Saving Grace Part 3
"How dare he do this to me." Heero's mind harshly declared.
But something more powerful than Heero's aggressive training overtook his need to break free. His aching for a human touch overcame his brain-washed resistance. Giving in totally to his crumbling facade, as it tore away the last layer of Heero's fading resolution, the cold-hearted deliver of death and destruction melted into Duo's tender embrace.
And for the first time in, oh so many years, Heero's tears flowed freely and unashamedly. Duo tightened his enfolding arms as Heero's buried his tear-streaked face under Duo's chin. Sliding his own arms about Duo's slim waist, Heero's held on for his life knowing, if his and the sweet Boy's lifesaving hold was severed then, he would not recover from the wrenching separation.
Duo offered no words of comfort letting his arms convey their assured security. Hard, cleansing sobs shook Heero's body as he surrendered to emotions too long kept pent up inside.
When the sobbing had eased and Heero's catching breaths evened out. Duo released his solid embrace allowing Heero to lean back enough to lock cobalt and violet centers of sight one with the other. "I can't take you with me." Heero whispered lowly, "It is too dangerous."
"You can't leave me behind." came Duo's positive reply.
"But we would be on the run. You don't know what kind of horrible reprisals the Organization is capable of dealing out." Heero stated as images of past betrayers and their gory punishment surfaced flashing with stark realism in his mind.
"They won't be ready to let me go, they have invested to much time and money in my training. They will do whatever necessary to get me back and they would not hesitated to go after you to get to me. We could never be truly secure or safe."
Heero straightened sharply pulling back from the consoling encompassment of Duo's arms. "No! I can't do it! You know the kind of man I am. NO!"
Duo placed his thumb under Heero's chin making him, once again, peer deeply into his liquid purple shaded eyes. "I know the man you want to be." he sighed bending forward until his invitingly moist mouth were a fraction of an inch from Heero's quivering lips.
"What makes you so sure I can change?" Heero breathed out the solemn wondering.
Duo lifted his hand brushing back tousled hair from Heero's misty eyes. "You have already started to change. Your first step was when you couldn't kill me. Then you gave so much of yourself to care for me when I was sick last night."
"But..."
Duo placed a finger lightly on Heero's lips urging him to be quiet until he was finished, "I knew you were caring for me. Even in my fever-struck haze, I knew. I could feel your touch. Not only your physical warmth, but the kindness in your heart. Oh yes," Duo smiled knowing he was absolutely correct in his assessment of Heero's beginning metamorphosis, "I know the kind of man you want to be and I want to help you in your changes. I know it won't be easy, nothing worth having ever is."
Slender fingers ran along Heero's tear-moist cheek as Duo leaned closer still, "Together we can make it. You can't leave me now that you have shared so much of yourself. You've given up so much of your strength for me you can't do it alone."
Heero closed his eyes squeezing out more salty tears welling inside. They opened at the touch of Duo's lips on his. The kiss was a bit timid but warm. Duo wasn't sure if he had said too much or moved things along to fast.
For a split-second Heero tense, retreating from the strange sensation on his mouth. Duo dared to press a bit harder, not rougher, just more insistence. Heero closed his eyes. Without further indecision he willingly gave up the last shard of the shattering invisible crystal wall that had surrounded him for so long.
Heero cupped his hand behind Duo's head tangling his fingers in the lavishness of his free flowing hair. Opening his mouth wider he let Duo's tongue flicker inside, his slipped beside tasting and stroking tongue on tongue.
Heero had had lovers in the past. Nothing serious, often just one-night stands. He had taken from them what he needed at the moment and never looked back. In fact he could only recall one of their names, but he had long ago forgotten the face that went with it.
He knew, too, from Duo's own confession, that the violet eyed Boy had taken lovers in much the same way. It was a case of survival, pure and simple. Survival on the streets. Nothing more, nothing less.
So why, now, did this Duo Maxwell, that was a little more than a stranger to him, touch Heero's soul so deeply? Why did it matter if he was hurt or not? Why?
