I've got it all, but I feel so deprived,
I go up, I come down and I'm emptier inside,
Tell me what is this thing that I feel like I'm missing.
And why can't I let it go?
-Lyrics to (There's Gotta Be) More To Life' performed by Stacie Orrico
That Which Mends Part 11
What hesitation Heero had originally felt over spending some personal time with the Preventers was alleviated when he took a seat at what was deemed their usual table when they were all together. He was welcomed in as though he had been one of them for years, including him in their conversations and sharing some of their more lighthearted stories.
Halfway through their meal, Barton disappeared for a few minutes and reemerged as he weaved through the crowd cradling glasses that were filled to the brim between his two hands. "You have to at least try one shot," Trowa insisted to the counselor as he lowered the drinks onto the round table. "It's kind of our thing for when we're together."
Eyeing the glass that was pushed in front of him, Yuy frowned.
While her teammates continued on in their discussions, the redhead at his left leaned close to the counselor and reassured, "You don't have to do anything you don't want, Heero. We're just trying to include you in some of our traditions, but I can sneak that away if you'd like."
Something about being considered as one of the group to be included for their sociable drink warmed the young scholar. "Thanks, Anna," he smiled sincerely. "It's just a shot. I can handle that much." Downs grinned widely.
Duo took hold of his shot glass and raised it, toasting, "To the newest addition to this sordid lot." Smirking to the stunned student, he declared, "Heero, you've lasted longer in your new position than any of us thought you would."
"And that's not because of any lack of trying on our parts to scare you away," Wufei snickered. "I admit that I'm impressed. Anyone else would have turned and run off by now if they were in your place." The rest of the pack sniggered and nodded.
His own cup lifted into the air, Quatre added, "To Heero and whatever else we all have to look forward to together."
Everyone held their glasses up and cheered as one, "To Heero."
Numb from his surprise over having a series of toasts made in his honor, Yuy was included in their clinking of their cups and threw back the contents of his drink.
Feeling the tingling, almost burning sensation of the clear alcohol he consumed, he slammed his glass back onto the table at the same time as the Preventers around him as they all shook their heads, coughed or let out yells at the shocks to their systems.
"Holy...shit," Wufei managed between clearing his throat.
Quatre wiped at his watering eyes, correcting, "There was nothing holy about that."
Chuckling, Trowa shrugged, "Nothing like a dose of Schnapps to put some hair on your chest."
Her face still wincing, Anna sputtered, "Yea... and everywhere else." Sticking her tongue out, she shuddered off the last of the startling effects.
As the only one who hardly reacted to his shot, Duo snorted, "Amateurs. You're all out of practice ever since you all started settling down in your pair-ups." His counterparts chortled in amusement, holding their tongues from whatever retorts they were running through their minds.
"Is there something wrong with settling down, Maxwell?" Yuy asked, a hint of jest on his lips.
Opening his mouth to reply as he turned to face the psych major, the braided agent immediately shifted gears and laughed.
"Nice try, 'Ro," he said with a wink. "Without turning this into a counseling session, I'll just go on record as simply having no interest in it and leave it at that. I'm still young and choose to live life on my own to the fullest. It's better that way."
Her eyes growing a bit, Agent Fire looked to Barton and Winner as she beamed, "I totally forgot..." With an almost shy glance at her lover, she gazed back at the other couple across from them to announce, "We've been so caught up in the case this week that I never got to tell you I'm moving in with Wufei."
Shooting to his feet, Quatre let out an elated, "Really?! That's fantastic news! Congratulations!" All smiles himself, Trowa rose up so that they could both round the table and hug their friends.
"It's about damned time," Barton muttered to Chang when they pulled apart. The corner of his lip curling up, he added, "Even though we're practically brothers, I still feel inclined to warn you that you better take good care of our girl."
Duo was quick to throw in, "So long as you all know that I've got dibs on his life if he doesn't." Grinning sweetly to the giggling redhead, he kissed her cheek and gave their team leader a nudge. "Anyone who hurts Annie has a date with Shinigami before anyone else."
In spite of the humor in his tone, there was an underlying truth to his words in the harm that he meant to deliver should anyone step out of line with the weapons expert. Heero didn't miss a bit of the menace that lingered beneath the surface of the otherwise jovial agent that he'd spent a night with. And it made a shiver surge down his spine.
More than that, the sentiment confirmed beyond any doubt to the scholar that Maxwell and Downs had indeed been involved once.
How serious they had been was uncertain, but they definitely had an intimacy between them even to that day, though their physical parameters had shifted since Anna was now clearly devoted to Wufei. That dedication was evident in the way she looked at the Chinese agent as she cuddled up to his side when his arm draped around her shoulders.
