Author: hostilecrayon
Pairing: 1x2, 3x4
Rating: Overall, NC-17, Part 1, PG
Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon
Summary: As Duo puts it, "So I was just one big, burning ball of cliché back then."
Disclaimer: Don't own it. Want to watch some 1x2 action, though.
Author's Notes: I was going to do this all in one piece, but I realized this could get long, and it can be inconvenient to open a one shot and see it's like 30-50 pages long. I give all my thanks to Caroline, who handed me the Duo first person plot bunny. She got me into writing the fandom instead of just reading it, and I thank her very much! Writing in Duo's perspective is my favorite way to write fanfiction now, heh.
A Teenager in Cliché Part 1
So I was just one big, burning ball of cliché back then. You know, teenager, horny, just came to terms with my sexuality, lusting after my best friend, the works. The whole Mariemeia event had happened two years prior, so it was peaceful, and Shinigami was told to go about his life as normal. Imagine that, the God of fucking Death told to live a normal life. It wasn't like I'd ever lived one before. But I guess I was doing alright. I was nineteen years old and just starting life. When I finally acknowledged I was gay, my sex drive hit me in full force. Even now, seeing Heero in that tight spandex...
Okay, um, where were we?
After the war, Heero and I did a little work for the Preventers, once I'd gotten away from Hilde and that damn scrap yard. She's a good person and all, but you know, the whole not liking girls thing kinda ruined it for me, even if I still hadn't admitted it to myself at that point. Besides, I wanted to be near Heero, and I mean, who wouldn't? One look at that guy and you're hooked! Girls follow him around like he's some kind of god or something. I'm the God of Death, and most girls are just like "What's with the long hair?" Sheesh.
Don't misunderstand me. I wasn't madly in love with Heero or anything. I'm not THAT cliché. That and the whole ignoring my sexual preferences thing. Heero was my best friend. No, I'm not going to say he was my only friend. I'm not that cliché, either. I had Quat, Tro, and Wu. There were others too, like Hilde and Relena, as much as those girls make me shudder.
Anyways, so the Preventers. We were both very tired of doing that kind of work. Yeah, we were good at it, and yeah, we didn't really know anything else, but we managed to find other occupations using the skills we had from the war. Of course, Heero was working with computers. He's as cliché as I am, really, him and his anti-social geek facade. I preferred to bounce around occupations, making the most out of it. After a couple of months though, I was tired of the lack of stability and grew fond of the idea of going to school.
I was in close contact with Heero, as always, though it was more like me barging in on him and him just staring at me while I talked. Well, it wasn't QUITE that bad. He said at least 10 words for every hour I was there. Yeah, like I said, anti-social. When I told him about wanting to go to school, he offered me to come live with him. It was a shock, let me tell you. I was quite taken aback when he suggested it, further explaining that I wouldn't be able to manage full time college and full time work at the same time. He had a point there, of course. Heero may not speak very often, but when he does, he has something good to say. He's not one to beat around the bush. Naturally, I accepted.
So it was the first night I'd moved in to the spare room of his apartment that I made the most cliché decision of my life: I wanted to have wild sex with Heero, and I didn't care what the cost was. Like I said, cliché. I wasn't ashamed of it either, and I'm really not now. I have no reason to be. Hormones kinda take over when Heero is around, and thinking straight isn't possible. Take that any way you like.
Again, it wasn't because of love that I came to this decision. I mean, yeah, I loved him and all. He was my best friend; he knew me better than anyone due to all our experiences in the war and the increasing amount of time we'd been spending together now that it was over. We enjoyed each other's company, if only to fill the silent void our worlds had become. I knew how he felt about everything, even if his standard response to my rambling was "Hn". So I did love him. I just wasn't in love with him. I was in lust, nineteen and curious, thinking that my first time wouldn't be so awkward if it was with someone I basically trusted with my life.
I laid in my bed that late summer night, a virgin so pure, I'd never even been kissed, and I was dreaming up all the perverse sex positions I could think of. I pretty much decided for myself that Heero was gay. He'd turned Relena down cold, which I have to admit, made me giggle profusely at the time. I thought maybe he wasn't interested because she was crazy obsessed with him, which could have been the case, but he didn't really seem interested in other girls, either.
Then again, he didn't really seem interested in the human species as a whole, but I chalk that up to just Heero being Heero.
