon followed by a deafening silence that lasted for a brief eternity. Time simply seemed to stop, as if holding its breath to see what happened next.
"All right, Heero," Wufei nodded at last, one of the few times he ever referred to the other pilot by his first name. A true sign of understanding and respect. "All right," he repeated in a softer voice as his head lowered.
For a brief slip of guard, Heero allowed his saddened frown to show when he lifted the frame that he had thrust onto the desk and inspected it carefully. The relief was clear in his eyes when he saw that it had left the impact unscathed somehow. His unreadable mask went back into place and he resumed his cleaning.
Wufei turned and began to head out the door. Pausing in the entrance a moment, he looked over his shoulder and said quietly, "You know where to find us if you need to talk." He paused before declaring, "Like I said, there would be no shame in letting it go."
Again, it was brought up to reassure the Chinese pilot. Heero realized that, and so he did not retort. He just continued with his dusting. With a deep sigh, Wufei slipped from the office without another word.
Slowly, Heero's arms fell to his sides and he sunk into Duo's seat. "I can't," he whispered to the empty room.
Things were never going to be the same now, he knew that. There would always be an underlining resentment that he would feel towards the others for abandoning Duo. After everything that the braided pilot had done for all of them, to have them walk away from exhausting everything until they had answers was inexcusable. He certainly had no intention of doing the same.
Suddenly, as he sat there at Duo's desk, Heero felt more alone than he ever had in his life.
* * * * * *
Heero moaned deeply as his injured shoulder was massaged deeply following another day of therapy. His eyes closed, his back almost sank deeper into the bed mattress. Duo chuckled deeply, continuing to ease the tension in the recovering right shoulder as he sat up beside the other Preventer. "Feeling good then?" he asked, laughing quietly when his partner nodded enthusiastically without opening his eyes.
There was a companionable silence between the pair for a moment. Reaching over with his good arm, Heero took Duo's hands into his one, squeezing them. Even now, after all of these months, he still needed his reassurances that his best friend really was back. There were nights he feared to wake up to an empty bed, or back in his office and cleaning Duo's desk.
Opening his cobalt eyes, he smiled warmly up to the braided pilot and spoke quietly, "Thank you."
With a shy smile, the American shrugged, "No need for thanks." Appraising the injured shoulder, Duo commented, "Your mobility is coming back pretty quickly." He raided an eyebrow, "No shock there, considering how well your body usually tends to recover."
The smile faded from the braided pilot's face when he looked to his partner's bare chest. Gently, he ran a hand over course scar that ran a few inches just over the waist line of Heero's black shorts. The remains of other scars ran different lengths and angles along the firm chest. "Another close call," Duo sighed deeply, his voice little more than a whisper.
Shaking his head, the long-haired Preventer looked away and over his shoulder to peer out the window behind him. "I'm getting tired of close calls," he commented softly.
As he watched Duo in silence, Heero considered his words. The only reason that Duo had signed with the Preventers was because he had asked him to be his partner. The ex-Wing pilot never even considered whether or not it was something that his friend really wanted to do.
It was because of the fact that Duo was with the Preventers that he was captured by the White Out Organization to begin with. Still, he would never be the one to ask to step down for his own sake. How much more would they have to sacrifice? What more could they sacrifice?
"Hey," Heero urged quietly, sitting up and placing a hand over the other Preventer's arm. When his partner's violet eyes met his own, he smiled slightly, "When this is over... maybe we can see this is the last close calls we have to suffer."
With a sharp gasp, Duo's eyes widened. The fact that Heero was even suggesting what he was suggesting left him questioning that he heard correctly. "You really mean-?" he couldn't even finish his own train of thought, afraid that perhaps he had been dreaming up the offer that he thought his ears picked up.
Slowly, Heero's small smile grew and he nodded to the unspoken question. Lying back on the bed, he kept their gazes locked and frowned, "We've sat by each other's hospital beds too many times over the years. We've had to help each other recover from injuries like this more than either of us have liked. I would be more than willing to lower my sword if it means that we would not have to endure it further."
