A Silver Lining Part 15
"And you know what the best part of all? Throughout it all, you can feel death just inches away from you and you want it. You never want something so much in your existence than for that ever present oblivion to take you away. You wait for it, beg for it, pray for it, cry for it to end the suffering." The braided pilot's voice was a near whisper as he concluded, "But it never comes."
Unable to feel his legs, Heero sat atop the long table in the center of the observation room. Finally, he knew the hell that his best friend had endured at the hands of the White Out Organization.
Before hearing first-hand what his life had been like during his two years of captivity, the ex-Wing pilot was too busy trying to help his partner heal to try to fathom what actually had happened to him. Now, he felt as ill as the three captives sitting before Duo looked.
With a look out of the corner of his eye, Heero spotted Lady Une standing stiffly beside him. The Commander's hand was over her mouth as tears coursed down her face. Seeing how pale her face was served as the proof that he had heard every gruesome detail of his partner's torture accurately. Lost in his own thoughts, he missed the quiet pleas coming from the traitors in their begging the braided pilot to stop with his threat.
"I want a name!" Duo shouted in the other room, pounding his fist on the table, causing the three prisoners to jump nearly a whole foot from their seats. Both Heero and Lady were jolted by the scream and emphasizing crash from the American's fist. The tall woman's hand lowered from her mouth from her chest as she quietly caught her breath from her startled state.
Swallowing hard, Heero had to remind himself to breathe. The raging emotions coursing through him, most which were still very new to him, prevented him from being able to have a single, coherent thought. All he could do was keep his cobalt eyes trained on the long braided rope falling along the back facing him.
If he was having this much difficulty coping with what he was now learning, Heero could not even imaging what it was doing to Duo in having to voice his experience-having to go back to that place and time that haunted him.
Somehow, through the haze of everything, Heero nearly missed Brian Hefner's faint whisper, "T-Terry Henderson." Their eyes widening in disbelief, Heero and Lady Une gasped sharply. It was the first deep breath either of them had taken since Duo began his interrogation.
"The name of the person we have been sharing Preventer intelligence with is Terry Henderson." Quickly, the Commander propped a hand on the table while her other took her pen up to write furiously on the small sheet. Swallowing hard again, Heero looked back to watch the stiff back of his partner.
In the other room, Sara and Mark both lowered their heads with their eyes squeezed tightly closed as they silently cried, whimpering to themselves. Brian just continued to stare forward, his shimmering eyes devoid of any emotion, seeming to be lost in his own world.
The braided Preventer kept his heated glare on Hefner, growling, "Is that all? There are no other names?"
Flinching at the harshness in the interrogator's tone, Brian quickly shook his head, "We don't know any other name associated with the White Out Organization." He swallowed hard, casting his pleading and terrified gaze up. "I swear that's all we know," the red-haired prisoner whimpered.
Leaning his legs against the table's edge for support, Duo knew that his act of tenacity was going to be slipping fast. Still wanting to put on an air that he was in control, he continued to glare fiercely down the line of people he once considered allies. Slowly moving his hands behind his back to appear that he was folding them, he smirked darkly, "There. Now that wasn't so hard, was it?"
Heero sat up as he watch Duo's right hand move in three subtle gestures. From their times on missions as Preventers, the two young men came up with some simple hand signals for when they were needed in times when they could not communicate otherwise. The message that the ex-Deathscythe pilot relayed now was simple. 'Help. Needed.'
Instantly, Heero was on his feat, concerned cobalt eyes widened at the realization of how much of a toll this had taken on his best friend. With Lady Une right behind, he moved swiftly to the door. The moment they were in the hall, the tall woman stopped the young pilot with a hand on his shoulder.
"Take him home, Heero," Lady Une told him quietly the moment his eyes met her reddened gaze. "Go out the back way so that the others don't see him in this state. How ever much time you need after this, I'll see that you have it."
Still anxious to get to his friend, Heero nodded with a quiet, "Arigato." Not wanting to waste another second, he pulled the door to the cell open. While Duo kept his heated glare on the three people before him, the captives all sapped their heads to see who was entering.
From where he stood in the doorway, the ex-Wing pilot instantly picked up on how his partner's legs were leaned against the edge of the long table. Moving with long strides, he reached Duo's side to discretely place a hand on the small of his back. His cobalt eyes burned with rage as he stared down to the timid faces watching him. It was almost comical to think of how cocky and defiant these trembling creatures had been just moments ago.