Still, there was that tinge of irrational jealousy that slinked into Heero's consciousness at the thought of the lovely redhead being with Maxwell on that level. It was almost... annoying to have that odd feeling when there was no reason or excuse to explain it away.
Quick to change his mood, Yuy looked to the braided young man beside him and questioned, "Shinigami? The Japanese god of Death?"
Violet eyes fell on the student as his one-time lover smirked, "Yep. I came across the name in a comic book and liked it enough that I took it on as a nickname and got his weapon of choice tattooed on me. It's how I got my codename."
There was no need for him to reveal his right shoulder blade to the counselor since he had seen the inked marking in full detail... along with every other square inch of the lithe agent's body. Having that piece of the puzzle that made up Duo Maxwell, Heero nodded.
"So when's the big move?" Trowa asked the beaming pair when he and Quatre returned to their seats.
Anna shrugged, "Well, there's some paperwork with my renter that needs to be finalized this week. After that, I should be packed and ready by the end of the week. I actually don't have a lot to my name, so it should only take me and Wufei a couple of days to-"
His eyes growing, Winner cut her off with an insistent, "I don't care if you're a Tsar and are moving a palace full of stuff. We're dropping everything to help, so just tell us when we're meeting at your place." Barton and Maxwell nodded firmly, their own resolve emanating from them.
The redhead's jaw dropped and her eyes began to mist over at their selfless offer. Hopping from her chair in the next blink of an eye, she shot around the table to throw her arms around Trowa and Quatre tightly. Chuckling, her teammates returned the hug and kissed her temples.
"It's what we do," Maxwell declared, a content smile on his face as Downs made her way past him for another firm embrace. "We take care of each other."
Caught up in the display of unconditional love between the tight band of comrades, Heero sat back in silent wonder. Once again, he was taken aback over how a handful of individuals who couldn't be more different from one another could be so unified and unbreakable.
Suddenly feeling a little out of the loop, the scholar was quick of offer, "I'd like to help, too."
Everyone craned their heads around to stare at Yuy as a reminder to just how he new he was to their fold. Gulping, he said, "That is if it's alright, of course."
Wufei was the first to reply kindly, "That's more than alright." His smile widening, his bowed his head and said, "Thank you, Heero."
Rather than try and trust her voice, Anna nearly knocked him from his stool when she spun around and hugged him. Laughing, the psych major automatically held her back while just managing to stay upright.
"This calls for one last round of shots since we have something else to celebrate!" Duo decreed as he climbed to his feet and headed for the bar.
Facing the glowing pair, Yuy stated, "So, the two of you obviously met through work. How long have you actually been together?"
Chang answered, "Six months officially." A lopsided smirk curving his mouth, he peered over to the weapons expert as he went on, "But I was already working for the Preventers when this beautiful creature walked in about three years ago and I've only had eyes for her ever since."
Anna blushed so deeply that her skin almost matched the vibrant hue of her hair. Biting her lip, she snickered and leaned up against his side again. "And you did a good job of keeping that little secret to yourself for long enough."
Lowering the bottle of beer that he had begun to drink from, Agent Wolf coughed from the half-inhaled gulp at her sentiment. "Guilty," he agreed when he was able to catch his breath.
Diligent in his observations as ever, Heero tucked the information he had just acquired away in his mind. He suspected that Chang was fully aware of his partner's past relations with Maxwell. By the team leader's his admission he that hadn't made his feelings for Downs known for some time, he explained why there was no animosity over the past.
Quatre pouted to the weapons specialist, "So does this mean that we can't borrow you for a threesome now and then any more?"
It was Anna's turn to choke on her water when she shot the laughing pair a half-hearted glare while Wufei fought to contain his laughter.
"There was a lot of drinking, raging hormones and some questionable double-dares involved in that once... or twice before, boys," she smiled. Looping her arm through Chang's, she concluded, "Fun as those times were, I've reformed to being a one-guy girl and have been since I started this one."
Heero picked his jaw up before it came unhinged and stared at the redhead. "Um, yea, I was still in the process of finding myself when I enlisted," Downs was fast to share when she met his prussian eyes, her head ducking from embarrassment.
All at once, the mood shifted and her fellow agents sobered at the reminder that they had a new face amongst them. Not one threat was made, but they all fixed the psych major with stern expressions to silently proclaim that they intended to strike in the young woman's defense if needed.
Shaking his head, Yuy told her genuinely, "I'm not judging you, Anna. It's not my job, nor my place." He snorted, "Besides, it's not like I'd have a soap box to grandstand on after my own actions that got me into this situation to begin with."
