Author: Merula

Pairings: 1x2

Rating: R

Warnings: RFO, Relena POV, Duo/Heero, sympathetic Dorothy, strippers, bad costumes and all the usual bachelorette party madness.

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing is not mine.

Knock First

My bodyguard for the evening was sitting bolt upright on the seat across from me, mouth in a straight line, eyes moving back and forth as though he thought some kidnapper was going to leap out of the upholstery and make a grab for me.

Would it kill him to lighten up? I wondered and hid a sigh. This was supposed to be a fun evening for a change. I had cleared off my schedule for this party- it was an important one.

I looked down at the present on the seat next to me. I hoped Lucrezia would like it- and my brother too of course, but really; I didn't want to think about that aspect of it.

I glanced across at Heero again. He'd more than likely spontaneously combust if he knew about the contents of the package I was giving to Lu tonight.

But it was a bachelorette party. Kinky stuff was expected, after all.

I wondered if Heero even knew what kinky meant when not applied to a garden hose.

I sighed. I just had to hope that Heero wouldn't put a damper on things. Sally had promised us a wild night.

Wild and Heero did not really go together.

Maybe he'd stand by the door or something? Or wait outside? He couldn't really want to go to this thing.

"You know," I said hesitantly into the silence. "You can just go home after Paragon drops me off. Sally, Lu and Une are going to be there, I should be perfectly safe..." This was the eighth time I had tried to convince him that I didn't need a guard dog for the evening.

For the eighth time- I failed.

"You are going into a civilian apartment building. You need to have at least one guard." Heero frowned. "Two would've been preferable."

"I see," I sighed again and then had a thought. "Where is Duo tonight?" Duo would definitely be more fun to have along. I would bet he'd just join in on the wild stuff. He usually was Heero's partner whenever I was off on a side trip and away from the normal security of the government buildings.

"He said he was busy." Heero's frowned deepened.

I hid my disappointment. Damn. Duo would've made this a bit more fun.

The car stopped in front of Sally's apartment building. Heero got out first of course, then gave me his hand to escort me into the building. It was no more than the usual courtesy I always got from him- he was always proper, polite and formal with me. A perfect gentleman.

Sometimes I wished he would a little less perfect.

We moved quickly through the lobby to the elevators. Heero scowled at anyone who got close to us, as usual. That was always a godsend at political meetings- people got to the point quicker when he was glaring at them. I didn't think it was going to be good for this kind of party.

Then again, these were all women who knew Heero or worked with him. They had to be just as used to him as I was. We'd just have to ignore the glaring.

I shifted the package to a more comfortable position and waited for the elevator to arrive.

Heero managed to scare other people from joining us on the elevator- we were the only ones who got on. The other people just waved or turned a little, indicating that they'd wait for the next. I had to hide a smile. Only Heero could intimidate people with a look.

We stood in the elevator, facing the chrome doors and rode up in silence. Heero didn't believe in talking unless he had something important to say.

If Duo had been there, he would've been cracking jokes, making even Heero smile a bit, I thought. He'd be teasing me about the package and speculating on what crazy things Sally had planned.

I studied our reflection in the doors. We did make a nice looking couple. Heero was taller than me by a few inches, and our coloring looked good together.

Once I would've sighed happily over our images, thought about how perfect we looked together, let my imagination run wild.

Recently I had begun wonder if I wanted Heero that way. Oh he was handsome, polite and kind, but he was also stern and stoic. I wanted someone I could have fun with occasionally.

I wondered if Heero knew what fun was, and then chided myself. Of course he did. I knew Duo dragged him out to movies and sports events- he had to have fun at those, or he'd tell Duo no. Or maybe Duo didn't let him say no.

Did I want someone that I would have to work on having a good time with? Someone that was always so...reserved?

Was Heero really the perfect one for me? I had thought he was for so long... but now I wasn't so sure.

Despite every hint I'd thrown his way, he had never shown me anything besides the fondness that a guy might show his sister. I used to think he was hiding his feelings from me, but now that I knew him better, I wondered if that was truly the case.

