The Chibi Problem Part 24
A lot of strange things run through your head when you're in the middle of a situation.
Like, I wasted all those self-defense lessons by being stupid.
And, who the hell does this prick think he is?!
And even, this is a new shirt, damn it!
It takes a lot longer to tell than the actual elapsed time, of course.
Bubba dumped me on the ground and fell on top of me. I heard a commotion from the car and then a variety of shrieks, screeches and thunderous Bad Chibi Noises.
I was trying my best to keep Bubba from getting a good grip on my throat. I managed to bite him at least once, my teeth sinking in a lot farther than I care to remember. He howled and whacked me in the head. Then something whacked him in the head and he flailed his arms about for a few seconds.
I could have gotten away then, I think, if I hadn't been listening to the carillon in my head. I vaguely heard him yelling about "bats!" A burst of light split the darkness, narrowly missing Bubba's nose, and I began to realise that he was under attack.
Chibis, even wild ones, will not willingly attack a human, unless the human is intent on doing harm to the chibits, the nest or their mate. If necessary, they will use force to warn a person away, but never to the point of killing or severely injuring a human. They are more likely to distract and disappear.
I, on the other hand, had no such moral code.
I went for Bubba's eyes with my fingernails, and managed to get out from under him while he was swearing at me and checking to see if his eyeballs were still in their sockets.
I think I intended to scramble into the brush and hide until he either left or Mike arrived. I hadn't reckoned on my bad back and my even worse knee. A muscle spasm hit me before I'd gone three steps, and then Bubba was back.
I heard BabyDoll screaming from somewhere above, but Bubba was yelling right in my ear, one hand full of my shirt and the other one going for my jeans. I struggled, stepped on a rock that caused my ankle to twist and fell into the ditch, Bubba right along with me, dammit. A pale shape fell out of the sky and clipped Bubba's head. He swung his arm and I heard him make contact with something.
I screamed for my chibis to get back, not to let him hurt them. He let go of my shirt and grabbed my throat again and this time things got a little hazy. Another flurry of outside activity; I couldn't tell you what happened or who did it, but it gave me an instant when he had to let go to take another swing.
I shoved and managed to get my knee up, grabbed a rock and hit him in the head as hard as I could. It wasn't very hard; I admit that.
At that point, Bubba stopped being a nice guy, and my BabyDoll crossed the line into Pissed-Off Mommie mode.
I heard the subsonic hum and saw the green glow just as Bubba hit me hard in the ribs. Something cracked, hurting like a sonuvabitch, and I suddenly couldn't breathe. The haze rushed back, red this time, instead of grey, and I could just make out the arc of green, along with the most gawdawful noise I've heard outside of a Siamese queen in heat.
I closed my eyes, just for a minute, I thought.
Then there were lights just all over the place and my chibi was crouched over me, hissing like a cobra. A voice I recognised was yelling, but I couldn't understand the words. Little bundles of heat were scattered about me; it took some effort for me to realise that those little bundles of heat were my chibis, sitting on me protectively.
I need to interject something here. In the telling, it sounds as if I knew what was going on, where I was, all that pertinent information. I didn't; at first. I knew my chibis. I knew who Mike was. I understood that the blue lights meant cops and that the two people in navy blue jumpsuits carrying big toolboxes were paramedics. I just didn't immediately connect all that with me. I had a vague idea that something bad had occurred and that my chibis - good little guys! - had made sure it wasn't worse. And I remembered a large, inbred troglodyte creature in a blue and white striped mechanic's shirt.
My initial comprehension was spotty.
I recognised that a blue light was flashing nearby, as well as some red and yellows. Hey, I thought, cops! Good riddance to bad Bubba.
Baby? I whispered hoarsely and my little doll was right there in my line of sight. He patted my face anxiously, and cooed softly before reeling off a string of chibi-chirps.
He wanted to know what he should do; there were other people there. Mike was there. They wanted to take me somewhere, but he was afraid to let them touch me, after the nasty stinky one had hurt me.
Then I heard Mike from somewhere in the vicinity of my feet.
Call them off! he yelled. They won't let the paramedics get near you and they won't listen to me!
Paramedics? Oh, yeah... I'd fallen into the ditch...
It's okay, I told my BabyDoll. These are okay.
"Shiiiii..." he rumbled and I was aware of the little heat bundles moving carefully.
I counted them automatically and blinked when I came up one short.
What the hell...?
And then people were all around me and it got noisy again.
BabyDoll was still on my shoulder resting against my cheek. He grumbled when he had to move for the placement of an oxygen mask, but came right back as soon as the paramedic withdrew her hand.
Those are some protective birds you've got there, she said.
Not birds, I muttered. Chibis. My gundam.
BabyDoll?
He patted my cheek to let me know he was listening.
Who's missing? Who got hurt?
"Shiniiii omae kuuuuuso!"
Demon had pulled a power dive straight into Bubba's face, taking the hit to allow BabyDoll to launch his scythe attack.
Did that sonuvabitch hurt my chibi?! I exploded. I tried to sit up; someone pushed me back even as my ribs made a screeching protest.
It's okay! exclaimed Mike. He's right here! I think he just had the wind knocked out of him. He's... he's okay...
Wanna see, I demanded, and rolled my eyes to find Demon curled in Mike's hands, his sharp little midnight eyes watching me intently.
Aw, sweetie... You okay?
He nodded and glared at me. "Korosu," he muttered.
BabyDoll smirked and launched into a satisfied synopsis of the Battle of the Bubba. The final score, of course, was Chibis 1: Bubba 0.
I lay there like a good girl and let the medics do their thing, until they started to put me and the gurney into the ambulance.
The woman made a shooing gesture to BabyDoll.
Get off, little guy; we have to go.
BabyDoll emitted a string of screeches, warbles and coos that ended with him wrapped in my hair, refusing to be moved. A smattering of echoing sounds suggested that the rest of the gundam agreed with whatever he had said.
Goin' with, I mumbled. Damn! They must have given me something; the whole world felt spongy and... soft around me.
We can't have animals in the ambulance, the woman said patiently. They'll have to go with your friend.
I got my hand up to touch BabyDoll and he nuzzled my jaw and trilled softly.
"Moooiiiii? Loooiiiii moooiiiii..."
I stroked at his braid and left my hand resting there.
He goes with, I said firmly, or I don't go!
A conference ensued just out of my hearing range; then Mike came to stand beside me.
They said BabyDoll can go with you, since he hasn't gotten in the way so far, but not the others. If you'll tell them it's okay, I'll take them. The cops called for roadside assistance, and the guy will help me get your car on the trailer and then we'll be at the hospital directly. Okay?
I had to think for a minute. That went by almost too fast to process.
Okay... BabyDoll, I whispered, tell the guys to go with Mike for now. The ambulance isn't big enough for all of us.
He chirped and chattered, and got a variety of responses. He was firmer than I could have been; Zee and Happy were keening their concern and Justy and Demon were chibi-cussing a blue streak. BabyDoll drew himself up and reminded them of who was in charge, namely him. And the chastened juveniles clustered together on the hood of Mike's truck.
Mike patted my hand in that awkward way that people do when they want to help but really can't.
I'll make sure they get there all right. Hey, should I feed them?
I started to laugh, but that hurt, so I stifled it.
Yeah, if you feed them, they'll love you. They love Taco Bell.
He grinned at me. Will do, sir. I'll get something for BabyDoll, too.
Then they stuck me into the ambulance and I guess I went to sleep. Or passed out. Could have been either one.
TBC...
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