Notes: The arc begins between one and two years after Endless Waltz. Heero POV in this story.
Life With Heero Arc Part 68
PDAs
Heero checked the departures board and sighed. His shuttle's departure had been pushed back yet again. Some things never changed - centuries of technological development and public transportation still was hardly ever on schedule. Briefly he debated leaving the shuttleport to eat at a nearby restaurant but decided that it wasn't worth taking the chance that the departure might be moved up again. He didn't want to miss his flight and end up having to wait till tomorrow to head home.
'Not just "home",' he admitted silently. 'Home to Duo.' Home to have a late meal together, discuss the presentation a bit, then head off to bed. Home to a warm hug and a "welcome home" kiss.
Watching the passengers disembarking and being greeted by their loved ones, Heero added a qualifier to his previous thought. The welcome home kiss would come considerably later than the hug since it would have to wait until they reached home. He and Duo had exchanged greeting hugs long before any thought of taking their relationship beyond friendship had ever been considered. That was familiar territory, public or not. But kissing - that was something that they had yet to do outside of their own home.
And watching the greeting hugs and kisses going on around him, Heero was a bit sorry about that. It would be nice to be able to do that sort of thing without feeling self-conscious or uncomfortable. But he didn't think he could. 'I don't think that I'm ready for that... Maybe I never will be...'
Which could be a problem. Duo obviously expected that they would eventually be more open about their relationship; after all, he'd mentioned holding hands in public and dating as prerequisites for taking the next step in their relationship. And while Heero wasn't really ready to actually take that next step, he thought he should be at least working towards it.
'Duo has always been openly affectionate. Always ready to greet his friends with a hug. And he's never minded people watching him on the dance floor...' Heero thought uneasily. And Duo had freely admitted that he wouldn't have made the first move towards a relationship because he wouldn't have wanted to pressure Heero. Which he was guessing meant that the ball was firmly in his court as far as taking any new steps was concerned too.
'It's been almost three weeks since Hilde's wedding and we haven't done anything more than what we started out with the very first day - kissing and holding one another. Mild making out. Nor have we actually gone out on a "date" or even held hands in public,' he realized. He couldn't help but think that, had it been up to Duo alone, they would not only be openly dating but also exchanging greetings like those he was watching other couples exchange. Hugs that lasted just a little too long to be considered strictly a "friendly" hug. Kisses that ranged anywhere from perfunctory to tender to passionate.
Could he do that? Could he actually go through with a public display of affection? The very notion made his palms sweat. 'I feel conspicuous on a dance floor surrounded by dozens of other dancers; how the hell am I ever going to handle holding hands and kissing in public?' He wasn't sure. But if Duo was waiting for him to make the next move in advancing their relationship, he was going to have to figure it out. And soon. It wasn't fair to keep Duo waiting indefinitely just because he had a few issues about attracting too much attention still left after all the work Duo had put into helping him get past the worst of his post-war adjustment problems.
As he finally boarded his shuttle, Heero continued to consider the problem. 'Maybe... maybe if I just concentrate on Duo? Let the old training kick in at least partially and focus on Duo alone; ignore my surroundings completely?' It might work. It was worth a try, anyway. The question was when to try it.
Sooner was probably better. 'Do it before I give myself time to think about it too closely. Before I have time to talk myself out of it again.' Well, Duo was supposed to be picking him up from the shuttleport today... Heero swallowed nervously and wiped his palms on his thighs. 'You can do this. Just tell yourself you're giving Duo a pleasant surprise, Yuy. No backing down. Just spend the rest of the flight getting yourself into the right frame of mind,' he told himself firmly. He could do it. Would do it. 'For Duo...'
TBC...
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