The gentle kiss ended with a light brushing of their lips. Heero let his hand slid back over his precious lover's shoulder. It rested momentarily on the raised whitish scar before his fingers snagged the chain supporting the gold cross. Duo looked down as Heero lifted the plain symbol of faith allowing its golden gleam to sparkle in his eyes.
"Do you believe in this?" Heero whispered softly rubbing the cross's smooth finish with his thumb.
Duo laid his fingers over Heero's hand entwining them around his fingers and the cross. "I don't know. Maybe." he sighed.
"Then why do you wear it?"
"It is the only thing I have left. It belonged to my mother or so the people at the orphanage told me. They said it was tied around my wrist when they found me sitting some Church's doorstep."
"How old were you?" Heero sighed seeing the pain in Duo's eyes as he remember his past.
"I don't know for sure. Three or four. I just remembering being cold and scared and some lady dressed in black and white telling me it was going to be all right." Duo took in a shaky breath, "But it wasn't." he choked out the last sentence.
"I wish I could change your past, you didn't deserve any of it." Heero declared a tinge of anger accenting his words.
"I doesn't matter now." Duo replied letting his fingers slide off the cross. He brought up his arms draping them over Heero's shoulders. The second kiss was more anxious as he drew Heero as close as he could.
With lips still locked together the two outcasts laid over on their sides. Heero slipped one knee between Duo's legs gentle rubbing his thigh against the ridged erection already beginning to swell up in Duo's hot, wet, crotch. Duo moaned at the firm pressure and wiggled to get all he could from the stimulating friction.
As their lips parted Duo moved his mouth near Heero's ear. His tongue licked at the earlobe before he delivered a playful nip. Heero winced, but didn't retaliate.
Just a day before he probably would have lashed back in some way. Returned the favor with a bite hard enough to draw blood, but that was yesterday.
Duo's lips tickled with a long sigh as he asked, "Have you ever traded sex for not wanting to be alone?"
Heero stiffened at the direct question, then nodded his head yes.
"Well you won't after today." Duo promised coming up to lay atop his lover.
Duo continued the licking and sucking planting moist kisses on Heero's neck and chest. Each taut nipple was suckled. Duo's tongue was put to good use circling each one in turn while his fingers rolled and kneaded the one free of his mouth.
Heero clasped his hands on his partner's shoulders with enough force to leave whitened stripes and, most likely, bruises on his velvet skin. But Duo didn't seem to notice as he worked his way down Heero's chest.
He ran his tongue over Heero's stomach until it was wet then, with a mischievous gleam in his liquid amethyst eyes, blew out a steady breath covering the entire width, cooling the moist skin and sending chills over Heero's body.
Heero drew in a hard breath at the sudden temperature change. But before he could comment on Duo's quite devious assault, the words skipped from his thoughts as Duo roughly tugged down Heero's pants and underwear guiding them downwards until they clear his ankles and dropped with a swishing sound on the floor.
Duo grinned with pleasurable interest at the erectness of his mate's manhood. "Oh." he cooed licking his lips in lustful anticipation, tossing one leg over, straddling just below taut organ.
Heero reached up but Duo grabbed both wrists firmly holding his hands back. "Oh no, lover." he hissed with delight as he pinned Heero's hands over his head straightening out both his arms and body. "I am in charge right now."
Heero could have easily broken Duo's hold. Could have easily taken him any way he so desired. But it felt so good not to be dominant. Not to take by force or coercion but to give someone else the power and trust that someone would not abuse or hurt him. With that decision all of Heero's protective wall was chiseled away.
"Promise not to move and I'll get naked, too." Duo purred. Heero nodded.
Heero obeyed laying perfectly quiet. Hands, arms and body were all content to keep their extended posture while Duo stripped down and added his black boxers to the other discarded clothing on the floor.
Still straddling Heero's hips Duo leaned down once more for a quick, teasing, almost slobbery, kiss. Then a strange look pulled his eyebrows together. A slight frown tuned down the corners of Duo's blushing lips. Heero took immediate notice of his lover's more serious facial aspect. "What's wrong?"
