"Clowns never have, nor will they ever be helpful to hang around while in a horror movie. As harmless as the might seem, they WILL kill you once you let your guard down."
--- How To Survive A Horror Movie
"If you're a cute blond with blue eyes, you are pretty much fucked."
--- How To Survive A Horror Movie
"When you're searching a house because you think there's something dangerous there, for God's sake turn the bloody lights on!"
--- How To Survive A Horror Movie
Things that go Thump in the Night Part 2
Scooby Doo Gang (aka Don't Split Up You Morons!!)
Quatre shook his head turning back to the place where Trowa had been sitting as a bolt of lightning illuminated the room.
"I guess we better get go bed too-huh? Trowa?"
Silence filled the room... and the place where the Heavyarms pilot had been sitting was empty.
Trowa was gone.
"Trowa? Are you there?"
The room was filled with silence and shadows. Quatre couldn't swear to it, but he thought he could hear the low, truck-engine rumble of a growl fill the pitch-black of the living room.
Eeep.
Quatre pulled the blankets over his head. That was one of the rules, right? At least, he thought so. If you pulled the blankets over your head and closed your eyes, nothing bad could get you. Right... right?
Briefly, he considered just screaming for Wufei and the others. But he was a Gundam pilot, dammit. Gundam pilots did not scream like tortured kittens when they were left alone... in the dark...
Without candy.
This sucks.
Creeping along on the floor with the blanket pulled over his head, looking like a giant fuzzy amoeba slithering across the carpet, Quatre headed in the general direction of the hallway, heading towards Duo and Heero's room.
*thump*
Oooooowwwwww...
He crawled down the hallway and pushed the door leading to Duo and Heero's room. Neither sweating, moaning, horny teenager noticed as Quatre The Fuzzy Radioactive Amoeba From The Den slithered into the bedroom, homing in on the bag of mini-Crunch bars lying abandoned on the floor near the bed.
~*~
*THUMP*
Duo threw his head back, arching up into Heero's thrusts. "Ahhhh, Oh, shit, Heero, that's so good..."
*THUMP*
"Oh, Heero, uh, Heero, God..."
*THUMP*
"OW!!! Heero, that's the headboard!! Back down a little!!!"
"Gomen..."
"Oooh, nevermind, I don't give a shit, bang away! Ahh..Ahhhh...AaaaaAAHHHHHWHATINTHEHELLISATTHEFOOTOFTHEBED!?!?!?"
Duo's violet eyes were as wide as saucers in the darkness and he flailed under Heero wildly. Heero pulled away and looked over.
A large shadowy mound of something was sitting at the foot of the bed.
*crunch*
*crunch*
*crunch*
"OHMIGOD!!! HEERO IT'S A MONSTER KILL IT!!! IT ATE WUFEI AND IT'S CHEWING ON HIS BONES!!!!" Duo shrieked, diving under the covers.
"Baka... that's not a monster... you've had too much candy..." Heero muttered. He grabbed the tube of lube from the sidetable, sweat glistening in the moonlight as he moved, and pegged it at the fuzzy gray blob as hard as he could.
"AII!!"
"See, I told you it's not a monster. It's only Quatre eating Wufei and chewing on his bones," Heero said matter-of-factly, lying down on the bed in a flop. "Nothing to worry about."
Quatre flung the blanket off of him, glaring. He tried to talk, but his mouth was full of candy bar. He swallowed hard, then glared. Glaring was more effective when your cheeks weren't full of chocolate, making you look like a rabid chipmunk.
"Hey!"
"If you wanted to join us, you could have just asked," Heero said, raising an eyebrow.
Quatre blushed furiously, glad the others couldn't see it in the darkness. "I didn't come to join you, I came to tell you that Trowa is missing."
"So what?" Duo said, his voice muffled under the covers. "If you're eating my candy, Winner, you're a dead man. I was saving that."
"Not anymore," Quatre said. "So what?! He could be lost out there in the dark or something. He sounded funny earlier, Heero. I think we should find him. It's dangerous for him to wander out there in the woods with no lights to guide him back!"
"Yeah right," Duo muttered, pulling the covers off of his head. "He can see like a fuckin' cat in the dark. I'm real worried."
Quatre glared.
Heero growled. "Out, Quatre, and let us finish. We'll be there in a minute."
"Five minutes," Duo growled back.
Heero glanced at him. "Two."
"Four."
"Three."
"Deal."
Quatre slunk out of the room, blanket and bag of candy in hand, and closed the door behind him, listening to the noise start up again. He rolled his eyes.
*thump*
*thump*
*THUMP*
*THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP*
"AHHHH!!"
~*~
A satisfactory interval later (two minutes, forty-eight seconds, to be exact), Duo and Heero emerged from the bedroom again. Heero looked smug and Duo just looked dazed, disheveled hair falling everywhere as he carried a flashlight.
"Fine. Let's get Wufei," Heero growled. "If we have to lose sleep looking for Trowa, so does he."
"Doesn't sound like you were sleeping to me..."
"..."
Heero walked down the hall and banged hard on Wufei's door. "Chang! Open! Now!!"
When the Chinese pilot didn't concur, Heero flung the door open. Then slammed it shut again, cobalt eyes wide in the darkness.
"What?" Duo whispered, flashlight in hand. He held it beneath his chin nervously, throwing his face into eerie relief. "Is he dead? Is there something chewing on his bones? Is he a zombie or a vampire? Did an ax murderer get in the house and impale him with his katana?!"
"...I didn't know Wufei sleeps with a teddy bear..."
Duo and Quatre looked at each other silently.
"WUFEI!!" Heero barked. "GET UP!!"
A few seconds later, Wufei appeared at the doorway, glasses skewed on his face, which was set into a deathglare that could send Freddie Krueger hiding under the bed.
"It is three in the morning!! What justifies you waking me at such an hour, Yuy!? I demand an explanation!!"
"We can't find Trowa."
Wufei growled. "Chuckles is practically Tarzan, king of the jungle. I'm sure he can handle himself."
Quatre scowled. "He'd kill you if he heard you call him that."
"I'd like to see him try."
Heero grabbed Wufei unceremoniously by the shirt, dragging him out of the room with pillow in tow. "What the hell are you doing, Yuy!?!?"
"If I have to be out of bed at three in the morning, so do you."
The four set out, none seeing the pair of glowing pale green eyes watching them from the window.
TBC...
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