I knew that I wanted someone who loved me. Someone who took care of me. Someone who could make me laugh.

Heero took care of me. One out of three wasn't that good.

The elevator doors slid open, and we walked down the hall towards Sally's. The music was audible even in the hallway and I hoped Sally had understanding neighbors.

Sally opened the door when we rang the bell. "There you are!" She hugged me and dropped a kiss on Heero's cheek. I wondered at her audacity, considering that Heero glared at her afterwards. But, this was Sally...

"Relax!" She laughed at him. "Wufei's not here to kick your ass for that one. Come in!"

I followed Sally into the apartment, Heero on my heels. Sally took the present and added it to a stack on a table. A huge group of women were already eating, talking and drinking all over the room. I went to go join the group that had Lu at the center of it. To my relief, Heero stayed by the entrance to the hallway.

"Hey little sister!" Lu gave me a hug and a kiss. "Glad you could make it. See you brought the guard dog." She raised an eyebrow and grinned at me.

"I had to- you know that." I smiled back. "I did try to talk him out of it!"

"Aw, it's sweet he doesn't mind coming along to these things." Lu laughed. "I'm glad you got here. Sally's been hinting about some big surprise for me." She winked at Sally who laughed back.

"I hope you can handle it!" Sally grinned. "I'm expecting it any minute."

As if on cue, the doorbell rang.

Sally headed down the hallway.

"Wine?" Dorothy appeared by my shoulder.

"Thank you," I took the glass from her, surprised to see her here. "I didn't think you'd be back from your trip yet."

"I just got in," she smiled. "My parents are fine, thank you for asking. The trip was dreadful, such turbulence, I am happy to be back and I will be ready for the meetings with the colony representatives next week."

I had to laugh at her. "You left me with nothing to ask!"

"I told you when you hired me as your assistant that I would anticipate your every whim."

"I've missed you these last two weeks," I told her and was rewarded with her smile.

Sally reappeared, wheeling in what looked like a huge cake.

I tried to hide a snicker. It looked just like one of those fake cakes that strippers popped out of- but Sally wouldn't... Dorothy raised an eyebrow at me; I could tell she was thinking the same thing.

Sally wheeled the cake in front of Lu and grinned. "What do you think?"

"I'm not going to fit in my wedding dress if I eat that whole thing," Lu laughed back.

"Oh, we're not eating this one," Sally laughed and nodded to Une, who was standing across the room by the stereo.

The music suddenly changed, the Lone Ranger's theme blasting across the room...

And the top of the cake popped open.

I, and every other female in the room, gasped.

It was a gasp of sheer appreciation.

A man posed on the edge of the cake, one foot still inside, the other propped up on the edge.

He wore the black Lone Ranger mask, and a black cowboy hat covered his head.

Not that we were looking at his face... not when there was so much other good stuff to see...

His boots and chaps were black, and so was the g-string underneath. They set off his tanned muscular thighs perfectly. His gleaming chest was bare.

And the back view was darn near perfect....

The music changed, taking on a suggestive beat, and the cowboy leaped down from the cake and moved towards Lu.

"You the lady that's giving up the single life, ma'am?" The cowboy asked, his voice deep and caressing.

Lu managed a faint nod. I heard Dorothy snicker.

The cowboy smiled, and reached out a hand to her, tugging her out of the little group of women and into a clear space on the floor.

He pulled her hips against his and started a grind. Lu froze for a moment before a wicked smile appeared on her lips and she joined in.

The other women in the room found their voices and began to whoop and holler encouragement. Dorothy managed to make a few comments in my ear regarding cowboys and riding that made me choke with laughter.

I suddenly remembered my bodyguard and stole a glance to see how Heero was taking this little display.

I expected him to look shocked or disapproving.

He was frowning, staring intently at the cowboy; his hand hovering near where I knew his gun was concealed. Oh hell. Of course- a masked stranger would set off every protective cell in his body. Shit. I started to edge closer to him, just in case.

The cowboy had released Lu and moved onto Sally, making his way around the room, dancing a little bit with every woman there. Lu was laughing and snapping pictures- Dorothy had pulled her video camera out.