~*~
The first morning there was a little awkward. As many times as I'd been in Heero's apartment, I'd never once stayed the night. I didn't want to impose on him too much, him not seeming to be the guest type. I always wondered why he even bothered to have a guest bedroom to begin with. I'd stayed all night before, but only if we didn't sleep, and that was usually if we had a particularly hard case when we were working with the Preventers. We'd sometimes kick back with a few beers while sifting though endless piles of information. So it came as a bit of a shock to me when I opened my eyes and saw a room I barely recognized.
As a matter of fact, that was only the second time I'd ever been in that room. The first time was when I forced him to give me a tour of his apartment two years ago. I sat up slowly and looked around. Before we'd moved my stuff into it, the room had been nothing but a queen sized bed with a plain white comforter on it and a small black night stand. Now though, it was a work of art. My tall, narrow bookshelf was crammed into the corner, overloaded with books on a million different subjects, some laying on top of the messy rows because I just couldn't stuff them in anywhere. A tall dresser was next to it, packed with clothes and covered with random objects like pez dispensers and my key chain collection. The night stand was covered in similar objects, with the addition of a metallic, long necked reading lamp. Beautiful, dark artwork covered the walls. My bedspread and my curtains matched, crushed velvet. I loved that bedspread. I had matching pillows and silk sheets. What can I say? I like the luxury of sleeping comfortably. After growing up on the streets, I ate up every luxury I could for a while there.
Heero had put anything I wanted to keep but couldn't fit in my room in the living room, which was basically just my drawing desk and easel. The rest of my junk was either left behind or stuffed in closets. I didn't really need most of my old stuff, so I called up the local orphanage and let them take whatever I left, which was quite a bit. Heero had everything we needed as far as basic living went. Really, that was about all he had. He was still a minimalist, and the most expensive thing he bought for his home was probably his computer.
It was a Sunday, and school was starting the following day. It's a good thing Heero and I are hard workers. I wanted to rest before starting school, having left my current fad in jobs - department stores - only that Friday. I only had one day to re-cooperate before slipping right into another grind. Not that I minded much. I was used to switching routines and changing things up. It was almost a little frightening to think about the prospect of sticking with something for once. Almost, not quite.
I figured right then was as good a time as any to start my little game of cat and mouse. I generally sleep naked anyway, and that night was no exception. So instead of throwing on some clothes, I just made sure my braid was tight and wrapped a towel around my lower half. I stepped out of my room and walked slowly to the bathroom. I "accidentally" bumped into Heero on my way down the short hallway. I didn't get much of a reaction though. He just moved out of my way. I was at least hoping for a lingering gaze or something. I should have known it'd be a huge challenge.
Fair enough. An easy catch isn't worth having, you know?
I took my time in the shower, thoroughly coating my long hair with the conditioner I'd brought with me. I was almost convinced that Heero didn't use conditioner because it wasn't necessary. Though he did manage to prove me wrong, I go through a giant bottle of conditioner in a week. His little bottle of rather expensive conditioner wouldn't have even seen me through half of one washing. I briefly wondered why he used conditioner that was as expensive as my bottle that was five times the size as I rinsed my hair free of the silk inducing substance. Hell, I took great pride in my hair, but my conditioner worked well enough to keep my hair shiny and smooth. Heero didn't even look like he brushed his hair.
Though I have to admit, his unruly hairstyle is damn hot.
I take even longer to brush my hair, dry it and put it in the mandatory braid. I didn't like people seeing me with it down, let alone touching it, which, I know, defeats the purpose of silky conditioner, but it was mostly so I could brush the god forsaken mess. Heero may have been my best friend and the object of my sex drive, but I still wasn't comfortable with him seeing me without my braid. I silently prayed he wouldn't want to take it down when I finally got him into bed before I walked back down the hallway, dripping wet and wrapped in my towel again.
Instead of dressing, I decided to throw on my devastatingly short white robe and parade around the house half naked. I tied the sash loosely, letting the front hang open a little, showing off my defined chest. Despite all my battle scars, I still looked pretty damn good. Hello sex appeal.
"Hey man." I inclined my head towards him as I grabbed a bagel from the kitchen, walking right in front of him on my way to lounge in the armchair, consciously ignoring how high the robe slid up my thigh as I sat down.
"Get lost in the bathroom?" He asked sardonically, his gaze never leaving the morning news blaring from the TV.
Whether or not he meant the undertone that phrase had to it, I had the decency to blush a little. "You try washing, conditioning, brushing, drying and braiding this huge mass on my head and see how much time you spend in the bathroom. You should definitely start taking your showers first."