When Lady Une entered, her brown eyes showing no mercy for the captives, she turned to face the braided pilot. Her face softening, she gave a small nod. Knowing that Duo did not want to show any sign of weakness in front of the party that was present, she kept her voice its usual authoritative tone. "Thank you, Agent Phoenix. I'll take over from here."
A small, weak smile tugged at Duo's lips, a silent gesture of appreciation in her understanding. With a firm nod of his own, he waited for Heero's hand to lower from his back before turning. From where they were sitting, the three fallen agents would not have been able to tell how much weight the American was leaning against his partner as they walked side-by-side.
Once the door was closed again, Lady Une turned her fiery glare back to the three individuals at the table. A deep scowl on her face, she took her radio and spoke into the transmitter, "Zechs. Have three sets of shackles ready and meet me in the holding cell."
The response was almost immediate when the tall man's voice replied, "I'll be there in five minutes." When the connection ended, the tall woman hooked the radio back onto her belt, her dark glare never wavering from the terrified group before her.
Biting her lip, Sara dared to turn her frightened, pleading face upward to the tall woman. Her voice trembled along with her body when she began, "C-Commander, I- we-" She was cut off when the brunette snapped her hand up in a motion for her to stop.
"Not. One. Word. Understood?" Lady Une grated out. Sara lowered her head and nodded along with her accomplices. "You are all under arrest," Lady Une stated. Taking a deep breath, the head of the Preventers recited from memory, "You have the right to remain silent. Any thing you say can and will be used against you..."
When the door closed behind them, the intimidating strength and confidence that Duo had displayed just moments ago fell apart in an instant. Paling to a ghostly shade of white, his right hand came up to his mouth quickly with a strangled sound. Quickly, he turned on his heels and ran down the hall to the lavatory.
Throwing the door open, the braided pilot scrambled into the first stall, lifted the lid just as he began to retch, and began to empty the contents of his stomach. With loud heaves, Duo continued to vomit from the great stress that he had just undergone for the sake of finally getting somewhere in the search for his enemies. He had to go back to that place, to that cell, to all of those memories that continued to plague him before he was ready to.
As he began to cough when the last of the materials in him had vacated, Duo felt a gentle hand pulling his braid back as another placed a cool cloth on the back of his neck. He was still panting from the force of his convulsion, the American turned his violet eyes to meet a pair of concerned, cobalt eyes. Somehow, the ex-Wing pilot had carefully maneuvered himself to kneel comfortably beside his friend without Duo even knowing that he was there.
For a moment, the two Preventers just watched each other in silence. Finally, Heero reached forward, brushing the back of his free hand's fingers against a pale cheek. Softly, he asked, "Are you all right?" With a small whimper, tears began to fill Duo's eyes and he nodded. At the desperate look in his partner's eyes, Heero wrapped his arms tightly around him. Sniffling, the braided pilot returned the fierce embrace, burying his face in the other teenager's shoulder.
Heero fought his own private battle with his emotions as he continued to hold the trembling pilot in his arms. Placing a soft kiss atop his best friend's braided head, he pulled back enough so that their eyes met again. "Let's go home," he whispered, amazed at how steady his voice was at that moment. Without hesitating, Duo nodded.
Slowly, the pair rose from their knees, Duo unsteadily tried to straighten himself. Wrapping a supportive arm around his partner's waist, Heero led them out of the stall. After rinsing his mouth at the sink, the braided pilot reached to all but cling to the other pilot's arm as they made their way out through the back stairwells.
When they finally reached their car and took their seats, Duo sagged deeply into the cushioned passenger chair. He didn't think he would have been able to walk much further before having to ask Heero to carry him the rest of the way. His said comrade took his place in the driver's seat and turned to look at him in renewed concern.
Moving cautiously, Heero ran a gentle hand over the other pilot's head. "I'm proud of you," he breathed. Duo's closed eyes snapped open widely as he turned to face him in shock.
With a small, nervous smile, the braided Preventer asked quietly, "Really?" It wasn't until then that the ex-Wing pilot realized that he had never said those words to the young man who had captured his heart.
"Really," Heero nodded, a warm smile on his face. Some of Duo's color returned to his face and his smile grew the smallest bit. Their heads turned to peer out of the windshield as the Japanese Prevented placed the key into the ignition.