Their postures easing as though they had been encased in ice that had instantaneously evaporated, the Preventers grinned and the atmosphere relaxed once more.
"Yea, now that you mention that..." Trowa started in, a smirk and an eyebrow lifting his features.
Heero rolled his eyes, declaring, "I don't kiss and tell, Barton."
When Duo returned with the next round of shots, his friends around the table were in hysterics. Anna draped an arm around the scholar's shoulders and winked to him. Under the commotion of the chortles around them, she proclaimed, "Well, it's official. You're gonna fit in just fine, kid."
His mouth spreading into a grin, there was a strange sense of relief that flooded Yuy in hearing that.
* * * * * *
The following morning, Heero couldn't help waking with a small smile when he recalled the prior night before his eyelids began to open. On this first grip on consciousness, he assessed that his head was clear, his stomach was content... and there was no one lying beside him.
Maybe there was something to be said about taking up some personal time with the company of others. Oddly enough, his chosen 'company' happened to be a handful of federal agents as opposed to his peers and classmates...
...and yet he had an undeniable connection that he was beginning to forge with the pack.
Pushing himself up, Yuy looked around his room to take in just how lonely and empty it was for the first time. His smile fading, he sighed.
Spring break was only days away. When that time came, he would be returning to his empty home and his lonely existence. Up until right then, he never would have considered them as such. But now...
His head shaking those thoughts away, Heero forced himself out of bed and changed into his running attire. Nothing like a return into his routine to make him feel better. Everything was as it should be, as he had planned it to be. He had everything he needed and wanted.
There was nothing missing in his life.
* * * * * *
"You should have woken me," Quatre frowned in worry when he found Trowa sitting up in the breakfast nook at the back of their estate. "Was it nightmares?" he asked.
Peering up at the blonde from the window bench that he had been staring through to their spacious garden that was beginning to bud with new life, Barton snickered and shook his head. "Yes, but they weren't the worst I've ever had," he promised. An eyebrow raising, he smirked, "I do need to handle them on my own at times, you know."
Winner ducked his head with a sheepish grin. "Right," he responded. "Sorry." Chewing on the inside of his cheek, he walked up to the window seat as his lover made room so that they could share it comfortably. Quietly sighing in content when a long arm wrapped around his shoulders, he closed his eyes and pillowed the side of his head against the shoulder linked to it.
Giving them some time to just soak in their closeness, Trowa finally broke the quiet to ask, "How was your talk with Heero yesterday?"
Agent Rock gazed up at the handsome face just above him, smiling, "Good." Testing the waters, he added, "You'd get a lot out of sitting with him, if you'd just give it a shot."
The undercover officer chuckled, "I knew you were going to suggest that." Letting out the air from his lungs in a long exhale, he stared through the window once more to consider his next words. "I'll think about it," he muttered.
Quatre beamed. Far from an outright rejection, this was something far better than he had expected from Night. At least there was a chance he might be able to talk to someone better suited to help him through his struggles beyond what his partner and their friends could offer.
What was more, Trowa was never one to give his word without meaning every syllable. He would think it over thoroughly. And whatever conclusion he came to, Winner would be happy with it for that very reason.
Kissing the side of Barton's neck, the Arabian whispered, "Thank you." He was given a squeeze from the arm holding him as a response.
They fell back into a companionable silence as an invisible weight between them lightened.
No relationship was perfect, but theirs had its particular challenges that they continued to overcome. Maybe it was time someone from the outside looking in to help them sort out their own personal battles so that their being together might smooth out the edges.
In the meantime, they were right where they wanted to be... physically and emotionally.
* * * * * *
A couple hours later, it was nearly noon when Wufei stirred back into the world of the living. Groaning when his eyelids cracked open to the assault of brilliant light that flooded his bedroom, he threw an arm over them as a shield until be could get his senses back together... and keep his surroundings from spinning.
It had been a very long time since he had indulged the way he had the night before. Of course, knowing that he wasn't the designated driver for the evening coupled with a few free drinks in celebration of his big news that had been thrown into the mix made it easier for him to forget his limits.
One of the last vivid memories of the night before was of Trowa and Quatre dropping him off at his house since it was on the way to their own. From there, he had locked up, stripped completely down and fallen into bed less than a minute later.
Finally feeling a little steadier, Chang lowered his arm from his face and focused on the white ceiling tile directly over his head as a point of reference to straighten his vision out. He could feel the slight start of a headache, but it was nothing that some fluids and sustenance couldn't cure.
Just as he began to push himself up so that he could hang his legs over the edge of his mattress, the Chinese agent froze stiff at the sound of movement downstairs.