"Hn."
I chewed thoughtfully at my onion bagel. I was getting nowhere, and fast. Basic sex appeal seemed to escape Heero all together, which wasn't too surprising. It just made the challenge even harder. I was really going to have to think on this one. I didn't want to be too forward and creep Heero out or anything. I preferred for him to make the first move. But getting through to Mr. Glare-of-Death wouldn't be easy. We may not have been doing missions anymore, but Heero still carried that same "I do it for the mission" mentality. It would have been sickening, if only the dedication wasn't so awe inspiring. I mean, I was a dedicated soldier, but I always knew how to kick back, too. Heero was just intense. I often wondered what it was like to be THAT dedicated to something.
The news ended before I'd come up with anything, so I reluctantly stood and said, "I guess I should go get dressed."
"Hn." Again, he didn't bother looking at me.
I dressed quickly; something tight and sexy, but nothing that really screamed "I'm gay, fuck me!" Just some snug blue jeans and a small t-shirt. "Hey Heero, want to catch a flick?" I asked casually when I made my return to the living room.
He shrugged in mute acceptance.
"Damn, you're one hell of a conversationalist today." I joked sarcastically. He ignored me and got up to walk to the door. I often teased him about his inability to hold a decent conversation, so I knew it didn't bother him. It was kinda starting to bother me, though. Things would have gone a lot smoother if he'd have just talked to me sometimes.
~*~
He let me pick the place and the movie. That was his mistake. I, of course, chose the little two dollar theater across town, where they offered a plethora of corny, B rated movies. Four bucks at the door and forty at the concession stand later, we'd finished a horrible double feature which left me in giggling convulsions at the bad acting, and left Heero glaring at me with a look that plainly said "Why the fuck did we just waste 3 hours of our lives here?"
"Relax, Heero. You're supposed to be having a good time, you damn hermit." His glare only got more pointed. Thank god I was immune to it. "Let's grab something to eat."
"You already ate half the concession stand."
He had a point. "So what? Boy's gotta eat! I could really go for some real grub right about now! What about you?"
"Whatever."
"What are you in the mood for?"
"I don't care."
"Chinese it is then!"
I drug him off to the nearest Panda Express, and though he eventually stopped glaring at me, he still wasn't talking to me. I'd figured out that my objective would never be completed if he never spoke, so I decided to revert to plan B. We'd round off this night with some mixed drinks. It wouldn't really help A LOT, but it would have to suffice. His tongue got quite a bit looser when he was riding on a good buzz, and a semi-decent conversation would be achievable. It was a start, and with most a day's worth of efforts gone to waste, I needed it.
The second we got home, I went about making some Fuzzy Navels. It's one of my favorite mixed drinks, and there's no denying it: I make a bitchin' Fuzzy Navel. I overdosed them a bit on Vodka; the stronger the drink, the quicker Heero starts talking, and I brought two nice, tall glasses to the living room. I busted out with a game of chess, and plan B was in full swing.
Unfortunately, Heero is much better at strategy games than I am, and I was losing horribly when I got up to make us more drinks fifteen minutes later. I was still losing fifteen minutes after that when I did a repeat of refilling our drinks.
But not nearly as bad.
The alcohol was starting to get to Heero, who was always a light drinker to begin with. I could barely believe he hadn't at least argued when I suggested my infamous Fuzzy Navels. Then again, he'd had them before, but with less than half of the alcohol content that was in them that particular night. I'd never seen Heero drunk before, and I assume he probably had never been, but I was pretty sure that I'd be the first to see it happen. The two of us had already put down more than a pint of Vodka and counting. I had a much higher tolerance to the stuff, but even my buzz was pretty strong.
I chuckled. Things were about to get interesting.
Heero won the game - barely. As I put the pieces back in the box, I snuck a couple peeks at him lounging on the couch. His face was flushed and his eyes were a little glassy. Half of his third drink was gone, and I smirked. One sexy, drunk Heero barely registered my approach as I sat down a little too close to him. Not close enough to be touching, but close enough for his drunken body heat to tickle the skin on my arm.
"Thanks for letting me crash here for a while." I started.
"It's not a problem."
"I always wondered why you had a spare room. You never have guests." I giggled, a bit giddy from my now borderline drunk buzz. "I guess it's a good thing you did, eh?"
"That's why I had it."