In hearing himself talk so much and so easily, Heero couldn't help but smile at his own change over the years. He never would have opened himself like this to anyone during the war. The more he thought of the idea of no longer having to continue on with missions and near-misses, the more he actually liked the thought. The last couple of years with the Preventers had helped him make the transition into peace time.
Now it was time to move on.
There was a hint of disbelief still in the violet eyes locked on the Japanese pilot. Heero's grin grew again and he stated, "So, yes, I am suggesting the possibility of leaving the Preventers when this is behind us." Removing his hand from Duo's arm to use his hand to hold up a cautionary finger, he said firmly, "But we'll have time to discuss it more when we take care of the White Out Organization."
It was a struggled for Duo to keep the small tears from stinging his eyes. With a stifled sob of relief, he carefully threw his arms around his partner's neck, refraining from putting pressure on his injured shoulder. "Thank you," he whispered brokenly into Heero's ear. "Thank you so much."
Satisfied that the prospect of living a normal life suited his partner, the ex-Wing gently rubbed his trembling back with warm smile. As relieving as it was that he was able to make the teenager in his arms so happy, there was also a pain in knowing that this was something that Duo wanted to badly, but would not let onto that.
When he pulled back, Duo laughed quietly as he dried his eyes of their unshed tears. He respected Heero's wish not to discuss the matter further. There would be time for that. just knowing that the once stoic teenager was willing to make such a drastic change in his life for both of their sakes was more than enough-even if they did end up staying with the Preventers in the end.
Gently placing a kiss atop Heero's forehead, the American announced, "I'm going to take a shower before dinner." With that, he jumped from the bed and all but ran to their adjoining bathroom.
Still smiling to himself as he watched his partner's happy departure, Heero sat up and rolled his shoulders, taking his time with the right. Sally had been quite satisfied with the improvement in his injury over the last couple of weeks. Rising from the bed, the Japanese pilot bent down to replace his grey T-shirt.
Fully clothed again, Heero stepped downstairs and into just one of the large estate's living rooms. Relena was sitting in a wooden rocking chair, contenting herself with continuing the knitting that she had picked up over the last couple of years. The image of the very pregnant young woman smiling to herself in seeing the tiny sweater that she was making coming together brought a small grin on Heero's own face.
Sitting at the long couch before the flat panel television, Wufei, Trowa and even Quatre were engaged in a playing some video game involving guns and space aliens. Anna was laughing quietly in one of the further corners as she played with Yuuki, the pup enjoying their tug-of-war game with her toys. Scott was nowhere in the room, but that was to be expected, considering how he usually chose to distance himself from everyone.
Looking up from his game, Wufei smirked, "So where is your 'ball and chain'?" A few voices chuckled deeply.
While the comment was just meant in good humor, it was just one of many that had been made over the two weeks by the group since they arrived at their 'safe house.' Had those comments been made to the 'Old Duo', prior to his disappearance, they would have rolled off his back. However, while the braided pilot forced a smile and took it gracefully, Heero knew that his partner was becoming... edgy about having their relationship in such a spotlight.
Really thinking over the course of their newly blossoming relationship, Heero only recalled Duo saying 'I love you' to him once-and that was when he thought he was sleeping in his hospital bed on Quasar.
After facing his hell from the White Out Organization, it was understandable that the American would have his apprehensions in starting a relationship. There were times when kisses and touches became hesitant on Duo's part, even more when those comments started.
It was something that Heero had hoped to discuss with his friends when Duo was not around... No better time than the present, he realized.
Clearing his throat, the Japanese pilot addressed the group, "There is something that I needed to tell all of you." At that announcement, the video game was paused, the knitting was lowered and the dog toys set aside as all eyes turned to him.
Yuuki yelled excitedly when she heard her owner's voice and ran to his feet. Taking a moment to smile down at the puppy as he bent at the waist to pat her furry head, Heero straightened again and met everyone's gaze. "I know that you all mean well when you all joke and poke fun about our relationship," he began, "but if you could please refrain from that around Duo, it would be appreciated."