"I don't want you to think of me as a whore. I know what I told you before, about the tricks, but..."
Heero raised his hand brushing aside Duo's flowing hair so he could better see his face. "I will never think of you any other way but my Kawairshii Koibito." he solemnly swore, "Always as my beautiful Boy."
Duo forced his quivering lips to smile reflecting the joy in his heart. "Always your Koibito." he repeated as several violet tinted droplets spilled over his cheeks.
Caressing Heero's inner thighs, Duo trailed the fingertips of each hand upwards until they converged at the base of Heero's aching manhood. Stroking from base to tip, over and over again, Duo soon had Heero's arching his back and writhing in pure ecstasy.
When Duo thought his hands had done all they could, his mouth was then employed encompassing entirely the member's full length. Heero let out a throaty groan at the wonderful sensuality of Duo's lips and tongue.
Duo kept up a steady pace of slow, focused strokes. Heero bucked at each new flourish Duo added to his almost overpowering stimulation.
"Duo! Oh! Please!" Heero moaned feeling the last ounce of his pitiful control vanish leaving him unable to do anything but claw up fistfuls of the damp sheets and hold on for dear life.
And when Heero knew his throbbing manhood was on the verge of exploding, Duo, sensing his partner's keen arousal, pulled back leaving Heero breathless and more than a bit frustrated.
"Don't stop! Not now!" Heero growled at the sudden absence of Duo wondrous mouth.
"Oh I am far from finished, lover." Duo cooed placing his hands behind Heero's knees, lifting and spreading his leg apart until Heero's hips rose off the bed.
"I'm sorry but I don't have anything to makes things go smoother, if you know what I mean." Duo stated lowly.
Heero leaned up on shaky elbows tossing his head to clear his eyes of sweat-soaked bangs, "It's all right. I know you won't hurt me." he replied letting the strange concept of trust guide his words.
Heero clasped his hands about Duo's waist centering his hips, offering himself fully and unashamedly.
"Let me use my fingers first." Duo said wanting to be as gentle as he possibly could.
Locking his sight with the Duo's misty eyes Heero drew nearer. "No, I can't wait. I don't want to wait." he proclaimed, "You aren't my first, but it has been so long." he confessed.
"But you will be my only one from now on, I promise. Please Duo love me now."
Heero tensed as he felt Duo's penis' trickling tip press against his quite tight anal opening. "Try to relax." Duo instructed speaking from pervious experience.
A releasing puff was forced from Heero's lips as Duo slowly and carefully pushed inside. Heero closed his eyes. His arms drew in trying to hold his trembling body steady as Duo continued his painful penetration.
"Are you all right?" Duo whispered. All Heero could do was move his damp face against his patient lover's cheek and nod.
As they moved closer together and the union was wholly achieved, Duo put his mouth to Heero's ear, "Are you ready?"
Yes, yes."
Bringing Heero's hips up further, aligning his anal passage at a more accessible angle, Duo began to rock back and forth. With each thrust and near withdrawal Heero loosened. The dry pain faded with each metered motion until a warm, wet sensuousness replaced the raw ache.
Reaching around with both hands, Heero's partner again caressed and fondled his taut erection. Duo's fingers soon picked up the rhythm matching the grinding of his manhood as he filled Heero and drove him to the brink.
"Now! Duo!" Heero growled tightening down as hard as he could. Duo groaned, gritted his teeth and bowed his back giving all of himself he could.
For a fraction of time that seemed to stretch on forever both lovers held their quivering embrace. "Duo, don't move." Heero pleaded sucking in a labored breath.
"I have to, my love." the beautiful Boy panted as a shudder jerked through every inch of his tingling, damp body.
As Duo came hard, the climatic shudder triggered Heero's release bathing Duo's hands in creamy ejected fluid.
Heero cried out as hot waves coursed through his genitals. Duo held on never wanting their first time to end. Savoring each delicious moment with his newly found soul-mate.
