Bittersweet Part 6
He closed the door and I headed for my closet. "Do I have time to shower?" I asked, suddenly aware of my less-than-pristine state.
Heero nodded. "I'm sure Relena will wait," he said as he perched on my sofa.
There was an odd tone to his voice, and I found myself wondering what it was that had set him off as I gathered up clothes and headed towards the bathroom.
"I'll be quick." I said and closed the door.
It was sheer habit that made me eye the tiny window high up in the bathroom wall. I wouldn't fit through it.
I turned on the shower and stripped. As I stood under the spray and soaped up, my thoughts again returned to Heero's confession.
I could see him being frightened. I could imagine it was beyond frustrating when we showed back up and didn't seem to grasp the seriousness of the situation.
Heero had been angry, I knew that too. Anger makes you say things you usually wouldn't, things you didn't really mean- you lash out and try to hurt the other person. Had he just said those things out of anger?
It was possible, but... I just had a feeling there was more. Something else had come into play- something that had pushed Heero right over the edge... but what?
I finished up, dried myself off and got dressed. When I opened the bathroom door, Heero was right where I had left him, perched on the edge of my sofa. His hands were clasped tightly together and he was staring at them.
"I'm almost ready."
He looked up briefly and nodded, returning once again to the contemplation of his hands.
I pulled on my socks and then laced up my boots. "Heero," I said into the silence. "Can I ask you a question?"
"Of course."
Well, do or die, right? "What else?"
He looked up, puzzled. "What else what?"
"What else was it that day? I know you were worried, I know we left without permission, but that whole scene afterward just doesn't seem like you. Something else made you upset- what was it?"
His eyes widened and I knew I had hit the mark. He opened his mouth, but before he could answer, someone knocked on my door.
I sighed and got to my feet to answer it.
Trowa was on the other side. "Quatre sent me for you. Relena only has a brief break this afternoon, he doesn't want you to miss it."
Heero joined me in the doorway and I gave in. I'd have time to tackle him later about it. Maybe even in the car.
That idea died once I walked down the steps. Quatre had sent a limo. Trowa ushered me into the back and then followed me in. Heero went to sit up front, and I wondered why.
I looked at Trowa as we set off. "Do I even have to ask how you found my address? Nell handed it over without a murmur, right?"
He smiled. "No. Howard did after Quatre called him yesterday and told him about our run-ins with you."
It took me a moment to process that. "I'm going to kill Howard."
Trowa nodded. "He said you'd say that. He said to remind you that he's an old man who likes to meddle."
I rolled my eyes. "So you knew I'd be at the bakery."
"Yes," Trowa's smile widened. "Well, we hoped you would be. We didn't tell Heero of course."
"Didn't want to get his hopes up?" I snorted and he shook his head.
"He wouldn't have gone with us if we had. He's been... different since you left." Trowa looked out the window for a moment. "We nearly lost him a few times."
That made me blink.
"What?" I demanded.
"You remember how it was-" Trowa met my gaze. "It happens often enough in the Preventers- someone loses a loved one and we don't dare send them on certain types of missions right? Except Heero's the best, and we have to send him..."
Loses a loved one? He had practically thrown me out the door! I reminded myself that he had apologized- and to be fair, he hadn't expected me to run. I had seen lots of people at the Preventers after a break up who made stupid mistakes- or tried to make stupid mistakes... I shivered. Heero had done that? But surely...
"Une didn't..."
"She had to-" Trowa cut me off. "And usually she had to send him alone- because the only person he could work with was gone."
"One of you could've gone with him!" I snapped.
"When we could, we did," Trowa nodded. "But we couldn't always go. And it wasn't always missions we had to worry about."
"I had a good reason for leaving!" I started off and Trowa waved a hand at me.
"Of course you did. I'm not telling you this to make you feel guilty. I'm telling you this so that you understand why Heero is different now. He made a huge mistake and he's been paying for it."
"He doesn't seem that different to me," I countered.
Trowa shrugged. "You knew him the best, maybe that makes a difference. The rest of us have noticed a change."
I wondered if Trowa was trying to be insulting, or if he was serious.
The limo stopped and Trowa reached for the door handle. "You'll have to tell me if you notice one too." He got out of the car and I followed.
Heero was already at the hotel door. He held it open for us, and as I walked past him I gave him a careful once over. He looked the same to me, but I knew it hadn't been a physical change Trowa had been talking about.
The elevator ride up to the suite was silent. Heero's eyes were on the floor, his bangs once again shading his expression. Trowa kept his eyes on the numbers above the door. I searched for suitable topics of conversation, but 'Hey Heero, Trowa says you've been going on dangerous missions without backup but it's not my fault' didn't seem like a good conversation starter.
When the elevator doors opened, Trowa remained on the elevator. "Quatre's expecting me," he said and let the doors slide closed.
So I followed Heero down the short hallway. He opened a door at the end and stood by to let me enter. Relena was sitting in the room at a desk.
She looked up and smiled when she saw me. "Duo!" She got to her feet and held out her arms.
"Relena," I said and went to hug her. The door closed behind me with something that couldn't exactly have been called a slam, but was close.
I released Relena and turned, expecting Heero to be standing by the door sheepishly, but he wasn't there.
"Oh dear," said Relena putting one hand up by her mouth. "I told him nothing had been going on..."
I blinked as the meaning of her words struck me. He hadn't been thinking... Why the hell would he have thought that?
I looked at Relena and gave her a smile. "I think we need to talk."
She nodded. "I think you're right."
TBC...
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