* * * * * *
Zechs stepped into the holding cell with the requested shackles just as Lady Une finished reading the convicts their rights. Once Brian, Sara and Mark were restrained, the tall man nodded to two other Preventers standing by in the doorway. With little ease, the two assistants led the prisoners away to be taken to a more secured location. On their way out, the three imposters made sure to keep their heads down as not to instigate any unwanted attention from the tall blonde.
Stepping out into the hall, Lady Une met the anxious faces of the remainder of their group that had been sent away. With a hand pointing to Trowa and Anna, she ordered, "Agent Shroud. Agent Mist. Home now." The pair smiled and nodded, politely leaving without a word.
To the remainder of the group, the Commander revealed the small sheet of paper. "I need two of you to reestablish the security in our communication system. I want the rest of you to use every resource we have disposable to find any alias and connection to Terry Henderson. It's the only name that we have to go on, and I doubt that someone by his likes would go by their actual name."
Sally was the first to step forward, suggestion, "Wufei and I can work on the communication system." With a firm nod behind her, the Chinese pilot gave his silent agreement in accepting the task.
"I will relay the name to Relena as well," Quatre began. "We both have other resources through our connections in politics and enterprises. I have Rashid bring her here once Heero and Duo are back home."
Taking the offered sheet of paper with Henderson's name on it, Noin commented, "The more help, the better." With a smirk to her partner, she asked, "Shall we?" Returning the smug look, Zechs hummed.
"Keep me informed on any and all progress," Lady Une directed. "Meanwhile, I will be following on any possible leads on those transport ships. Since there has not been any news to leak to the heads of the organization, they may assume that we're laying off in our search."
Clearing his throat, Wufei shifted on his feet as he spoke up, "Commander, if I may, how was Duo able to get the name out of them? He was only in there for ten minutes and accomplished something that we had not been able to accomplish after hours of using everything we could think of."
Her brown eyes losing their focus, the tall brunette frowned deeply. "Believe me, Agent Dragon... You don't want to know," she replied in a grave tone. Taking a deep breath, she moved through the small part in the group.
With a mix of shocked and concerned expressions, the Preventers watched their Commander depart. Never before could any of them recall seeing her in such a grim state. Suddenly, any wish to know what had happened in that room had depleted. After a long pause, everyone slowly parted their own ways with their respective partners to see to their tasks.
* * * * * *
Keeping his head lowered as not to have Relena worry over the sight of his reddened eyes, Duo stepped silently into the house behind his partner. "Who's a good puppy?" a familiar voice asked from the living room. Both Preventers shared a look of shock before quickly moving to the doorway. "Who's a good girl?" the deep voice returned.
Relena was in the recliner, chuckling deeply to herself as she continued her knitting of a small, deep green, wool scarf. Meanwhile, Rashid lied on the floor, laughing with that rumbling voice of his and playing with Yuuki. The sight of the giant man rolling around in a playful wrestle with the excited puppy was all too charming. Even Duo couldn't help himself. He began laughing, only causing Heero to join him.
At the sound, Rashid sat up, his face red as a beet. Quickly rising to his feet, he smiled in embarrassment, "Master Heero. Master Duo. Good to see you." Yuuki yelped happily, her wagging tail causing her whole body to move with it, as she ran to the two pilots.
Bending at the knees, Duo scooped up the shaggy pup with a smile that more resembled one of his own natural grins. The sight of it unnerved Heero a bit and he went to shake hands with the tall Arab. After setting Yuuki back down, Duo a one-armed hug in a friendly reunion. "It is good to have you back home, Master Duo," the giant smiled sincerely.
"Thanks. It's good to see you, Rashid," the braided pilot replied quietly. His small smile grew a bit mischievous as he looked down to the puppy at Heero's feet. Again, Rashid blushed in recalling how he had been caught in a less dignified position.
Heero smirked and shook his head, "It's all right, Rashid. That was actually... cute." Three pairs of shocked eyes turned in his direction. His own cobalt eyes widening, he shrugged, "What?"
Rising from her seat after setting her sewing materials away, Relena laughed, "Heero, I don't know what is more endearing- seeing Rashid playing with a puppy or hearing the word 'cute' coming from you." It was Heero's turn to blush. Rashid and Duo began chuckling.