Reluctantly Duo sat back, quickly becoming too exhausted to hold his semi-seated position. Heero sensed the quivering in Duo's arms and legs and, just as reluctantly, allowed his lover to pull out. He guided both bodies back onto the bed acutely aware of Duo's heaving chest as he struggled to catch his breath.
"I'm sorry I didn't have more stamina." Duo panted.
"You were wonderful." Heero praised his lover, "Just perfect."
Afraid their passionate session had been to stressful on Duo's illness weakened system., Heero looked deeply into his lover's eyes for any sign the fever had returned. But they both were so covered in salty perspiration he couldn't tell if the dampness was the result of over stimulation or an unnatural rise in body temperature.
"Are you all right?" It was Heero's turn to ask.
"I'm fine. I'm too happy to be any other way ."
"Let's get covered up before we both take a chill." Heero advised pulling the tangled sheet and blanket over their glistening bodies.
Duo snuggled closer. Taking Heero's hand he curled into the security of his lover's strong arms. "We have to leave soon." Duo sighed. He wanted to keep the reality of their dangerous situation from ruining the moment but he also knew their tenuous circumstances would not grant them peace much longer.
"I know." Heero whispered back keenly aware of their dire condition. "We have time. You need to rest a little while then we will leave."
"I can go now."
"Don't argue with me." Heero ordered firmly tightening his embrace.
Silence covered the room disturbed only by Duo's slightly raspy breathing as he relaxed in the warmth of his lover's enfolding arms.
After a few minutes Duo stirred directing his drowsy sight at Heero's face.
Do you believe in fate?" he whispered.
"I don't know what I believe in." Heero answered honestly. "Why?"
Duo leaned back to better see Heero's eyes. "I have to believe fate or destiny or whatever name you want to give it brought us together. There had to be some guiding force that made your bullet miss by so little. Some outside intervention that caused you to break all your stringent rules and let me live."
Heero considered Duo's statements of belief for a long, thoughtful moment, "I suppose." he conceded to Duo's theory of some higher power.
"There is only one thing that I AM sure of." Heero proclaimed without a doubt in his mind. Pulling his beautiful Boy nearer he gazed Duo's eyes becoming lost in their still innocent inner glow, "I do know you were meant to be my saving grace."
*********
Later That Day
Heero sat restlessly in the minivan that would be his and Duo's "home" for a long time. The running engine purred softly vibrating against Heero's firmly clutched hands on the steering wheel. He drummed his thumbs nervously then looked at his watch for the third or fourth time.
It was not the location in the seeder part of the city that had Heero so on edge. Nor the tough acting members of some "gang" hanging around the sidewalk and porch of the run-down apartment complex. There was no doubt in the skilled gunman's mind he could easily handle any trouble the street punks might make the mistake of starting.
No what had Heero looking in the rear view mirror and over his shoulder was the fact that Chang Wufei had, by now, discovered his fellow Agent had not arrived at the Safe House. Chang had probably gone back to the shabby boarding house and found room number 6 vacant. By now he had contacted the Organization and reported that Heero Yuy was no where to be found.
Heero knew his Bosses, upon receiving Chang's disturbing news, had not hesitated to issue orders to have their rogue Agent found and returned at once.
And if the Bounty Hunters delivered the retrieved Agent in not so pristine condition, the Organization would view that as a well deserved deterrent to any further thoughts of Heero leaving again.
But it was his fear that Duo would become "caught-in-the-middle" that made Heero's anxiousness almost unbearable. The first rule sprang into his mind with such brutal potency it caused a totally involuntary shiver to crash over him with bone-jarring force. LEAVE NO WITNESSES echoed in his memory.
For one brief moment Heero strongly considered putting the van in gear and leaving Duo behind. He knew it would break Duo's heart, but better a broken heart than no life at all.
Heero knew, without a doubt, if he and Duo were found together, only he would survive. His wanting, needing Duo so badly had sealed both their fates. But if the time ever did come and the Organization's bloodthirsty beasts were closing in Heero knew, with Duo's love as his anchor, he would have the strength to mercifully end Duo's life sparing him from the agonizing torture before the end.