I managed to get within a few feet of Heero, my sense of alarm increasing, as his body seemed to get tenser and tenser with every passing moment.

Thanks to my position near the exit, I was the last lady the cowboy "visited". When he reached me he slung an arm around my waist pulling me into a close embrace. "Howdy miss," he drawled, his eyes twinkling at me through the mask. "Having a good time?"

I glanced towards Heero, looking as if he was going to explode- in a calm and deadly manner of course- and heard the cowboy chuckle in my ear.

I knew that laugh.

I looked at the cowboy in shock.

"Duo?" I whispered.

"Course it is," he laughed. "Sally thought this would be better for security reasons with you here."

I looked at Sally, who was laughing hysterically with Lu over something. Dorothy had the video camera pointed my way, a wicked smile on her face.

"Does Heero know? Cause he looks like he wants to kill you."

"Nope. Thought I would surprise him."

I hoped Duo wasn't the one that ended up surprised.

Sally was calling for us to come and join Lu as she started to open the gifts. The women all began to cluster around Lu, laughing and giggling.

Duo kissed my cheek, let me go and sauntered over towards the doorway. Heero's glare could've melted steel.

He moved by Heero, tilting his head just a bit and I saw Heero's hand reach out and grab Duo's shoulder tightly. Heero practically dragged him out of the room.

I winced. Heero had looked more furious than I had ever seen him. Should I go and try to ease the situation? Duo had only done this because they were worried about my security.

Then again- Heero more than likely hadn't recognized him- maybe he was just doing his job, checking the masked man out- making sure he wasn't here to stir up trouble... he'd let him go once he realized it was Duo.

Yeah, nothing to worry about.

Dorothy appeared next to me. "Relena? Lu's starting to open the presents and you're staring after that cowboy. He was hot, but I didn't think he'd make you drool."

"That was Duo." I told her and saw her blink with surprise. "Heero dragged him off- I don't think he recognized him- I'm wondering if I should go after them..."

Dorothy shook her head. "Duo can handle Heero, don't worry. Come and have fun." She tugged my hand and I let myself be dragged over to where Lu was opening her presents.

I kept glancing back towards the hallway though. No sign of Heero.

Lu opened my present third. She laughed over what was inside. Especially when I told her that I had already highlighted the important parts of the instructions for Milliardo.

Dorothy nudged me with her shoulder, indicating that I had done well.

Heero still wasn't back. The next package contained something that I couldn't even recognize- from Sally of course- who then began to lecture Lu on its uses.

I slipped away from the group- I doubted they'd notice my absence during Sally's "lecture" and went looking for Heero and Duo.

I hoped that they would be in the hallway, Duo making Heero laugh over something like usual, so that I could go back and enjoy the party.

The hallway was empty. The kitchen was empty. I moved down the hallway towards Sally's bedroom and the bathroom. The bedroom was empty.

The bathroom door was mostly closed, and as I passed it- I could hear Heero's voice...

"... Parading around in that outfit!!"

Oh no. I put my hand on the door and pushed it open carefully, hoping that Duo wasn't changing, but not willing to let Heero lecture him about proper behavior.

The door swung open at my touch and my brain nearly exploded at the sight that presented itself.

Duo was sitting up on the sink; mask and hat off, head tilted back, all that hair cascading around him.

Heero was in between his legs, his mouth on Duo's chest, his hands....

Oh. My. God.

I must've made some kind of noise because Duo's head snapped up and his eyes widened as he looked at me.

"I'msorryIthoughtHeerowasmadIdidn'tknowI'msorry!" I managed and slammed the door shut.

I stood there for a moment, and then realized in my panic that I didn't want to be found there if they opened the door. Oh god no! I started to scurry away as fast as I could and ran smack into Dorothy.

"Relena? What's going on?" I grabbed her arm and dragged her back down the hallway. "Hey! I need to go to the bathroom," she protested.

"They're busy, uh it's being used, I mean someone's in there. You can wait." I pulled Dorothy into the kitchen and closed the door behind us.

My brain was spinning.

Heero.

Duo.

Heero and Duo.