Announcing that Quatre had called and asked for them to meet him at Preventer headquarters, both Relena and Rashid exchanged their good evenings before departing. When the house was theirs again, Heero took hold of his partner's hand and led him into the kitchen. Gently sitting his partner at the small table in the center of the room, the ex-Wing pilot went about making dinner.
When he was finished, Heero set down a large bowl of chick noodle soup and a sleeve of crackers before his partner. At the sight of the meal, Duo frowned deeply, "Heero. I don't think that I'll be able to eat this."
"You need to eat something after losing your nutrients earlier," Heero commented as he sat beside his partner with his own bowl of soup. His friend had not moved to pick up his spoon and it was beginning to concern the Japanese pilot. Their eyes met and he pleaded quietly, a worried frown on his face, "Please. For me."
At that last request, Duo felt his heart begin to ache. Heero was right, after all, even if he did deliver a low blow in enticing him to eat something. He wasn't going to feel any better on an empty stomach. It was bad enough to deal with his demons when he was at his best. Suddenly, the braided pilot's hunger was returning.
Taking up his spoon, Duo blew over the steaming liquid and took a spoonful to his mouth. Heero watched, a relieved smile tugging at his lips before he moved to enjoy his own serving. Yuuki contented herself to lying atop Duo's socked feet as her masters ate in silence.
* * * * * *
After stomaching more than half of his meal, Duo considered himself happy with that and had moved to sit on the swing of the front porch. While it was early in the evening and the sun had already set, the full moon in the clear and star-filled sky was more then enough light to peer out to the ocean. The silvery light reflected off the rolling waves like shimmering fairies dancing on the sea.
Lost in his own thoughts, Duo nearly missed how chilly the breeze was as it drifted off the stretch of sand. He nearly jumped when a blanket fell around his shoulders. When he looked up, Heero smiled down at his friend before scooping him up to wrap him securely, commenting softly, "You're shaking." Duo knew it was not just because of the cold.
When he was wrapped in the warm blanket, Duo was gently pulled to sit in his partner's lap as he settled himself on the swing. Sighing deeply, he closed his eyes and nestled his head on the other pilot's shoulder. It wasn't long before the American's breath evened out as a sign that the exhaustion of the day's events had finally caught up with him.
Heero placed a tender kiss on the braided teenager's forehead, running his free hand over his chestnut hair. Resting his head atop the other Preventer's, he sighed deeply to himself and watched the ocean. He wasn't even aware of how long they had been sitting like that, gently swinging in the breeze, when he dozed off.
* * * * * *
He heard someone crying.
Led by the sounds of the sharp sobs, Heero navigated himself through the dimly lit, steel-walled hallway. On occasion, he had to avoid puddles of blood, urine and other fluids that he did not want to identify at that moment.
Another voice was chuckling deeply, coming from the same direction of the sobbing. His cobalt eyes narrowing, Heero quickened his pace, all the while careful not to make a sound. Passing doors to his left and his right, he focused himself on one of the last doors at the end of the hall, the only one with light peeking out from its cracks.
The soft cries were joined by what sounded like the person pleading something that Heero could not make out. As he reached for his hip, he cursed himself in finding that he did not have a weapon. While every one of his senses screamed at him to turn back for assistance, the desperation in that voice along with the sobs just drove him on. He could always think of a plan of attack when he got there. He was able to kill many people with his bare hands in the past.
Finally, Heero reached the closed door from which the voices were coming. Sweat running down his face, he took a deep breath and kicked in the door. His cobalt eyes widened with a sharp gasp and his legs nearly gave out.
Lying on the floor, his legs restrained over his head and his ankles spread and chained was Duo. Naked. His shimmering, violet eyes widened in horror at the sight of his friend in the doorway. Even though he was gagged, Heero heard the other pilot whimper his name. Unable to breathe, the Japanese Preventer whispered, "D-Duo." His eyes filled with tears and his voice cracked, "I-I'm so sorry."
Standing over Duo was a tall man wearing a long, white coat. The old man turned his bald head to face the intruder, his round glasses shining under the bright light overhead. With a crooked-toothed grin, he revealed the syringe in his hand, chuckling deeply. In the background, four brutes stood in waiting, their lecherous eyes watching the squirming captive. A few of them removed their shirts in preparation. One of them licked his lips, his lust-filled eyes taking in every inch of the body before him.