A few gazes turned wide-eyed. Both Relena and Anna seemed to be the least shocked of the group as they shot their significant others with glares that yelled, 'I told you so!' The three young men on the couch remained stunned before Quatre spoke up at last, insisting, "We didn't mean any harm. It's just... joking is something that Duo always did."
Heero frowned at the statement. They didn't know. None of them knew what Duo had been through at the hands of their enemies, and the trust that had been placed in the ex-Wing pilot in the American's allowing him to know those things was something that he was not about to ruin by telling them the terrible details. They didn't realize... Duo might never be the same again after his nightmare of an experience.
More than not understanding what Duo had gone through, none of their friends would ever truly understand what Heero had gone through. They were not the ones who devoted time to make sure that Duo's desk was clean for his return. They never stayed hours after their shift to continue on with the search for him. While all of these things had been discussed and forgiven, they would never be forgotten. And those were realities that led to a great deal of misjudgments.
Ever since that conversation with Wufei in his office more than a year ago, Heero had been correct in his prediction of how different things would always be between all of them. Forgive but don't forget. There were too many differences between him and the others now to be able to forget if he wanted to.
Shaking his head, the ex-Wing pilot reassured his Arab friend, "I know that you're not intentionally hurting him Quatre. But, Duo's changed. He may smile at your comments, but has he ever retorted with a smart comment back-as he normally would?"
There was a moment of silence as the faces watching him really considered his question. Realization took its hold soon and eyes widened anew. "You're right," Trowa said quietly. "He never has responded the way he used to." There was silence again as those faces turned grim in facing the reality that their friend's ordeal had changed him more than they were even willing to admit.
Biting his lip, Heero took a deep breath before admitting, "There are some subtle changes in him that I have noticed over the last few days. I just... I want this to work out between us." He was not used to being this exposed. But this was important to him. Lowering his gaze, he shifted on his feet in an uncharacteristic show of his unease of being virtually naked before his friends.
Still, Heero did keep back what he truly wanted to add, though the sentiment was not lost to anyone present. 'You all failed me once. Don't let me down in this.'
As she placed her knitting in her lap, Relena smiled warmly and nodded, "Of course, Heero. No more joking of that nature." Anna shared the same smile and nod before the two young women focused glares back on the three pilots on the long couch.
Swallowing hard, Wufei was the first to nod in agreement, soon joined by Quatre and Trowa. With a small smile of sincere gratitude, Heero replied, "Thank you."
Yuuki whined at his feet, stretching the top of her body up his leg in wanting to have her master's attention. Grinning as he patted the top of the dog's head, the Japanese pilot said, "If you'll excuse us." With a gesture of his head to the dog, he led Yuuki to the front door of the estate, the pup's tail wagging happily as she followed him outside for a walk.
Five stunned faces turned to each other. "I don't know what I have to get more accustomed to," Wufei spoke up at last. "Yuy's changes or Maxwell's." His friends all around him nodded in dumbfounded agreement.
* * * * * *
Kent worked tirelessly at his laptop eve since he entered the information that he was able to encrypt the information from Angie's card. Very clever of the Preventers to encode an entry into their database in what appeared to be no more than an access card.
It was a clever disguise that he nearly missed. Had their last leak with the Preventers been killed along with the others, Kent would never have known who had these little cards in their possessions. Too bad that leak was a fool enough to go and destroy one of the few knows residents of the Gundam pilots, ruining their chance to take them out in more subtle ways.
As it turned out, that leak had informed Kent that Angie was one of the few who owned such valuable information. It certainly was a good thing she was so... accessible.
After hours of hacking and looking for the few cracks into the system, Kent smirked to himself when he finally found that his efforts paid off. His laptop had several folders displayed with the large letters in red, 'CLASSIFIED' over the icon of each folder. The cat was getting ready to pounce on the mouse.
"Well now," he sneered to himself. "Let's see where you all have been hiding."
TBC...
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