A jolt shot down his spine, pushing him onto his feet. Eyes narrowed, he pulled on the first pair of boxers that he removed from his dresser and set himself into the motion of investigating who or what was in his home without his invitation.
Instinctively, he reached for the loaded revolver beneath his bed.
Armed and aiming ahead of himself, Wufei silently and slowly weaved his way from the bedroom to stalked down the hallway. Once he reached the winding master staircase, he gripped his gun with both hands and descended to the ground floor with a graceful ease, the effects of his last night's drinking no longer a hindrance.
When Agent Wolf was about to second-guess if he had actually heard someone in his house his ears picked up rustling towards the back of his lakeside estate.
His glare hardening, he headed through the corridor to stop just shy of the doorway to the kitchen and dining space where his invader was lurking. He kept back until he could make out the long shadow across the floor for the right moment to strike.
Taking a deep breath to steady himself when the dark casting held still past the opening, Chang spun around the doorpost and pointed the barrel of his revolver at the back of his would-be assailant... only to gasp sharply at the fall of red curls that greeted him.
"Anna?" Wufei cried in shock, his face paling and eyes grew as wide as they could while his arms dropped. Spinning on her heels to face him, the weapons expert blinked widely- first at her lover then at the gun at his side. Mortified, the team lead sputtered, "Anna, I-I'm sorry... I forgot you have a key... if I'd thought of that, I swear, I-"
He was cut off by his smirking partner when she closed the distance between them to kiss him soundly. His enlarged eyes closing as he returned the gesture, he sighed and melted against her.
While the kiss deepened and without breaking it or opening her own eyes, Downs felt for the gun to easily slip it from the other agent's hand and rested it on the counter beside them and their arms wrapped around each other instead.
Breaking apart for air at last, Anna placed a quick peck on the tip of her boyfriend's nose. "It's the first time I ever showed myself in like this," she reassured. "Nothing to be sorry about, especially since we're all a little on edge with this new case. If anything, I should be sorry for showing up like this without at least calling."
"No. This is your home, too," Chang replied, his head shaking and a sad frown still marring his face. "You can come and go as you please." The corner of his mouth curling up, he shrugged, "It just doesn't help that I'm just waking up and sorting myself out after last night."
The redhead snickered, "Yea. That was definitely the most I ever saw you drink in a while." She gestured to the spread of sandwiches, crackers, cheeses, fruits and such that she had laid out on the kitchen prep station. "Which is why I figured I'd make us lunch and get some fluids in you. It's a beautiful day outside, so I thought it'd be nice if we had a picnic for some sun and time together."
Stomach churning at the mere sight of the food displayed, Wufei only then paid attention to how famished he was. That was just like his lover... always looking out for him.
Running a hand through his loose, black hair, he sighed again and met the blue eyes watching him. "I love you," he breathed, his lips spreading into a warm smile.
It was a sentiment so infrequently used between them that it caught Agent Fire up surprise. Her growing eves relaxing, she leaned in for another deep kiss. "I love you, too, Wufei," Anna grinned in kind.
Lightly smacking his arm, she adjusted her yellow cutoff tube top that left little to the imagination with her ample breasts as she urged, "Now go upstairs and get dressed. Short sleeves and shorts are all you'll need. I'll finish up here before you're done."
Chang muttered an affirmative and left his counterpart to her devices as he continued to smile to himself.
* * * * * *
Back in the outskirts of town...
Duo was chalking up another successful conquest.
The last to leave the bar hours before, he found a very willing and eager new 'friend' for the night.
Shuffling into his clothes after he half-fell out of the hotel bed that he had shared with the short-haired young man that was still lying in it, the braided officer didn't even so much as look back at him...
...He didn't want to be reminded of how much the stranger reminded him of a certain blue-eyed counselor. Neither of them wanted anything more than the tussle between the sheets they'd had in their alcohol-hazed mindsets so there was no need to look back on any of their time spent together now.
It was fun while it lasted and now it was over. Simple as that.
Dressed and his personals secured in the pockets of his jeans, the braided young man slipped silently from the room and closed the door behind him. Smirking to himself, he hummed a cheerful tune and took the steps to the side exit of one of the hotels that he had come to know quite well over the years.
As he stepped outside into the brilliant and warm late morning, Maxwell set his sunglasses onto the bridge of his nose. Before long, he was back in his car and hitting the main highway back to his place, feeling more and more himself with each mile he put between himself and his latest bedmate.
For the first time in a week, life was as it should have been. He had his groove back and had every intention of holding onto it.
Shinigami had returned for good.
TBC...
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