"Thank you for leaving him behind," the man in the lab coat smirked. "He's proved to be quite... entertaining." His last word was phrased with a deep chuckle. Quickly, he turned and stabbed the needle into Duo's arms. The cry that filled the room was joined by Heero's as blood ran down from his best friend's arm.
* * * * * *
"Duo!" Heero screamed, jolting forward in his sleep, his cobalt eyes opening wide in fear as he sat up. Panting heavily, the ex-Wing pilot took in his surroundings, his head searching around. He was lying on the front porch swing to the house. Not much time must have passed, as the moon was still high and no signs of the sky brightening any further. Running a hand over his face, he was surprised to find it wet from both tears and sweat.
"You kept saying that you were sorry in your sleep," a soft voice said from seemingly nowhere. Startled, Heero looked to find his friend leaning against the patio fence and sitting beside the swing. Somehow, Duo had maneuvered the Japanese pilot to lie on his back at some point during his nightmare.
Still wrapped in the blanket that Heero had secured around him, Duo rose to sit beside his partner, their eyes locked. "You blame yourself for what happened to me," he stated more than asked, his voice still little more than a whisper.
Tears began to fill Heero's cobalt eyes again and he whimpered, "I never should have left you behind, Duo. If I just stayed, regardless of your threat to shoot me, I could have done something to help-" He never got to finish his thoughts when the braided pilot placed a gentle finger on his lips.
Pulling his hand back, Duo leaned forward until their foreheads touched. "You listen to me," he stated quietly, but firmly. "You're the reason that I am still alive right now. You hear me?" Heero swallowed hard but nodded, never breaking the hold their eyes shared. "That promise you had me make to you, the one that I had to wait for you no matter what, is what kept me going the last two years of that hell."
It was all too overwhelming. These feelings were still all too new. Heero just broke down, sobbing as he clung to the other pilot with the last of the strength he had. "I missed you so much, Duo," he cried against Duo's chest. "I can't help but feel responsible for the fact that you were taken away."
Holding his partner tightly, Duo bit his lip as tears filled his own eyes. "Oh, Heero," he whispered. "It would have killed me more if you had to go through that hell. You did everything that you could. I've never doubted that. I would never hold you accountable."
After wiping his eyes, Duo gently lifted his friend's head so their tear-filled eyes met again. With a sad smile, the American gently dried some of Heero's tears with his free hand and said quietly, "I've been so busy fighting my own demons that I never took the time to realize that you've been fighting your own."
Heero shook his head, trying to regain control, growling, "I'm supposed to be the strong one right now. You don't need to have me behaving like this."
"What I need is for you to know that it's okay to share your own things with me, Heero," the braided pilot replied. "It wouldn't be fair of me to ask you to be my rock all the time. The next time that you try to put on a front for my sake, it may take a while, but I'll kick your ass." That earned him a small, weak laugh from the other Preventer as Heero dried his renewed tears from his own eyes.
Kissing the Japanese pilot's forehead, Duo pulled back with a small smile. "A pact to be each other's strength then?" he asked quietly. "You lean on me and I lean on you. We'll help each other heal through this."
Heero took a deep breath and sighed, grinning slightly when he nodded, "A pact." His smile faded a bit and he admitted, "This is not going to be easy for me. I've never... openly needed anyone or anything before. And it will take time before I can let myself off the hook for what happened."
Satisfied, Duo nodded, "Okay. I'm fine with that." There was a long pause between them as they just gazed in each other's eyes. Gently brushing back his best friend's damp and unruly bangs, the American spoke up, "You've done so much for me these last few months. Is there anything I can do for you?"
This was against everything that Heero had been taught. Not only showing this weakness, but ask for help in such a way. Still, he whispered, "Would you just hold me for a while?"
A smile lit his friend's face in a way that it paled the moon's illumination on his features. "Of course," he whispered back.
Laying his back flat on the swing, Duo opened his arms to the ex-Wing pilot. With a deep sigh, Heero lowered himself on top of his partner. Closing his cobalt eyes, and resting the side of his head against the chest below him, he wrapped his arms around Duo's waist as two arms enfolded him.
Lying in each other's arms like that, they fell into a peaceful slumber lulled by the lullaby of the rolling ocean waves.
TBC...
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