I took a few deep breaths as I leaned against the counter.

"Relena?" Dorothy peered at my face. "Are you okay?" She moved to my side, her hand sweeping over my forehead. "Are you feeling sick? Do you need to go home?"

I shook my head.

"What's going on? I've never seen you like this." She frowned and I searched for something to tell her. Did I lie? Did I pretend I hadn't seen anything?

"I...um... I went looking for Heero- I wanted to make sure he wasn't mad at Duo...." I realized my mouth was moving of its own volition.

Oops.

Dorothy nodded encouragingly when I paused.

"I heard him... well, I thought he was mad, I opened the door and... uh..." I felt my face turn hot. "They were...uh..." I made a gesture and Dorothy's eyes went wide.

"Together?" She asked, and I nodded. Thank god. I wasn't sure I could actually vocalize what I had seen.

To my infinite surprise, she hugged me. She held me close and patted my back soothingly. "I didn't know either dear, I would've said something. I'm so sorry. Are you okay?"

I thought about that.

Part of me was mad. How come he hadn't told me? Why hadn't he said anything!

Then again, why should he have had to say something? This wasn't my business, this was his...

But how did I miss it? It seemed so obvious when I thought about it- Tons of little things I had noticed presented themselves and I couldn't believe I had been so blind. Heero only relaxed around Duo. Only laughed around Duo. Trusted Duo more than anyone else.

D'uh, as Duo himself would say.

"Relena?"

I pulled a little a way from Dorothy and met her eyes. "I think I'm feeling like a first-class idiot. It seems so obvious now- but I didn't see it."

"Or you didn't want to see it," Dorothy suggested, and then softened it with- "or maybe you weren't ready to see it."

Maybe I hadn't been. Maybe all my dissatisfaction, my wondering if I really wanted Heero at all was my subconscious pointing out to me that he wasn't available- so to speak.

"Maybe I wasn't," I told Dorothy and managed a smile for her. "I still feel like an idiot though."

"Lena?" I looked towards the doorway. Duo stood there in jeans and a t-shirt, Heero behind him, a faint flush across the bridge of his nose.

I felt my face get hot. "I'm really sorry guys... I thought Heero was mad at you..."

"I was mad at him." Heero met my eyes.

Well, that was good; at least I wasn't totally in the dark when it came to reading Heero.

"We're the ones that are sorry," Duo moved into the kitchen. "We should've told you. It's just..." He looked at Heero.

"It's new to us," Heero finished. "But we still should've..."

"No," I cut him off. "You shouldn't. Your private life is just that. It's nothing to apologize for. If I had just been paying attention..."

"Still, we owe you an apology." He persisted.

"Okay guys, this is very touching," Dorothy laughed gently. "You are all sorry and you are all feeling embarrassed. Relena because she didn't notice it before and you two because she walked in on you. Let me cut to the chase here for you, in my role as Miss Relena's diplomatic aide. You all wish to be friends still?"

I nodded. Duo nodded. Heero stepped closer to me.

"I know you wanted more from me," he said, meeting my eyes. "I'm sorry. You're my friend and I care for you..."

"And that's plenty." I finished for him.

To my surprise, I believed it. It was enough.

He gave me a brief hug, startling me, and then retreated. Duo was smiling. Dorothy looked amused.

"We're all friends again? Good. I still need to use the bathroom. Duo- you need to get back to the party. Lu, Sally, alcohol, obscene gifts... I think they need you out there. Heero- go back to guarding the hallway and make sure I have a clear shot to the restroom. I'll send Relena out in a minute."

Duo grinned and pulled Heero out of the room. Dorothy grabbed my elbow.

"You really okay Relena?"

"I will be," I told her. "I think I was already at the letting go point. This just kind of- pushed me over."

"Well, at least it was a comfortable landing."

"Thanks to you."

She grinned. "Soooo.... You might admit that you owe me for this?"

"I guess I do." I told her. "What do you want?" A wicked grin spread over her face.

"Monday morning- coffee and a detailed description of what you saw in that bathroom."

I had to laugh. "Pervert. It's a deal."

OWARI

 

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