I gaped at him for a minute. He was looking at me. Well, sorta. It seemed like he was having a little trouble focusing. I was trying to figure out whether he meant he had it for me or if he was talking about situations where people needed to stay for a while, like me. I couldn't draw any conclusions, so I finally managed a "Huh?" holding the confusion just this side of my voice.
"I got a two bedroom so you'd have a place to stay if you needed one."
Huh. Well, didn't that just beat all. My best friend had been thinking about my security for at least two years. I had no idea.
"You don't keep jobs."
I deflated. He must have thought I was some kind of gimp or something. "Hey, I can keep a job if I want."
"But you don't. That's why you're here, isn't it?" Well, wasn't he just Mr. State-The-Obvious today.
"I'm here because you invited me." I rolled my eyes at him. "I just want to go to school, man. I could have got by, but you offered to make it easy on me, and why do things the hard way when I don't have to? I was getting by just fine before, thank you very much. Don't flatter yourself, Yuy. I don't need your support. I just don't pass up golden opportunities."
He shrugged, steadying himself afterwards, because it was quite obvious that his balance wasn't up to speed. "Fuck Duo, how much alcohol did you put in these drinks?"
It was my turn to shrug. "Enough."
He was trying to glare at me, but it just doesn't have the same effect when his eyes are glazed.
"Hey Heero..." I said, getting back to my initial plan. "Have you ever had the hots for someone?" Yeah, I was just about drunk here. I probably wouldn't have asked him if I were sober, or even mildly buzzed. But liquid courage does things to you. I figured he'd probably forget most of this conversation later, anyway.
He raised his eyebrows. "The hots?"
I face-palmed. "Come on man, don't tell me you don't know what having the hots for someone means."
"I know what it means. It's just an odd question. Sounds like something a fifteen year old would say." I suspected Heero had no idea how fifteen year olds acted, let alone talked to each other, but I let it slide, hoping he'd answer my question.
He did.
"I've been attracted to someone, yes." He tried to glare at me again. It was getting kinda funny to see him keep failing. "I'm not a robot, you know."
"Could have fooled me." I muttered.
His eyes narrowed. "What was that?"
"Nothing." He seemed to let it go, which was a good thing, really. I didn't want to make him angry. That would completely interfere with The Plan. "Who?"
"None of your business." Ouch. I was his best friend, and he wouldn't tell me. Not even drunk.
"Don't tell me it's Relena."
He cringed visibly. "God no. I'm not blind."
I laughed wholeheartedly. "Well Heero, you don't really know all that many girls." I was definitely treading on dangerous ground, but hey, like I said, no matter the cost.
"Hn."
"A standard response, eh? Fine then. Don't tell me."
"Okay. What about you?"
I told you he made a better conversationalist when he was drunk. Inquiring wasn't one of Heero's normal traits. Apparently, they didn't think it was necessary for the Perfect Soldier to be able to hold a simple conversation. "Well, of course I have the hots for someone."
"Have? I thought we were talking past tense here." Whoops. He was right, I asked him a past tense question. Oh well, maybe he'd get the idea faster this way, if he remembered tonight at all.
"Yeah, well, I've had to hots for someone for a while, so past tense and present tense both work." I grinned at him.
"Hilde?"
It was my turn to cringe. "What are you, psychotic? What the hell would I see in her?"
He shrugged, lighter this time.
"I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours." I raised my eyebrows, knowing with absolute certainty that it wouldn't work.
"This isn't kindergarten. Besides, it's none of my business who you're seeing."
"Who said I was seeing someone?"
"No one. But if you do start seeing the person you're attracted to, it's no business of mine."
"I beg to differ." I grinned dangerously. Man, keeping my responses in check was hard to do when I was drunk, horny and fantasizing about his flushed body.
"Excuse me?"
"Well, you're my best friend and all, and I am living under your roof." Nice save, Maxwell. Except that comment might have screwed up my subtle hinting.
"It's yours too now." He said quietly. "I think I'm going to go to bed before I get sick. Next time, we'll stick with beer. I don't trust you to control the hard alcohol."
He got up and stumbled to his room, with me close behind. Once I was snuggled up in my soft sheets, I sighed. Plan B was pretty much a failure. Oh well, I figured I could make up for it later. Plan C would have to be crafty, and it would probably help if it took more than a few minutes to come up with it. I rolled ideas around in my head as I drifted to sleep, hoping maybe something would come to me in my dreams.
TBC...
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