Then Heero would turn his pistol on himself and with one final, fatal shot score his last hit, one that would deprive the Hunters and the damned Organization of their victory.
"Come on Duo, hurry up!" Heero hissed under his breath checking his watch again.
As if on cue, Duo stepped through the door. He made his way through the lounging punks as if it was a walk in the park. Each hand carried an over-stuffed duffle bag bursting at the seams with what personal belongings Duo could not leave behind. A equally crammed and faded backpack hung over one shoulder.
Heero made his way around the van's side opening the door as Duo stepped off the curb. "Is that everything?" he asked as Duo pushed the bags and backpack beside Heero's meager possessions, the sum of his, until then, wasted life.
"Yeah." Duo replied glancing back at the deteriorated apartment building that had been his home since he had run away from the orphanage at age ten. Since the "gang" had taken him in and given him the only "family" he had ever known.
"I told my friends they could go through the rest of my stuff and see what they could use."
There would be some things Duo would miss, but not much. Not the hunger pangs of an empty stomach or the sharp pains of an empty heart. Not the cold nights and endless wandering through the city's unforgiving hell.
"Not much at all." he whispered under his breath taking his last look.
"What?" Heero asked hearing Duo mumbling something.
"Nothing." Duo replied reconciling himself to his new life.
A petite auburn-haired girl with soulful eyes stood on the porch wrapping a thin cloth coat about her too thin frame. Duo let his sight linger on the small female's face as she fought back her tears. She raised her hand in a sign of farewell. Duo waved back swallowing hard to hold in check his own urge to cry.
Heero followed his partner's gaze fixing his sight on the person who held Duo's attention. "Someone special?" he wondered aloud as the thought he really knew nothing of Duo's friends or enemies or life came to his mind.
Duo shook his head, swallowing again to clear his throat, "Yeah, she was the first one who made me believe I could turn my life around." he admitted. Then Duo redirected his eyes locking them on his lover's face, "And you were the second."
Heero put his hand on his Koibito's arm squeezing gently, "Are you absolutely sure about this." he insisted wanting to give Duo one more opportunity to change his mind.
It would have utterly destroyed Heero's heart and soul if Duo had said no, had decided to stay, but the peacefulness of knowing Duo would be safe would have far outweighed the heartache.
"Yes." Duo nodded touching Heero's face, "I have never been more sure of anything. Now let's get out of here." he stated climbing in the passenger side. He settled back into the seat pushing chestnut bangs from his eyes and a tattletale teardrop away in the same motion.
"Buckle up." Heero advised. As the van pulled up to the stop sign at the end of the block Heero reached into his belt retrieving the ever present pistol. He hid the sliver weapon under his leather jacket laying on the seat between himself and his quiet, quite contemplative, lover.
Duo caught Heero's action out the corner of his eye. As long as he had been on the streets Duo had never become comfortable with weapons. Even though his friends had urged him to carry some form of protection, especially when his nightly wanderings included the "red light" district, Duo had always refused.
He knew from first-hand experience guns, knives, especially knives, they all caused nothing but suffering and, most often, death. But he was well aware the pistol, and all it represented, was part of Heero's lifestyle and now part of his, too.
As the van pulled across the intersection, Duo reached in his shirt bringing out the gold cross. He clasped it tightly in his fingers bowing his head in silent prayer.
Heero observed his partner's prayerful posture with reverent regard. Like Heero's pistol, Duo's cross was a comforting constancy in an otherwise dispassionate and callous world. "Amen." he whispered the ending entreatment.
"Amen." Heero repeated lowly as aware as Duo of their uncertain future.
As they crossed the bridge leading out of the city both outcasts, and now, lovers and soul mates tried, in their own way, to put the grime and smog and hopelessness of the unsympathetic streets behind them.
They didn't know what lay ahead, what obstacles might have to be overcome. But they did know that whatever fate granted or took away. Whatever time they had to share, the moments, days or years would not be wasted. That together they could face tomorrow with the strength and surety of their love as a uniting force that no one or nothing could defeat.
OWARI
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